Sadly, she was wrong. And Alex confirmed it in my stead.

“Oh, come on. Maybe he is just trying to throw us off his trail?!” now Eva is the one glaring at me (wherever was it that I was).

I had no business throwing them off my trail. I wanted them ON my trail: finding love, getting someone to bed, riding into the sunset and what-not.

“He just said there is no need, because he would lead us to a happy ending. And, as I said, he is omniscient so… never wrong. The most he can do is withhold information from me, which is just confusing and annoying.” Alex says. “So we are back to square one, he is just a voice.”

Eva remains mad. “Fine. He is just a voice that narrates your life. In English. Maybe it is because we are in San Pedro, it tracks.”

Alex and Eva’s university was in the priciest and most pretentious city of Latin America: San Pedro Garza García, Nuevo Leon. Or at least it pretended to be in it, since it was right in the middle of the industrial area of Santa Catarina and the "posh" area of San Pedro; it worked for them to sell themselves as a school in a fancy place, but file taxes for the less pricy municipality. Anyway, in San Pedro, Spanglish was the true official language, even if no one dared admit it. San Pedro liked to pretend it was the Upper East Side of New York, it had people within it with enough capital to validate that claim; but it was closer to the Houston suburbs, if anything. Still, it was a fun enough town, they liked it well.

“He still spoke in English while I was with my parents up north. I don’t think it has anything to do with San Pedro,” Alex says chuckling,

“It was worth a guess,” she says. Eva was frustrated, she liked a mystery, but she had always been smart enough to figure things out quickly. She was not one for build up, she preferred instant gratification whenever possible.

“Eva, I’ve had this narration playing around me for 22 years. This will be a slow build up, just chill,” Alex intervenes.

“UGH! Can you tell your narrator to stop looking into my mind?!” He wouldn’t, and she knew it. No point in it, I wouldn’t stop. Couldn't stop. “Now I get why you were so mad yesterday.”

Alex smiles at that. Someone else trapped in the game now. Which finally make him think, why was this all so important?

“He said you’d help me find true love, you know,” that caught Eva’s attention. “Right before I left, he said that because you believed me I’d be able to find true love.”

“That… makes no sense. How would I do that?”

“Maybe you already know him?” He pauses for confirmation on my side. I have nothing to say. “Oh, now that I need you to, you don’t want to talk?”

“Wouldn’t that ruin the story?” as usual, Eva was quick on the uptake. But for whatever it’s worth, she did not know him. Yet.

“He seems to think it will. But he also confirmed that, in fact, you don’t know my true love yet.”

They were both getting restless. This meeting was verging on pointless. Eva was stumped and Alex had just come to see if Eva could think of something new. Something he had not yet figured out. They were also getting hungry.

“Let’s buy some food. My treat.”

***

Alex had bought a sandwich, his relationship with Subway was pretty steady. Eva was mostly just fiddling with her chicken tenders and fries. They had decided the cafeteria was boring and that they needed some fresh air, so they were now sitting in the courtyard in front of it. A few years back the industrial design students had filled it with outdoor chairs and tables, and the trees around them provided excellent cover from the sun, to enjoy the summer air without getting burnt. It was soothing.

“I said I’d help you get rid of it on a whim, but I don’t understand why you hate him,” Eva says while examining a particularly huge fry. “Doesn’t it have perks? Having an all-knowing voice in your head at all times and whatnot?”

The honest answer was “Sometimes”, but Alex would never admit that. He finds it complicated. Hearing me gave him a certain foresight, on occasion. If I spoke about how he didn’t need to study for an exam or about how someone said something in a distrustful tone, or had an ulterior motive, he could use my knowledge for his benefit; but my narration occurred mostly in real time, it did not stretch too far into the future unless I found it necessary or it could be convenient for his narrative. It did give him a tremendous insight on intent and the past of others though, which made him very good at picking friends. Which is why he only had five of them. He was picky.

It was not that my narration was bad or inconvenient. He just dislikes it because he feels his future is somewhat limited by it, as well as his capacity for surprise. Like when he found out he was gay mid date because of me.

“Ugh, don’t mention that.” He growls at the memory.

“What? I just asked a question.”

“Oh! No, Eva, I am sorry. He was speaking about me and sometimes it distracts me,” Alex explains. “When he goes on particularly long tirades it’s like time stops for a bit, while I listen. I call it ‘being in the pocket’, like a pocket dimension of sorts?”

“So… he stops your time?” She seems concerned and her eyes shoot upward looking for me again. They never learn.

“Not exactly. It's more like a slow down? It does let me think sometimes! I use it a lot to focus on exams if he shows up,” that makes him smile. “Like you say, it has its benefits, but they are few and far between, he is mostly just a pinche culero that does whatever suits him and won’t let me have quiet. I fear he’ll lead me right into a psychiatric ward.”

“‘OW ‘ath ‘e not led chu ‘to a chychatric ward? ‘hat ish ‘e queston,” Eva asks, with a mouth full of chicken.

“It almost happened. Twice. He intervened,” he admits.

“Intervened?”

“He spoke and people heard him,” Eva's chicken falls mid bite. “They let me go after. Mostly ‘cuz they didn’t want ANYTHING to do with it, but it has kept me out of a ward.”

“So 'e can 'e 'eard out of 'is ow' vo'ition?” Eva still has half a tender in her mouth and other on her plate.

“I think it only happens if something external might affect the story,” that was as close as he had gotten to understanding it. There was nothing else to say.

“Could I hear him?” Eva was excited at the prospect.

“Who knows? But I wouldn’t wish it on you. He is not a plaything, he is more of an imposition,” he says with a laugh. He is always so rude to me.

“But this is a fun idea. You say he is omniscient, right? So he must have known I’d be there before you started fighting him, which means he pushed you to your breaking point and knew I’d hear it.” Eva looks at the sky and winks. I am not there, but I would have honestly winked back. “If that’s the case, and he knew I’d believe you AND that I will lead you to true love, then this is not only part of his plan, but it makes me think that he always speaks to you for specific reasons at specific moments.”

Alex pondered on that one. It made sense. When I revealed to him he was gay, he was wondering why he didn’t enjoy kissing his girlfriend as much; when I had been heard by other people, it was because I perceived his story was in danger; whenever a person could be of use or a danger to him, their whole story got laid out in an instant; and then there was the Marcos episode… he always thought I only spoke because I needed to narrate, he had never stopped to think on the reasons for my narration.

“I don’t know why he speaks. I have never sat and questioned how his narrations services my plot development or character arch or whatever,” he finally says, like a true Literature major.

“See? Maybe that is why you need me. You say he only narrates for long periods at crucial moments,” Eva ventures with a smile. “So what if whenever he starts on a long period, like this one, we use his commentary to see where it leads you and WHY do you need it.”

“So, we would treat my life more like episodes and less like chapters?”

“I am not sure that there’s a difference, but sure! Knock yourself out,” Eva answered.

“Chapters tend to be overarching, they connect a thread, but they do not always solve their self-contained mystery or problem,” Alex explains. “Episodes tend to focus on one arch and problem at a time, you solve that and move on, sometimes they connect. SO, with what you are saying I think we should treat his narration as an… episode of the week sort of deal?”

“So he is our very own ‘monster of the week’? I like that,” Eva was back on her high spirits. Finding out the “mystery of the narrator” was quickly becoming her favorite thing of the upcoming semester.

“First we discover why he speaks when he does, maybe then the reason he follows me, and then I can finally get rid of him!”

“I still don’t see why you hate him. I wish I had a narrator that could lead me to an undeniable true love,” she says.

Alex just keeps eating his sandwich and thinking about their voice rehearsal in two hours. He didn’t want to fight or explain it to her. He had read enough love stories to know that the good ones are never easy or comfortable, lots of shit tends to happen for the love to be worth it... and I had been bragging his whole life that his was a good one.