The museum trip was fun for the kids, but it took a lot out of me. Scrounging some sort of dinner together was a monumental effort, and would have been worse if Sybil hadn’t insisted on both her and Parker pitching in. I let Sybil cook the meat—she could better gauge if it matched with what she, Parker, and Niall liked. Parker was old enough to cut up the veggies, so I let him do that.
I wasn’t fond of the fact that Sybil could tell I wasn’t doing well, but them helping was a huge relief. I just really hoped this sickness would break soon so things could go back to normal. However, today’s dizzy spells weren’t a good omen.
I was in the process of roasting the veggies when I heard the front door open and shut. Niall appeared in the kitchen a few minutes later, looking dirty and haggard. He smelled of manure, hay, and sweat, the combination of scents pungent to my sensitive sense of smell, even with a stuffy nose. He must have had a long day too.
“Wow, look at all these helping hands,” he commented with a tired smile.
“Hey,” I greeted, standing against the oven and enjoying its warmth. “Yeah, the kids have been a huge help in getting dinner ready,” I agreed, smiling as I glanced over at them.
Niall nodded. “That’s great.”
“Especially since it means you’ll get some decent steak,” Sybil chipped in, smirking as she tooted her own horn.
I rolled my eyes, but couldn’t say much of anything, because she was right.
“Even better,” Niall said, laughing a little.
“How was your day?” I asked.
Niall let out a breathy laugh and smiled, weariness etched in the muscles of his face. “Let’s just say I’m glad to be home,” he replied, running his fingers through his hair, which stuck up, shaped by sweat, even after his hands went back to his sides. “How was yours?”
“It was good. We went to the museum,” I replied, nodding over to the kids. “There were some new exhibits they enjoyed.”
Niall nodded. “Cool,” he said. “I want to hear more about it over dinner. I’m going to take a shower first.”
“Smells like a good idea,” I teased, which garnered a smile from Niall.
-
I let Niall and the kids do most of the talking over dinner. Truth be told, I didn’t feel much like talking, or even eating. Each bite was its own effort as I forced myself to chew and swallow. The meal felt like stones piling up in my stomach, weighing me down. I almost considered making myself throw up just to feel a little bit better, but that would have been a waste.
I could tell Niall was making an effort too. He was exhausted, but managed to listen to the kids talk and ask questions about their stories. I felt bad that I wasn’t contributing anything to the conversation and giving him a break every now and then, but it took all my energy to concentrate on eating. Even if I did talk, I didn’t know that I could sustain anything other than a monotone, or think of anything to ask anyone.
Sybil was still glancing at me every now and then, policing me with her silent gazes. At one point, Niall took notice and studied me for a few moments while Parker chattered before returning his attention to my little brother. He wouldn’t bring anything up at dinner, but I knew he would give me a third degree later. He was another one who was concerned about whatever virus I had. I didn’t want him to be, just as I didn’t want Sybil to be, but for all my reassurance and pushing through, I couldn’t seem to dissuade either of them.
“Hey, Niall,” Parker piped up. “Can we go for a walk tonight?”
“I don’t see why not,” Niall replied with a nod. “I could definitely use one. We can go after dinner.”
A walk. Half of me really wanted to go on one, but the other half knew I just couldn’t. They would have to go without me. Internally I felt a little disappointed. I wanted to fly, but more than that, I wanted to spend time with Niall. This part of the year was so busy that it felt like I barely saw him. “Walks” were almost always guaranteed quality time. With today’s fatigue and dizzy spells, though, I couldn’t risk it. Falling out of the sky was not a risk I was going to take.
Parker cheered, and Sybil looked pleased for a moment before returning her gaze to me. I ignored it. I wasn’t going to say anything to put a damper on her excitement. She was fourteen, for Pete’s sake. She shouldn’t be worried about me.
Parker chattered on excitedly for the remainder of the meal, talking sometimes about what he planned to do on the walk, sometimes talking about the museum, other times filling Niall in on school updates, and sometimes just talking about nothing in particular. Whatever the subject, Niall maintained his same, good-natured, patient look of interest. I was so grateful for him.
It wasn’t long before everyone was finished, especially since walking was on the table. I collected the dishes and set them in the dishwasher. The kids went upstairs to get on some more appropriate clothes for running around the woods at night. Niall came up next to me, resting his hand on the small of my back.
“Hey, how you doing?” he murmured.
“Not great. I’m really tired,” I told him, leaning against him more than I really needed to. “I’m gonna stay home tonight.”
Niall frowned and his brows furrowed. “Hey, we don’t have to go tonight. We could all stay in,” he offered.
I knew he was worried, but I didn’t want to deprive the kids of any fun. Besides, even if he didn’t admit it, it would disappoint him to stay in. I shook my head. “No, no, that’s silly. That’s not necessary. I’m fine, I just need a little rest. You guys go have a good time.”
“Are you sure? I know you haven’t been feeling well,” he said.
“I’m sure.”
“I don’t feel good about leaving you alone, though,” Niall murmured, still frowning. His hand moved from my back to my arm as he unconsciously drew me a little bit closer.
I rolled my eyes. “I’ll be fine.”
“Should I confirm with Sybil?” Niall asked, looking down half-seriously and half-teasingly. “She’s been watching you like a hawk. Did something happen today that I should know about?”
My mind flashed back to the earlier bouts of dizziness. If I told Niall about that now, he might not go for the walk. “We can talk about it later,” I told him. “But there’s nothing you should be worried about.”
“That was evasive,” he commented, raising a brow and looking a bit more concerned.
I sighed. “Look, I will be fine,” I insisted. “There is no sense in you and the kids not having fun when I can just about guarantee that nothing is going to happen.” Granted, I didn’t have that much certainty, but I wasn’t going to let him know that. “Besides, I could use the alone time.” I added for good measure.
Niall frowned and held my gaze, studying me. “Fine. But we talk later.”
“Fine,” I said with a smirk. “Now, get ready to go.”
“Ooh, my shoes. They will take so long to put on,” he replied, not making any move to go elsewhere.
Niall was warm and smelled faintly of men’s soap. I know I probably should have pulled away, and part of me really wanted to sit, but standing against him was so calming. I lingered there, enjoying his warmth and his presence until we heard the kids coming down the stairs and he pulled away.
“See you soon,” he said, squeezing my arm. “No dying while we’re gone.”
I smiled. “I will try my best,” I assured as he made his way to the front door.
Once everyone had left, I let out a deep sigh. I felt lonely, like the warmth had left with Niall and the kids. I needed the rest, though. I quietly padded upstairs to put some pajamas on. Taking my clothes off felt freeing, but my muscles still groaned with the effort. The air was cold against my bare skin and I hurried into a pair of warm, fuzzy purple pajamas. I stretched my wings through the slits I had made in the top and yawned, glancing over at my bed.
Niall and the kids would be out for a while, and resting my eyes until they got back didn’t sound like too bad of an idea. I tossed my clothes in the hamper and crawled onto my bed. I only intended to close my eyes until everyone came back, but, as they say, the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. In a matter of minutes, I was fast asleep.
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