It’s been a month since Alicia came to visit, and things in most aspects of my life have been getting much better - I’ve made more friends (although I still eat lunch with Laurence, Jamie and Jackie).

I’m doing better in my classes, and I’ve only gotten two more panic attacks, and neither were as bad as the first one.

And, things between Laurence and I have been going pretty smoothly. We get on well and spend a lot of time with each other.

The only thing which hasn’t improved, is my amnesia. I haven’t remembered anything new since I started university, and I’m no longer even having dreams about my childhood.

Seems like the few memories I have now will be all the ones I get.

“Are you really not going?” I ask Laurence as we sit side by side on the sofa, drinking tea; our elbows bumping occasionally. He contemplates his answer for a moment.

“If you go, I’ll have to go to monitor you” I elbow him in the ribs. “Careful! I almost poured Earl Grey in my lap!” I giggle “sorry, I forgot you hadn’t finished your mug yet. And that’s besides the point - I don’t need monitoring.”

Laurence traces the pattern on his mug. “What if you have a panic attack? There’s gonna be lots of people there. Jamie and Jackie know practically everyone.”

I fiddle with my braid. “That’s a pretty solid argument. Frankly, I don’t give a shit what your reason for coming is, I just know it’s your best friends’ birthday and you can’t make up your mind whether you’re coming or not.”

I take a noisy sip from my mug. “Rude, really” I smirk at him and Laurence grits his teeth, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. 

“You’re such an ass, my God” we stare at each other in silence for a moment, then both burst out laughing.

“Why is it so hard to keep a straight face around you, Laurence!” I continue giggling into my mug, despite it being empty now. His smirk grows. “There’s nothing straight about either of us, Asher.”

I roll my eyes “you’re as bad as my sisters, they both make that same shitty joke all. The. Time. And it’s still shitty.” He chuckles and places his mug on the coffee table.

“Oh come on, it’s a classic!” I roll my eyes at him again. He turns to me. “Did you know, every time you roll your eyes, you lose a brain cell?” My mug joins his.

“Must be why I have approximately three left then.”

Laurence laughs and pulls me closer to him, placing his arm around my bag and fiddling with my braid. The braid he plaited this morning.

“We appear to have gotten rather sidetracked. I do believe we were talking about Jamie and Jackie’s party?” I nod, feeling the heat in my face and my galloping heart.

“Yep; so, are you coming or not?” Please come. I don’t want to go on my own. I’d never admit that out loud though; it’d give Laurence too much satisfaction.

He exhales, sinking slightly lower in his seat. “Yeah, sure, why not. Might as well, and Jay would be sad if I skipped, even if he pretends to be indifferent.”

I slap his thigh playfully, resting my head on his shoulder “good good, it’s next weekend so we better let them know you’re coming too.”

Laurence locks eyes with me and smiles “I’ll let them know later. For now; I want to enjoy drinking tea and cuddling on the sofa, if you don’t mind” Oh fuck. He’s such a dork and I love it.

“I’m a pretty great cuddler, if I do say so myself” I grin and lean into him more. Laurence in turn pulls me closer and smiles shyly, his ears tinged pink. “That you are.”