DANGEROUS ELYSIUM

PART ELEVEN

OLIVER

"Evening...Uncle Curtis." I said around a yawn as I walked into his large open plan kitchen.

"Hey, son. How are you feeling?"

"Tired. Long journey's do that," It was well after dinner by the time I got to my uncles and to get him to sit down long enough to have a conversation. He'd insisted on cooking a huge meal for supper while I’d gotten my things unpacked in my room on the second floor. "Food smells so good."

"Well, you look like you've not eaten a decent meal in weeks. Did you finish unpacking?"

"Yeah." My room was exactly like I'd left it. There were signs and posters of various famous scientists all over the wall, and several of the model planes that Uncle Curtis and I had put together when I'd spent weekends at my uncle’s house were still hanging from the ceiling. I’d been glad to find that there was indeed internet within the house too, though it was slower than I would've liked. But while my uncle had been putting together my favorite meal, his self-proclaimed "almost famous" chicken pot pie, I’d been checking emails and following up on some work from school. Although it was the last thing I wanted to do, I had to until I applied for uni here or the one a town over.

"So, are you going to tell me why you're here now and not at school?"

I knew he'd ask, he had the right to. He helped me pay for my school fees, but I'm not sure what I should tell him. I'm not sure if he'd accept the truth or believe any lies. So I opted with telling a white lie. "I'm just having a hard time being alone." It was almost a white lie.

"Alone? You always sounded happy when I spoke to you about school." That's because I'm a liar.

"Well, yeah," I stuttered and rubbed my hand over my sticky neck. "I mean I was happy with learning. But other than that I was totally alone and I didn't like it."

"Son…" My uncle started to say, until he saw the longing look I most probably had all over my face. "Alright, now that you're here you can help out with the horses. But you will go back to school. It's what your mother wanted for you and honestly, it's nice seeing that someone in the family has the brains to go far in life."

"I may have the brains Uncle Curtis, but I don't have the will like I used to. I guess city life sucked that right out of me."

"Cities, they are hit or miss son. You either do well or you don't. We'll get you into the uni here. Be around more relaxed people. God only knows how they rush about in those big cities, you don't have the need for that here."

My Uncle is right. Cities are a big fast growing metropolitan utopias that are for people who have either been born in them or are able to adjust in them. I'm neither. I tried, but try as I might I simply couldn't exist there, not anymore….not ever to be exact. "I'd like that, to both. How are the horses?"

"Great son, Max fathered two fouls this year. They'll be prize winning ones too."

I smiled looking at my Uncle Curtis. He's a proud man and horses were his pride. I've never really been a horse kind of guy, but I've never hated them. I just….enjoyed learning from books rather than riding horses. Then I wondered. "Erm, do you still see Ethan?"

"Ethan….oh yes. His father passed away four months ago and he's taken over his ranch."

"Oh, shit," I've never had many friends in my life, only Sharna and Raine who I thought was my friend. But whenever I came here for visits I did get on with Ethan. He's smarter than he lets on, because being smart didn't always sit well in this small town unless it was horse smart or cattle smart, not book smart. "I should go see him….do you think I should go see him? It's been a long time."

"He did ask about you, can't remember when it was. Might have been on your last visit during spring break."

"He did?"

"He's a good guy. He's toughed it out for a while, so maybe you should. I think he'd like that."

"Maybe I will, tomorrow or the day after. Not sure."

"You've always been so indecisive. Ever since you were a little boy," I laughed a little. But as kind hearted as my uncle was, he was also as stubborn as a mule. Not that I really knew what a mule was or how it differed from a donkey. It was just another one of my grandmother's expressions. "One day you wanted to ride horses, the next you were doing math," he chuckled a little and it warmed me. "You're better at math, son." That's another thing about my Uncle, he always referred to me as son. Ever since my mom passed away he's treated me like a son and not a nephew, I loved and really appreciated it. "Dinner is ready and I hope you have room for apple pie, It's your mom's recipe. I don't make it as good as her, but I'm betting she’d approve."

"You know she would."

"Good. Go clean up and I'll have it all dished up and ready."

"Sure, thanks." My uncle gave me a quick nod and I left the kitchen to go wash up. I felt like I was actually finally home. I hadn't felt like this for a long time and considering what's happened in a few short days I'm surprised I was still standing. That day I went up to the place me and Sharna used to bike to. I was going to just throw myself off the cliff edge. I thought about that, letting it all go and not coming back up for breath, because what's the point in breathing when each breath just hurts worse than the last. Yet I didn't in a million years think that I'd see Sharna there, of all places he was and I guess a deeper part of me was happy too. But now I knew what it would be like being here and not there. Possibly like a daily recovery and nightly withdrawal. Which would be odd because we only ever spent one night together. No sex. Just what happened in the shower. Then he cuddled me all night. My first real taste of Sharna and my last. I'd never forget it, but I will move past it. I'll move past it all, that's all I can do. Now.

After washing my hands and face and changing into a thin T-shirt and sweats I headed back downstairs to hear an unfamiliar voice or was it familiar? It sounded a little rough around the edges, like the person had just started getting over a cough. Then as I made my way into the kitchen the voice matched the face. "Oh hey Oliver, Ethan came over. What a surprise." My uncle said and smiled.

"Ethan?" Did I conjure him up talking about him?

"Oliver….right, sorry for disturbing you," he said with a partial smile, before turning back to my uncle. "I was hoping to talk to you about Max. I know it's late but I was driving past and thought I'd pop in real quick. I'm going to be really busy for a few days straight and one of my fathers mares is ready for breeding."

"Sure sure. We can talk over dinner, there's plenty to go around." Then uncle Curtis looked straight at me as if he needed my approval.

"There is a lot of food." I said and sat at the table. I watched Ethan for a moment. He's filled out since I last saw him. Bigger, stronger looking and he had rough stubble on his sun kissed face. A lot of guys that lived around here looked tanned from constantly being in the sun and admittedly it looked good on Ethan.

"Right. Are you sure?" My uncle nodded and pulled out the chair nearest to me. "Thanks," I felt Ethan's gaze shift to me. He actually looked kind of cute. Same warm gray eyes. "It's been awhile. How are you?" He asked, getting comfortable.

"I'm fine. You look….bigger." Oh my god! Did I just say that?

"Well I've been working a lot."

"I'm sorry about your dad." I sighed and shook my head. God I'm such an idiot.

"Thanks, but no need for sorry Oliver. We were….I guess prepared for it. He'd been sick for quite some time."

"Oh, right…." Shit. I know how to put my foot in it and it didn't feel nice.

"Come on boys, lighten up and enjoy my food. I'm just going to make a quick call. So eat up, it's here," My uncle said, and pointed to the food now on the table. "I'll be back shortly then we'll talk about Max."

"Thanks Curtis," Ethan said and grabbed a plate. I couldn't stop staring at him. He didn't seem upset or indifferent, considering I just mentioned his dad. "Are you eating?"

"Oh yeah, sorry…." Then he started chuckling. "What?" Seriously, what is it with guys laughing at me?

"Nothing."

"Yeah there is, what is it?"

"It's just been so long. Every time you come here I always seem to miss you. You still a huge geek?"

I snorted and grabbed a plate. "I've never been a geek."

"You have."

"So what if I am." God I was being so petty.

Then he laughed again. "Lots of the men who call this town home think they have to be someone different than who they really are. You never have." His words felt nice on the ears and warm in my chest.

"I guess."

Then we ate in silence for a minute before Ethan said between bites. "You gonna be here long?"

"Yeah. I am."

"That's great."

"Hey...erm, while I am here and not busy and also when you're not busy, wanna teach me to ride a horse?" I asked. As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I realized how ridiculous they sounded. How stupid and childish I sounded.

But Ethan laughed again. A cheerful laugh. "You just remember that you are the one who asked." He winked at me and took a big bite of his food. I didn't know what his words of warning meant, but I did know one thing. For the first time since crossing the Eden town line, I was really glad to be back here.