Erien was feeding his cockatoo on his shoulder as Lunar sat across on two cushions. Erien had apologized that there wasn’t a couch and that he broke his last set of chairs. Anger, huh. Lunar was watching as the young male scratched the bird’s head before he turned and looked.
“Sorry again about no chairs. I plan to get ew ones soon.”
“Ew ones?’ Lunar gave a puzzled expression. Erien blushed looking away to bump nose to beak with his bird. Lunar smiled with a chuckle.
“Don’t laugh at me! I have trouble speaking okay? I hate it, makes me sound stupid.”
“No, it’s cute.”
Both of them sat in silence for a while. Aitne flying back and forth between Lunar and Erien for head rubs and food. Erien got up and placed Aitne in his cage, draping the blanket over it and sat back down. He wrapped his arms around his legs, resting his chin on his knees.
“I guess we can talk now. My pets always have to have first say in meeting new people though.”
Lunar nodded, leaning forward some and rested his hands on the mini table between them,” Start from the beginning. Who is that guy?”
“Cassius Ty. He was,” Erien picked at the fringe from the holes in his jeans, avoiding any eye contact with the purple-haired male,” more of just a mess around buddy but it ended up being a relationship. From what you probably know, it wasn’t a healthy one. But that was years ago. But he came back, somehow finding me.”
Erien’s eyes glazed over to the sliding window that had a broken lock on it. Lunar followed to it, nodding slowly indicating he was listening. Erien continued on, explaining how the abuse started.
Cassius had enjoyed the controlling role in the relationship since that’s how Erien liked it. Having to be dominated even in a non-sexual way was pleasing and felt docile, but as time went on, one little, even innocent, disobey Cassius would hit. It didn’t matter what or where. The hits ended up turning into more slaps across the face more than once a day. Sometimes just if Cassius felt like it. Yet he never hit more than would be to make bruises and cuts to appear. Surprisingly.
Sometimes even the abuse would be sexual if he thought hitting wasn’t good enough or would please him, himself as the punisher. It would turn into pain after a while, Erien explained. Having to cut off any sort of harming kink. Whether blade of bare hand like one.
“Which sucked since I’m a freak for stuff like that,” Erien tugged at the earbuds wire around his neck that seemed just a little too tight for anyone. Choking kink it seemed.
“So I left him. Too some time to get over it, not that I’m fully over it anyway. Clearly not anymore I guess since it happened again, just, hm…” Erien stood up and walked to the kitchen, grabbing two apple juice bottles and two bottles of water and placed them on the table,” So now I kind of stay awake all night. Until I can get my patio door lock fixed. Sometimes my friend drops down from his window above and sits with me or stays over and sleeps so I can sleep.”
“That’s good. You do need sleep. You have a job, a life really. Plus your health is important.”
Erien snorted at Lunar’s confirmation about his health, smiling as he played with the cap to the apple juice. Lunar smiled gently,” You know I am right about that. I can tell you don’t care but even you care at some points right?”
Erien looked at him quietly. His tongue stuck out just a bit before he looked down as smiled , shaking his head slowly. For the moment Lunar almost believed him. There was no other sign of Erien saying he cared about his health or not. That how he was living and being were just how it was and it would be that way.
“I really don’t care. No one else does unless it benefits them. So why should I? I am not a tool to be used for self boosting.” Erien stood up and walked around the table, looking at Lunar,” Very little scares me. But the very little that does scare me, it scares me more than anything. That’s why I try to avoid them, and it’s very easy. Being alone makes you numb. Makes you stronger. Makes you invincible to a lot.” Lunar was quiet, just watching. Erien pointed, his index finger pressing to the older male’s forehead, the press sure going to leave a dot.
“I have a small number of people I trust. And soon that will get smaller and smaller until I’m left with one to even none. And that’s okay. People say to always just look for yourself anyway. You can’t always rely on others for everything and anything.”
“Erien, everyone needs to rely on someone. Even if not all the time. That’s just common sense. Yes, we can do things in our own majority of our lives, but loneliness happens, and we as people need to fill that with people.”
“I have animals.”
“You can’t always rely on them. They don’t function like us.”
Erien frowned, more of a childish pouting. Lunar stood up and placed a hand on his head, ruffling his hair to make it messier than it was. Erien grumbled,” Well, they are sure as hell nicer and better company than lousy people who try to be all logical and realistic. This is why people like you suck sometimes. Too much realisticness. The world lacks creativity. Fun. Imagination. Bleh. You old people are boring.”
Lunar’s once genuine smile was now strained into an irritated pained one. Erien noticed and smirked mischievously,” I think I see a few white hairs as it is. Oh no.” More tension on Lunar’s face as he struggled not to wack this kid before him for his mouth. He was enjoying the irritation that was too visible now.
Erien started to laugh as he shook his head, bending over to hold his stomach and rest an arm on his leg,” You are such a hard-ass! Come on I’m kidding. Nothing to get so irritated about. Any more of that, all the wrinkles and frown lines will really make you look old now!”
“Same goes to you, Erien,” Lunar rested the laughter into silence. Erien leaned up, looking dully now. How fast he switched startled Lunar. Damn, too fast that emotion switch was.
“Shut up. Don’t talk to me about that like that. I am fine. I don’t have ageing lines because of stress and whatever else. Just eye shadows from little lack of sleep. That’s all.”
A subtle nod to that was all that was given. Erien was still blank, but the dullness in his eyes faded to a brighter look as he looked away mumbling to himself. Sounded like a self-blame for how he spoke.
“Thanks for coming over. Again. I’m sorry.” Erien walked Lunar to the front door and opened it, aiding him out and smiled waving and closing the door. Lunar stopped it with his foot as pushed it back open, embracing Erien which startled the brunette male. Sure enough, Lunar didn’t let go.
“Thank you for even talking to me. I thought you were going to rip my head off the first time. You have a scary look.”
Erien nodded and hugged him back, patting slightly because he didn’t know what to do from the sudden holding. Lunar didn’t let go though. Neither a suffocation situation. Erien didn’t know what to do but just held at this point, it felt kinda nice. He knew this hug was genuine. Mainly from the suddenness from the door being stopped and him pushing it back open to embrace.
Erien relaxed slowly and managed to pull away from the tight suffocation and push Lunar back out the door,” Okay okay I get it now. You care about me. You are worried about me. I get it now. But please don’t lose your damn head over it! I can survive on my own! I can handle myself. Bye-Bye Mister Salvatore!”
“I know but Erien you have to-” Erien slammed the door closed, staring at the wooden rectangle that was now a wall between him and the nightclub owner. He sighed, running his fingers through his fluffed and messed up locks as he stepped back slowly and flowed back onto the cushions his guest was sitting on.
Jeez, he thought as Erien looked around, his honey hues landing on the blocked off patio doors so getting in or out was impossible. He smiled and laughed to himself, laying back. The thought that some night club owner cared was funny, mainly because the whole situation was ironic in its own way. But whatever, another thought flowed in.
➼
Lunar stood outside the doorway, hearing the muffled laughter anyway. He smiled softly, stepping away and walked off.
“Silly.”
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