My next class was the same as my third core surprisingly, this class was basically a study hall. My third core we were reading a book about a time of slavery from a young girls POV. I was exhausted so i was half way falling asleep the whole class.

After that, i had to go home, obviously. Walking. around trying to find my bus was sort of difficult. I wasn't really excited to go home cause we had no wifi and i really didn’t want to deal with my mom and brother arguing and then taking it out on me.

I get on the bus and this kids are still being loud. Not that i don’t expect them to be, but because i have a throbbing headache, and i’m tired. We also end up going to the high school to pick up the highschoolers. The boy from this morning sits next to me. He starts talking about how it would be funny if we ‘dated’. Oh god, how do i tell him i’m not interested? “I’m not allowed to date sorry-“ I said. He then proceeded to push it saying my mom didn't have to know. He’s either persistent or desperate. Maybe a mix of both. We arrive at my stop. “No sorry.” I say and walk off the bus. I hear some kids laugh at him and tell him he got rejected. I kinda feel bad but i was super uncomfortable and just wanted to go home. As i’m walking home i get a random wave, probably the air. But i had a bad feeling. Normally my bad feelings are spot on, though theres moments where they are wrong.

I arrive at my apartment and jiggle the nob. Mom should be home now and i don't have a key yet. She opens the door. It looks like shes been crying. “Whats wrong?” i say to her. “The cops took your brother out of school today, he’s going to be put in a detention center..i failed as a mother.” She said. I got some sort of wave over me again, kinda empty. Kinda sad. Me and my brother have always been close, since we were little that is. He’s always been someone i’ve tried to help and look up too, and always someone who has protected me. Hearing this did damage enough, but hearing my own mom call herself a failure was pretty painful too.

I hug her. I’m not sure what else to do. “You didn’t fail. He did this to himself” i say quietly. All she does is cry. I want to cry but i don't cry in front of my family. They use it against me later on when i’m at a gathering with them, or just in general. Mom has a habit of getting into one of her moods and utterly degrading me down. I thought it was normal til i visited a friends last year. Her mom was so loving.

I went upstairs and decided to do my homework. I had nothing better to do anyways. I don't really have internet either so i can’t cheat. Its all too complicated for my brain. It’s moving a mile a minute and it won’t slow down. I miss my brother. He would always help me with my homework, mom doesn’t understand any of my work. New system from when she was my age and new equations.

After all of this, I feel drained. I go up to my bunk and sleep. I’m too sad to function anymore today, and i don’t want it to affect mom. I don’t want pity. I just want sleep.