I remember waking up the first day of school, the first morning of my new school. I was mildly exhausted from staying up all night, really anxious, excited to escape the bullies and teasers from my old school.
I wanted to pretend to be someone, not some weird girl who looks sad all the time, i wanted to be liked. I got up and put on the most basic thing i could find that i own (a gray long sleeved shirt with jeans) and i attempted to do makeup, figuring i couldn't do anything fancy, i put on mascara and called it a day.
“Your bus is 181” Mom told me before i left the house, she had to go to work so she was also in a rush. “Wheres the bus stop?” I asked her, confused cause i’m new to buses, Ive always walked to school. She told me it was the first entrance to the apartments, naturally i was still confused. I walked out the door anyways, and started walking up the road. I get to the bus stop and there were a few kids there, a tall girl, who was on the phone with someone, and a boy with glasses. He walks up to me and asks me if i'm new, i respond with “yes” as if it wasn't obvious that i had never seen him once in my life before. Our conversation ended quickly, i had no interest in him cause he was weirding me out. Fast forward to about 30-45 minutes later, a group of kids were at the bus stop, and the bus was starting to pull up. I got on the bus and began the ride to school.
The boy had sat next to me, i found him weird and creepy, he asked me if i knew a girl named Zarina, coincidentally, i did. She is my cousin on my stepdads side. We talked about that for awhile, a few stops go by and i see someone get on the bus and everyone immediately started picking on him, i remember thinking “i don't like any of you” because they were making fun of his appearance.
About an hour later, we get to the school, my anxiety was shooting through the roof, i felt as if i’d puke. I stood up and walked off the bus. I seriously thought i was gonna puke everywhere i was so nervous.
I walked into the cafeteria, by following other students of where to go. I see many kids, I sit down at an empty cafeteria table, i don't want to embarrass myself by sitting with random people. I look around, figuring out where i’d fit in with, naturally, i couldn't tell, my old school had called this one scary, and terrifying and had bad rumors everywhere about it, being a so called “gang school” but all i saw we’re normal teenagers everywhere.
The bell rings, confused i stand up and go to a teacher, asking them where to go, saying i was new. One of the teachers had gotten the counselor to show me around, walking around the school see all the classes, it was confusing but i felt new and refreshed. “A new start” i thought, and indeed it was a new start.