“Hmm,” Ren stood with his arms crossed at the bottom of the tall red mountain. An opening into the side of the rocky face loomed ominously in front of him. “So, this is where the Infinity Ring might be.”

A screen popped up in front of his face as he neared the entrance. It read: Marvelous Mountain Dungeon. Recommend party six players. Average monster level 90 plus. Average Monster attributes fire. Current clear time record three hours and fifty-two minutes held by guild Rockstars.

“Hmm, hmm. I see. I see.” Ren pulled a potion from his inventory bag and drank it. When the bottle was empty, it shattered and disappeared. The potion gave him fire resistance for one hour. “Hmm, that should be plenty of time.”

While he was at it, he took an all-elements resist ring from his bag and equipped to his hand. The ring would help dampen any elemental attacks on top of his potion boost. It was broken by all gaming standards, but since he’d won it fair and square by clearing ten of the hardest raids in under four days, no one could say anything about it. He sauntered into the dungeon and found it too dark to see. “Night vision.”

After activating his spell, the dark cave walls and rocky floor became clear as day as he continued into the dungeon. He expected the walls to be damp, but maybe from being a fire dungeon, he didn’t see any moisture on the walls. As he reached the end of the cavern, he spotted a large red lizard sitting on a boulder. Its hide was thick and cracked with bumps running along its skin. Every time it opened its mouth, a small puff of fire would come out. Its gaming tag identified it as Fire Lizard level 92. Since Ren was moving without light, the creature didn’t spot him right away. You would think a creature that lives in a dark cave would have night vision… Sometimes I wonder if the game creators put much thought into certain functions. It’s like they were rushed and on a tight deadline, so they just used the most basic design to finish.

Ren sighed and held up his staff. It glowed an icy blue on the end of its wooden tip. “Frost.”

The lizard froze and fell off the boulder to the ground. Without fear, he walked over to the giant lizard and tapped it with his staff. “Death.”

The monster let out a horrible screech then vanished. A black screen with white lettering popped up, showing he’d gained three thousand four hundred and twenty-three experience points.

“Cool, just another twenty-five million something points to level up.” Ren rolled his eyes and looked around the cavern. There was nothing else there, as if to say it was a dead end. He chuckled at the silliness that the game creators thought they might stop him with such a cheap trick. Ren turned to the boulder and held up his staff to it. “Shatter.”

The boulder broke into multiple pieces, revealing a staircase leading upward. Ren ascended and continued into the dungeon. When he made it to the second floor, he paused as he saw the slew of monsters blocking the corridor. There were more fire lizards, orcs, and fire goblins all level 90 and above.

“Seriously? I don’t have time for this,” Ren held up his staff, annoyed, and shouted, “Ice Castle!”

Ice shot out from his staff, blooming like a giant flower. When the razor-sharp petals hit the walls, the petals burst and turned into vines that crept along the walls, covering them with a spiky layer of white. The monsters paused at this sudden development. A couple of them finally spied him and went on the attack. They took two steps toward him before the thorns on the ice vines grew in a split second and impaled them.

The monsters blocking his path screamed and perished as the massive spikes of ice stabbed them from all sides, piercing holes into their chests. Ren stood there tapping his foot as he waited for his spell to finish off the monsters in the hall. Finally, the screaming died down when the last monster died. A status screen popped up telling him how many experience points and lil he’d received from killing the monsters. He waved his hand and dismissed the screen.

“Who puts that many monsters on level two? What a shitty dungeon,” Ren muttered to himself as he continued onward. He looked at his mini map and saw that there was something off about one wall. “Probably either a trap or a secret room. Hmm, William didn’t say which level the ring was on, so I guess I have no choice.”

Ren walked over to the odd wall and touched it. It glowed a light blue, and the wall vanished. He walked into the empty side room and looked around. Immediately the ground rumbled underneath him and he felt gravity take hold. He fell into a deep, dark hole. He hit the bottom of the pit and let out a loud yelp as he took three thousand points of fall damage. When he sat up, he came face to face with a red baby dragon that was breathing hot breath into Ren's face. Ren was thankful that monsters didn’t really smell. The creators hadn’t added sent into the game.

“You don’t have the infinity ring, do you?” Ren asked. The dragon let out a roar and opened its mouth as if it planned on biting his head off. Ren sighed and lightly tapped the dragon with his staff. “Death.”

The baby dragon let out a screech and evaporated into dust. Ren stood up and brushed himself off as he chugged a health potion. Tapping his staff on the ground, he shouted, “Fly!”

Within seconds, he was out of the hole and back into the main hallway.

“Well, that was a bust. At least give me some treasure for surviving your un-survivable trap you shitty game creators.” Ren ranted at the ceiling as he continued on to the third floor.

He groaned when he noticed that there were even more monsters on this level. Raising his staff, he kept blasting Ice Castle annihilating all the monsters in his path while simultaneously downing mana potion after mana potion. The third floor had two trap rooms, and the fourth floor had four trap rooms, but none of the rooms had any loot.

“What the heck is up with this dungeon! Shitty, stupid, can’t get laid game creators!” Ren growled at the ceiling while shaking his fist. Arrows suddenly rained down from the ceiling, and he dove out of the way to dodge them. He looked up at the trap and paused. Did they hear me? It’s not my fault you can’t get laid, ok? Not like I can either…

Ren pushed the depressing real-world thoughts out of his head and continued on. By the end of the fifth floor, he was getting bored. The fifth floor contained monsters starting at level 102. They lasted maybe half a millisecond each. Sitting down for a moment on a random bolder, he took out a cookie from his bag and ate it. The sweetness hit his mouth and helped restore some of his mood. If only I could eat like this in real life and not gain weight. Perked up, he stood back up and looked at the end of the hall where a large opening waited for him. When he sauntered in, he found himself face to face with a massive fire dragon that took up most of the colosseum sized room. Smoke emitted from the dragon’s nostrils and mouth. Its large crimson cat eyes locked onto Ren. The dragon had a name: Rolick the Destroyer. Level 130.

“Well, hello Rolick,” Ren greeted the dragon politely with a bow and it roared at him. “How rude.”