Noah is frozen and silent for a long moment, his face blank with shock.

I’m standing there grinning at him like an idiot, so when he finally seems to remember where he is, I expect him to groan, tell me to fuck off.

Instead, he catches my eye and grins just as big - bigger, actually. It’s such an absurdly huge, stupid, self-satisfied, over the top grin that I burst out laughing, and take Noah down with me.

I’ve never heard him laugh quite like this. It reminds me of how Aiden sounds in those rare moments when he manages to forget everything but his happiness. His laughter after we saved Gabby, after I told him I love him.

Noah sounds like that, right now.

He realizes, and quickly puts a hand over his mouth. Supposedly just to rub his face, but his eyes are shining, lunar in their bright grey glow.

“Fuck,” he sputters. “Jesus Christ.”

He sags back against the counter, his fingers pressed to his lips. He seems really happy, but it also looks like he’s having trouble getting a full breath into his lungs.

“You alright?” I ask.

“Yeah, yeah, I just…” His eyes are still very wide. “Didn’t expect…”

“Didn’t Mel and Raj both tell you it was cool?”

“I was - worried that maybe…” Noah lets out a helpless laugh. “Forget it. Don’t know how to explain.”

He doesn’t have to. I understand. Noah is so used to having his voice stifled and drowned out, his needs ignored. When someone offers him something he wants, he’s perplexed, and he makes no move to reach out and take it. He’s looking for the catch, the unforeseen problem, the lie covering up the nasty truth. He was worried about Raj, his true feelings on the matter.

But Melanie, much like Raj, has no compunctions about kicking down the barriers that stand between Noah and his happiness. Those two will do whatever it takes to make Noah understand that he doesn’t have to go unfulfilled any longer.

This time, there is no catch. They’ll get him to understand that, too.

Raj chooses this moment to slip into the kitchen, and Noah suddenly pales, starts kneading his palm.

“Hi,” Raj says brightly. “Oh - hey, Jamie!”

“Hey, man,” I call back, glancing at Noah, whose massive grin has disappeared.

Raj pauses. His brown eyes linger on Noah’s expression, then dart to his phone, still abandoned on the floor.

“What happened?” Raj’s smile falls away, too. “Noah? Are you okay?”

“Melanie just kissed him for the first time,” I answer. “I think he’s still in shock.”

Noah blanches and twists to look at me, wounded and betrayed, as if I just ratted on him. He opens his mouth, about to argue with me. Nothing comes out, and he swivels to face Raj instead, struggling for an explanation.

“Oh, is that what happened?” Raj’s worried frown reverts back to a smile, and he laughs. “I get it. Had the same face on when she did that to me.”

Noah looks searchingly at Raj, fidgeting nervously with his lip piercing. Raj goes to him, gives him a playful pinch on the arm.

“Shit, man, I was worried that something was wrong,” he says.

Noah blinks at him, uncertain. "Nothing's wrong."

It comes out sounding more like a question than an answer, but Raj nods, relieved.

“Good. I thought that Ralph called, or something.” His expression darkens. “That guy is asking for a licking if he tries to bust back into your life, Noah, I hope he knows.”

“From you, Raj?” I laugh. “You’re such a cupcake, I can’t picture you laying hands on someone.”

Noah looks at Raj, warm affection showing around his obvious nerves.

“That’s true,” he says, cracking a grin. “You and Jamie would make the worst team in a brawl, dude. Team Cupcake.”

“Good thing we’ve got you two delinquents looking out for us,” Raj laughs, nodding at Aiden, who has just reappeared in the kitchen doorway. “Although - I’ve never actually met Scary Aiden. Maybe he’s not all that bad?”

Aiden levels his blue stare on Raj’s face. “Oh, no?”

Aiden’s expression is perfectly neutral, but when Raj meets his gaze, he starts blinking rapidly, and leans so far back that his shoulders flatten against Noah’s. Noah catches him, suppressing a laugh.

“Dear God!” Raj presses a hand over his heart, his eyes widening. “Stop it, Aiden! Holy fucking - okay, enough, I get it!”

Aiden lets out a soft snicker, and Noah breaks, laughing too. His arms are closed around Raj, but the moment he realizes what he's doing, he lets him go and starts to back away.

“Where are you going, man?” Raj whips around and seizes his arm, holding him in place. “You’re supposed to back me up if there’s a scrap!”

“You’re saying that it would somehow be a good idea for me to cuddle you in that scenario, dude? You honestly think that would help with anything?”

“Well, it would help me,” Raj sputters.

Noah tries to scoff, but he ends up laughing again, gives up his efforts to twist his arm free from Raj’s grasp. Aiden catches my eye, and we exchange a covert little grin.

Melanie steps back into the kitchen, her car keys in her fingers and her purse on her shoulder. She stops in the doorway, taking in the situation with one eyebrow arched. Raj - who was still clinging to Noah - straightens up immediately, but fails to hide the alarm on his face.

“Um,” Melanie says.

“Hi, Mel,” I call. “Raj decided he wanted to meet Scary Aiden.”

Melanie’s eyes go back to Raj, and she lets out a sympathetic laugh.

“Raj, baby. I say make good choices, and you hear go get terrifying Aiden out of retirement?”

“I’d like to point out that all I did was look at him,” Aiden says, and Melanie clicks her tongue.

“Well, Aiden, to make up for scaring my fiancé half to death, you can help him move that heavy dresser upstairs. Raj and Noah can’t do it alone. I think it’s got to be one of them and you.”

“Hey, no, we can do it,” Noah argues. “We don’t need Aiden, we just need to give it one more try.”

Melanie makes a skeptical face. “Twentieth time’s the charm, I guess?”

“We did not try twenty times!” Raj protests. “It was like, five times.”

“Yeah, or ten,” Noah adds. “Not twenty.”

“Right.” Raj points to Noah. “Fifteen, max.”

“Okay!” Melanie laughs. “Enough, I don’t even care. I’m going to lunch with Dahlia, so you boys figure it out.” She crosses to the fridge, extracts her water bottle, and turns to Raj and Noah. “You two be good, keep an eye on Nik. I’ll be back soon.”

Raj bends to give her a kiss goodbye, and she bounces onto her toes to accept it.

Noah is by Raj’s side, and he stuffs his hands into his pockets, glancing away. Melanie’s eyes flit to him. She considers for a moment, then leaves him be and turns towards the door.

Noah steals a look at Raj, then at Melanie. Something sparks in his eyes.

Mel is already walking away, but Noah’s tattooed hand flashes out. He catches a handful of her dress, just below her ribs.

It’s loose, floor-length, with lots of folds and fabric. As a result, Melanie doesn’t realize that anything happened until she’s a few feet away, when her dress suddenly pulls tight against her, stopping her. She glances over her shoulder, confused.

I can tell by Noah’s eyes that he’s nervous, but he breaks into a devious smile, anyways. He starts pulling on the scarlet fabric, dragging Melanie back to him.

“Hey!” she laughs, her socked feet slipping on the kitchen floor. “Noah!”

Raj gets the idea, and he grabs himself a handful of Melanie’s dress. Together, he and Noah bring Melanie sliding back towards them until she twists around and stumbles into Noah.

He catches her, steadies her out.

“You idiot!” she giggles, her hands spread on his chest. “Are you-?”

Noah bends and brushes a kiss onto her mouth, cutting her off. Melanie stops still, then lifts a hand to rest on his cheek.

It’s a quick one, just like the kiss she shared with Raj, but she stares up at Noah after he breaks it off.

“Have fun with Dahlia,” he says warmly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

Melanie smiles, pins her lip between her teeth, doesn’t answer. She turns, her cheeks pink, and heads for the door.

“Bye Jamie, bye Aiden!” she calls, and we both wave at her before she heads out.

Noah sneaks a hasty glance at Raj, then blinks in surprise when he finds Raj smiling at him. They look at each other, speaking with their eyes, and - Noah smiles, too.

Raj turns back to us, clearing his throat.

“Well, Aiden, you want to help me move that dresser? Noah and I can’t do it. We tried like, fifty times. Maybe more.”

"I swear it was taunting us," Noah groans, tipping his head back. "The fucking thing weighs more than the Titanic."

“Let’s go,” Aiden rumbles. He's already on the move, stretching out his arms, loosening up.

Raj gives Noah’s shoulder a quick squeeze before he follows after Aiden. Noah watches him go, then places his palms on the counter, leans into them.

His grey eyes flick to me, so I come to stand next to him, lean back against the counter, and settle my arms over my chest.

There must be some kind of expression on my face, because Noah laughs, then groans.

“Please.” He puts his fingers to his temples, closing his eyes. “Don’t-”

“Oh, whatever, dude, I’m allowed to be happy for you!” I give him a nudge with my elbow, smiling widely. “So? You’ve had a day of this now, how are you feeling?”

“Feel like…” Noah shakes his head, drops his hands back to the counter. “I still can’t believe it, man. That they both want to be with me like that. I feel like I tricked them, somehow. Even though I’m just - being myself.”

I think of what Raj said to me at the diner. How he wishes that Noah could see himself the way that he sees him, or the way that Melanie does.

“As long as you’re being sincere with them, you don’t have to worry about that, Noah,” I answer.

He doesn’t respond, so I add: “It must have felt good, though, right? To hear that the feeling goes both ways? With both of them?”

Noah lets out a soft laugh, running a hand over his mouth.

“When I actually got my head around it, it was like…” He fades off, searching for the right words. “You remember the place that Aiden told us about, in Mexico? Where the sun would rise over the mountaintops, and all the birds would start singing at the same time?”

“Mhm?”

Noah nods slowly, smiling to himself.

“Felt like that,” he says, with magnesium eyes. “Like everything started singing at once.”

~~~~

After the chaotic, near-miss rescue we made yesterday, the magnetic current between myself and Aiden is even stronger than usual. We can’t seem to keep our hands off of each other.

We’re both still kind of tired, but we end up lazily making out in my sunlit bed as soon as we get back to my apartment.

The heat of Aiden’s body melts into mine through all of the places where we’re pressed together. I’m on top of him, my knees deep in the mattress, one hand up his shirt. Lost in the taste of his tongue, the solid warmth of him, the vetiver emanating from his clothes, his skin. Free-floating in a blissful haze.

Aiden’s fingertips rest gently on the nape of my neck. He drifts them in slow, featherlight circles as I kiss him.

A stripe of bright sunshine falls onto my back and across Aiden’s face. When I draw slightly away, his eyes flutter open and catch the light. I stop, staring down at him, my heart tripping over itself.

“I love you,” I murmur, tracing my knuckles down his cheek.

Aiden breathes out a soft huff of laughter. He turns his face into my hand and kisses my palm.

“I love you, too.”

I trail my thumb over his cheekbone, my feelings for him swelling up, sweeping over my head. I know exactly what Noah meant earlier. Everything started singing at once.

I'm beginning to understand just how badly I can’t afford to lose Aiden. My mind goes back to yesterday, what almost happened. The mere thought of Aiden vanishing beneath the ice makes me feel like I just took that cold plunge, myself.

“Hey,” I say softly, “You know how much you scared me, going after Matt like you did?”

Aiden’s smile fades, and he sits up on his elbows.

“I’m sorry.” His low voice is rough, pained. “But - that’s my covenant. I have to. You know that I have to.”

“You don’t have to. You didn’t do it, and we saved Matt, anyways.” I take Aiden’s chin in my fingers, gazing down into his eyes. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but... I think we need to use more of your magic when we do rescues. I mean - that's what it's for, right?”

Aiden stares up at me, then drops his gaze, unhappiness spreading over his face.

I can tell that he’s got something to say, that he’s looking for the right words. My heart fills with affection, watching this. Sometimes Aiden struggles so hard to say something that he doesn't realize he's already said it. That our secret language means I understand. Even without the connection, I can read his body, the change in his voice, the look in his sweet, anxious blue eyes.

I cup his face in my hands.

“You’re worried about controlling it. You don’t want to hurt anyone, or do something bad by accident, so you’d rather put yourself on the line. That’s it, isn’t it?”

Aiden bites the inside of his cheek, then nods. I tip forward, nuzzle my nose into his.

“You’re so much better than you give yourself credit for, Heliomancer. I’m telling you. Can you trust me?”

Aiden pulls a face at me. “Come on, you know that I trust you.”

“Then please try to trust me on this. I know it’s hard for you, but - please.”

He lets out an aggrieved sigh, then sits back on his elbows, contemplating.

“Can we keep it as a last resort?”

“We can, but not the last resort.” I put my forehead to Aiden’s, his chestnut hair mingling with the red strands of mine. “Just promise me that you won’t risk your life unless you’re sure that there are no other options. Magical or otherwise.”

Aiden takes another minute to think it over, then nods.

"Okay. I can do that."

I let out a heavy breath, warmth flooding back into my body.

I kiss him gratefully, my hands running over the broad span of his chest, then descending, sliding lower, finding the button of his jeans.

“Did that conversation turn you on, somehow?” he laughs, his breath a gentle rush against my lips.

“Mhm.” I take his zipper, give it a hard tug, and slip my fingers beneath the fabric. Answering fire flashes in Aiden’s eyes. “There’s nothing sexier than not plummeting to your premature death.”

Aiden snickers again, but then my hand goes deeper into his jeans, and his laughter melts into a soft, breathless sound, one that I cut off with my mouth on his.

That Aiden is down to even try using his magic more often, when it scares him so much... even if he wants to keep it as a last resort... that’s not nothing. Not for him.

I’m so proud of him.

My hand begins to move, teasing him, and though my bed is filled with warmth and sunlight, a shiver rolls through Aiden’s body. I let myself get lost in him, pulled into his gravity.

I know that one day, despite his promise, Aiden will be forced to put his own life on the line again. All the more reason to make every precious moment I have with him count.

And when that day comes, when he has to risk everything - I’ll be right where I belong, the place I could never imagine straying from.

By his side.