The next time Liam has to pick Caleb from his house, he is in a terrible mood. It’s one of those days when he is mad at the world. He stops the car in front of Caleb's house and immediately gets lost in his thoughts about breakfast.

He nearly jumps when the other boy joins him. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“No problems.”

Liam knows he should make conversation, but he can’t today. He just doesn’t feel like it. Caleb is quiet too. Then again, Caleb is always quiet.

Before he knows it, Liam is already parked in front of the school. He stops the engine and is about to get out of the car when Caleb gently puls his sleeve. Liam turns to look at the other boy, trying to ignore that his stomach might have gotten a butterfly or two when the other boy touched him.

“Are you okay?” Caleb asks.

In any other circumstances, if it had been anyone else, if it had been any other day, Liam would have said yes and gotten out of the car. They’re not friends. And even if they were, Liam isn’t the type of person to just blurt out his feelings. But Caleb genuinely looks concerned. He is not prying, he is not being polite, he is not looking for gossip. It looks like he genuinely cares.

“I just had a tough morning.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Liam looks at the clock. They are a bit early. “It’s nothing important.”

“It can’t be more plain than my slip in the stairs story.”

Liam smiles. Caleb just has this way to always make things easier. It’s soothing. He almost wishes that his brother would train more often. Although… if Adam hadn’t had training this morning, then the scene at breakfast wouldn’t have happened. “It’s just a bit hard, you know?”

“What is?”

“Being the disappointment of the family.”

“I’m sure you’re not.”

“I am, though. Adam is a successful athlete and Sam is the cute one. Plus she’s the girl.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“I don’t know. I’m just bitter today.”

“Hey. Adam is sporty. He’s nice. He’s popular. He’s a great friend. And Sam… I don’t know much about her other than she’s lovely and all three of your first names rhyme. But you… You’re smart, college scholarship kind of smart, you are kind – no, don’t make that face, you’re being my personal driver although I never did anything for you – you are interesting, you… I promise you, you are not a disappointment.”

“I am to my parents.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m gay.”

“Oh… sorry, I… Adam did mention something about that but I didn’t know it was this bad.”

“It’s fine. It’s just that usually, Adam is the buffer when we have conversations like these, but he wasn’t there this morning. And it hurts, you know? When your parents so profoundly wish for you to be different.”

“They’ll come around.”

“Eventually, maybe. But in the meantime, I have to deal with that at home, and then I come to school and… do you know what was written on my locker yesterday?”

“Yes, I heard from the guys at lunch.”

“It’s just a lot. I’ll be fine. I always am. I just need to be a bit grumpy today.”

“I get it. Why don’t you and Maisy join us for lunch today?”

“Why?”

“Because she doesn’t deserve to have lunch with no one but a grumpy best friend.”

Liam just loves that Caleb would care about him and his best friend like this. Finding a way to cheer both of them up.

Okay… maybe he shouldn’t use the word ‘love’ when he is thinking about Caleb because this is weird and confusing. He ‘really appreciates it’. That’s better.

“I’ll ask her,” Liam promises before finally getting out of the car.

*

Picking up Caleb is becoming Liam’s favorite time of the week. It’s just… they get on much better than Liam anticipated. Especially since that day Caleb invited him to lunch. It’s not just the fact that he saw he was upset and cared enough to ask him about it, it’s also the way Caleb totally changed his mind – and mood – when Liam and Maisy did join them for lunch. Sure, it helps that Liam is allowed to drive his brother’s car and that he can sleep later twice a week and get home earlier once a week, but… it’s mostly Caleb.

And that’s a bit confusing. Forbidden too, probably. A dead-end for sure.

It’s alright. Everyone has an impossible crush in high school, right? And at least, for now, it’s something in Liam’s life that makes him feel warm and happy rather than frustrated and angry. It is a very welcome change.

“I know you’re not going to practice at the moment,” Liam tells Caleb one morning as they are waiting at a red light. “But what about the swim-off? Do you want to go to that?”

Caleb turns his face slowly, eyes wide open in surprise, an amused but not mocking smile on his lips. “The what?”

“The swim-off, you know, on Thursday… It’s not called that, is it?”

Caleb’s smile widens ever so slightly and he shakes his head. “No.”

“But Adam said…” Wait… did Adam ever say that or did Liam come up with it and his brother just went along with it? “Adam never corrected me.”

“He probably just thought it was funny. I think I’ll only call them that from now on.”

Liam almost wants to ask him what the real word is, but he is a little embarrassed and he would like to change the subject swiftly.

“Do you want to go, then? You’re obviously not often in the audience, but you could sit with me and Maisie?”

“I’d like that. And maybe this time she won’t look so shocked whenever we talk to each other.”

“Will you talk though? Without the team around the table, it won’t really be your comfort zone.” Liam then realizes how it sounds. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean anything bad by it, I’m just… trying to understand.”

Caleb’s face is blank and he is looking straight ahead. Liam has no idea if he offended the other boy, or even made him uncomfortable. Either way, it’s not what he wanted.

“I’d like to say yes, but… I’m not the same when I am with Adam and when I am with the two of you.”

“You’re getting less silent in the car.”

Caleb shrugs. “Maybe I’m adding you to the list of people I’m comfortable around. But you’re right. Maisy might not be on it yet.”

“Then you can stay with Clara. I get it.”

“Clara is definitely not on my list. I mean, I like her, but…I’ve never really spoken to her that much either and never without Adam. So… if you don’t mind a silent me, I think I’d like to sit with you and Maisie.”

“Cool. Then we can ask our stupid questions to someone who can actually answer them.”

“Sure,” Caleb replies with a cheeky tone. “I’ll teach you all about swim-offs!”

*

It is after school and Liam parked the car in front of Caleb’s house. He stopped the engine so they could finish their conversation quickly, but that was almost an hour ago and the conversation is still going, livelier than ever.

Liam looks at his phone and is surprised that it is even later than he thought. “Adam is going to be home before me,” he comments.

“Sorry. See what happens when I get too comfortable with people? I can’t stop talking. I’m sure right now you’d like the shy version of me back, however pathetic.”

“The shy version of you is really endearing, actually. But I like this you better.”

“Because he’s less boring?”

“No. Because he’s the real you.”

Caleb’s cheeks get a little pink and Liam stands by what he said. Shy Caleb is extremely endearing. “Anyway. I should at least invited you in instead of making us stay in the car. I didn’t realize we would chat that long.”

“Honestly, don’t worry. This was fun.” Liam immediately regrets using the past. Because that implies he is saying goodbye and he would like to make the moment last just a little longer. So he adds, before Caleb can understand it as his cue to leave, “Besides we don’t really know each other that well. I get that it might be weird to invite me to your place.”

Caleb takes a moment to look at Liam before answering. “I don’t know. I’ve been to your house before and, sure, it was with your brother, but I think it wouldn’t be that much weirder to have you over. As for your other point… I know I haven’t really given you the chance to get to know me, but I know you.”

“Oh, you do, do you?” Lia asks, knowing that Caleb is just being polite.

“Probably better than you think.” When Liam doesn’t react, Caleb adds: “I never really talked to you but I heard everything you told your brother in the car. I remember all the things he mentioned about you.”

“If it’s only based on my relationship with my brother, it’s probably not very flattering.”

“You two get along better than any of you is willing to let on. Anyway. I’ll let you go now.”

Liam nods and is left wondering after Caleb leaves. Is Caleb overconfident about what he knows about Liam, or is it Liam who has not been paying attention to the other boy all this time? And… that thing between them… is it just friendship? It feels like more, but it’s probably just coming from Liam. Right?

*

This is the last time Liam is picking Caleb up, and… it’s weird. It feels like saying goodbye. They will still see each other at least twice a day, but it will be different. It’s always different when Adam is around. These four weeks went on so quickly. But the cast is coming off during break and when they come back to school, although he has to take things slow, Caleb can go back in the pool.

Back to his team. Good for him. Liam is just going to miss the little moments when it was just the two of them. Somehow, Liam wishes that their last trip would have been an after-school one. So they could have dragged things a little bit. Talk a bit more in front of Caleb’s house… Something.

But no. They get to school, they make a joke about Liam’s days as a taxi driver being over, and they go their separate ways.

Once more, Liam tries to convince himself that it is for the best. That the last thing he needs is a crush on his brother’s best friend. Still. It doesn’t feel like it’s for the best. He doesn’t even know where they stand now. Are they friends? Are they back to vague acquaintances? Will Caleb go back to being shy and awkward when it’s just the two of them? Will it ever be just the two of them again?