There was no way to put into words how impactful it was to have a collective crowd of thirty thousand peoplechanting your name from the top of their lungs at the same time. I heard it even through the earpieces that were supposed to cancel all unwanted noise out.

Sure, I had been there before, but it still hit me as hard as it had the first time. I was convinced no one could ever get used to it. The stage was like a warzone—five men against an entire army, the GRiD Crew, who had been waiting and preparing for this particular battle for a long, long time. They were certainly ready for it. 

Or rather…thirsty for blood, hungry for drama, demanding to be entertained.

The adrenaline rush that hit my veins was incredible—no rollercoaster or bungee jump could ever match it. No wonder the stage made some people go crazy—I could very well imagine getting addicted to this. So much that any regular moment would start to feel mundane. 

“Have you missed us?” Tae boasted after the first song—an ego boosting rap piece with lyrics designed for pure fanservice. 

“We definitely missed you,” Joonie—going by his stage name Sweet for the next two plus hours—added.

I smiled so widely it hurt. I couldn't even begin to describe how good it felt to be back at it. So good I was about to burst from pure energy overload.

The first two thirds of the two-hour concert went by in a blur. It was constant racing around backstage, cramped in odd places only to try to appear perfect on stage. Plus, the stage was absolutely enormous—meaning we had to run around it constantly to be able to use it in its full glory. 

Before our debut, I used to wonder why people were always so sweaty on stage. Now I certainly knew why. On top of the stamina-eating choreographies, we had to sing, change clothes about a million times, run to the next spot, and still look like it was nothing.

Still, it felt like I was born to do just that—exhaust myself to the point of almost collapsing yet continuing as if it didn’t affect me at all. It wasn’t so bad, to be honest. Plus, we did have some resting time whenever someone performed a solo or stayed behind to entertain the audience. 

One of those times, I too had to stay behind while the rest of GRiD were supposed to take a little break, get themselves freshened up and all that. I had prepared to do some waves with the fans, to get them moving a bit before we’d hit the last third of the concert. Look, it was nearly a three hour concert—the fans also needed some breaks here and there. 

Now, I didn’t get to do any of that though. Because for some weird reason, Do-hyun stayed behind with me. I was just about to shoo him off but he only winked back at me. 

“I wonder…” he started, giving me all kinds of side eyes before turning to face the audience. “...does anyone remember this one song called ‘Antithesis?’”

The crowd went wild, and shouted to their heart's content instantly, causing a huge grin to spread on Do-hyun’s face. Me, however, I froze totally, my mind shouting only one thing inwardly: No.

“Yes,” Jiwoo said through the feedback system, as if she had read my mind. I guess she had stolen the control of the system from the stage handler again. “Minjae, please, play along. Remember our deal. One more year of this.”

I ignored her totally, yanking my earpieces off. I even tried to shake my head discreetly, hoping to gain Do-hyun’s attention. He did glance at me, but either ignored me just like I had ignored Jiwoo or genuinely didn’t notice. Instead he let out a laugh at the audience’s reaction and continued to interact with them.

“Okay, okay, I hear you. You remember, alright…” he started, trailing off to wait for the crowd to calm down. “Now, what if I told you I found out the other day that Minjae still remembers the choreo?”

The fans went absolutely nuts over Do-hyun’s statement. Meanwhile, I was a panicking mess inside, trying my damn hardest to not show it to the fans even though my smile was probably very stiff. I could see there was no way out of doing it, yet I very much would’ve liked to disappear at that same second I realized it.

I hated Do-hyun’s guts at that moment. Best friend or not, the love of my life or not, I fucking hated him. Yet, my body betrayed me, my hand grabbing the ear pieces and shoving them back in, sporting a smile I couldn’t stop from spreading on my face and lighting it up.

“That’s the spirit,” Jiwoo said to my ear. “Starting ‘Antithesis’ at ten, nine...”

“Will you dance with me?” Do-hyun asked me, speaking to his handheld mic while offering his other hand for me to take. 

Not knowing what exactly had possessed my body, I took it while nodding. We both handed our microphones to a stage hand that appeared out of nowhere and faced each other. 

The all too familiar melody started playing both for the audience and in my earphones. For a brief moment, maybe a second tops, I wondered how they had managed to prepare the song that wasn’t on our setlist in such a short time. It was the live instrumental version, yet I was thankful that we wouldn’t need to sing it while dancing to it—the music was enough on its own. Then, the piece enchanted me and the story of the song made my body move on its own, and I could no longer think about anything. 

Though I could certainly feel. 

I could feel the bass vibrating through me even more so than in our little practice room back at home. I could feel the stage resonating with the noise. I could feel the fans responding and living it with us—a lot of them even singing along, somehow even remembering the lyrics of the old song. 

But above all else, I could feel Do-hyun. 

I could feel his fingertips brushing the bare skin on my arm while passing me according to the choreo. His breath on my neck when he circled behind me and grabbed my waist with his hands. And finally his heartbeat, that was just as loud as mine was when I leaned against his chest with my full weight for the closing image. 

Our ragged breaths mixed between us as we stared at each other even after the spotlight was turned off, both frozen in the moment. A tight knot appeared to the pit of my stomach when Do-hyun’s eyes travelled down from my eyes, before settling on my lips. I could’ve sworn he even leaned closer, his breath tingling my lips...

In the last possible millisecond, I pulled myself together. The moment was over. At once, we let go of each other and took a couple of steps back. I couldn’t help but shiver at the loss of his body heat. 

Now all this happened in the span of a few seconds. Then there was Tae’s hand on my shoulder, almost making me jump half a meter up in the air, startled. “I’ll take over, take a five,” he mouthed to me. 

While I nodded, he turned his eyes on Do, squinting. “And no more surprises.”

Do-hyun barely shook his head a bit, grabbed my hand and yanked me forward. He was grinning, apparently still thinking it had been a good idea. Good. That made one of us at least.

I decided to forget the whole incident.