"Okay. It's your turn and I've already picked for you. Have you ever done anything with another girl?"

 Oh. My. God. I can't believe she just asked me that. She's looking at me with those crazy eyes that she gets. The indication of curiosity. Does she know that I like her? Has she known this whole time? For the last fifteen years and just didn't say anything? My heart is beating out of my chest and I can feel the heat radiating off my face. I need to come up with an answer before she suspects something more.

"No, I've never done anything with a girl."
"Well, I dare you to kiss me."
"Hey, that's two -"

Rowan kisses me so powerfully and with so much intention, that I can't help but think that she has feelings for me. But I don't know. Maybe it's the wine or my terrible date. Or maybe it's Rowan's need to constantly feel spontaneous and interesting.

"There. Now you can't say you've never kissed a girl."

I'm not sure what to say and I still can't tell if she even wanted to kiss me or if she was just doing it to prove a point. Nevertheless, it was the most amazing kiss that I've ever had and, unfortunately, it just solidifies my feelings for her.

"Okay, it's your turn."
"Truth."
"You already picked truth last time. You know the rules. You have to pick dare."
"Fine. Dare."
"I dare you to chug the rest of your bottle of wine."

 Without hesitation, she downs the entire thing and it doesn't take long for the effect to set in. She begins slurring her words and swaying back and forth.

"Your tu- turn."
"Okay, truth."

As if she already had this question stored in her back pocket, she asks me something that I didn't expect. It throws me off and my body sweats with anxiety.

"Why did you drop out of the police academy?"
"Rowan, I don't want to talk about that. Pick something else."
"It's been years. Why can't you just tell me?"
"Because I don't want to."
"I promise, if you te- tell me, I'll tell you my biiiiigge-sst secret."

She is pretty drunk now, so I doubt if she'll even remember. And, I've never told anyone why. It would be nice to finally get it off my chest.

 "Fine but you have to promise not to tell anyone and you'd better tell me your secret when I'm done."
"Okay, okay. Now tell me."
"Well, the truth is, that I dropped out because Ryan was blackmailing me."

She looks stunned, like someone sucker-punched her or something. Maybe the alcohol is just making it harder for her brain to process what I said.

"What do you mean he was blackmailing you? What could he possibly have to blackmail you with?"
"He had a sex tape. He must've hidden a camera one time when we were having sex, and he recorded the whole thing. He threatened to show it to everyone if I didn't drop out. So I did."

She giggles slightly and hiccups before she replies.

"Good one. You had me going there for a minute."
"Rowan, I'm serious. Ryan is the reason I dropped out."

She looks mad now, maybe even irate. I've never seen her face with this expression before. She's definitely drunk but her eyes and nose and forehead are all scrunched up. She looks disgusted with me. Disgusted that I would lie about something like this. But I'm not lying. It's the truth.

"You always use Ryan as an excuse to solve all your problems, Harper. Why can't you just admit that you dropped out because you failed?"
"Rowan, I'm not lying. I would never lie to you. Ryan was really blackmailing me. I've always wanted to be a cop. I would never have dropped out unless I had to. He made me! He didn't want me to stay at the academy because he thought that I would stop letting him push me around. He thought that I would find someone else."
"You know, I really thought we were done with this childish shit. When are you going to stop hiding behind your relationship with Ryan and accept responsibility for your actions? You've been using this excuse for way too long."

She starts to untangle her legs from under her and rises to her feet. She stumbles slightly before she turns her back to me. She only makes it a few steps before she turns around and looks deeply into my eyes. I was hoping that she would apologize or tell me she had feelings for me or something. Anything but what she actually said.

"By the way, my big secret is that I fucked Ben in high school."

She storms out, grabbing all of her belongings and slamming the door behind her. I wanted to go after her, like I've always done. But what she said left me reeling. I couldn't move from my current position on the couch, even if I wanted to. So I just sat there, letting the information sink in.

Rowan. Had sex. With Ben. My brother.