“Damian, hey. I… I’m here with Grace.”

“Oh. Obviously. She seems to have ditched you for someone else, though.”

“Yeah… that happens. I thought this party wasn’t for first years?”

“It’s not. But it’s not a party, it’s a fundraiser and my dad did pay a lot of money for me to be able to do some networking.”

“Ah. Nepotism.”

“Yeah. I don’t think it’s right either, and I don’t like being here, but you know my dad…”

“I do. How was the internship? Is the Mayo clinic as great as everyone says?”

“It was incredible. I really felt a calling there. I couldn’t be in the heart of things, given that I wasn’t a med student yet, but… it truly was amazing.”

“I’m glad it worked out for you.”

“It might have worked for you too. You could have taken the internship even after stepping down from med school.”

“Wouldn’t that have been a little awkward? You and me working together after breaking up?”

“Yeah, maybe. But we would have been cordial if nothing else. You know I would never have stood in your way.”

He really is handsome. I kind of want to slide my fingers in his hair. I try to shake the uninvited thought off and say: “I know. But I haven’t changed my mind.”

“I won’t lie. When I saw you here, I sort of hoped…”

“This isn’t me, Damian.”

“What is you, then? Have you worked that out?”

“Not really. My mother is pushing for law or politics now, but I’m afraid that I am not after anything that will give me status.”

“Violin?”

“No.”

“But you play so wonderfully.”

“And I enjoy playing. I just don’t want to turn that into a job. Into something I have to do.”

Damian tilts his head and smiles at me. His smile is almost sad. “Just promise me that you won’t waste it.”

“Waste what?”

“That incredible brain of yours.”

I don’t know what to reply to that because I don’t know what he means. Also, I am torn between two feelings. I am equally pleased because of the praise, and annoyed that he would be this forward after breaking up with me. He is now confusing me and that is not fair.

“Maybe once I know what I’ll do, I’ll run it past you and you’ll tell me if it’s a waste,” I reply, trying – and failing – to sound challenging.

“Yes,” he replies with a lopsided smile. “You should do that.” His tone is getting playful, as if he was flirting. And I can hear it now. The way my sentence sounded like I was trying to find an excuse to see him again. But I wasn’t doing that. Damian is in the past. I know that. I made my peace with that. Didn’t I?

“Do you want to get coffee soon?” he asks. “We could catch up.”

“I thought med students didn’t have time to socialize?”

“We don’t,” he replies with an amused laugh. “But I’ll make some for you.”

I don’t know if I should feel flattered, but I don’t. “I can’t,” I tell him.

“Why not?”

“I’m not dating until spring.”

Damian’s eyebrows jerk up. For a second, I think that I might have read that wrong and that he was genuinely offering friendship. Luckily, his next sentence saves me from the shame and embarrassment of being the pathetic, clingy ex-boyfriend.

“If I can make time for you, can’t you make time for me?”

And I’m about to say yes. Of course, I’m about to say yes. That would be getting some control back over my life. Getting something back from a time I didn’t feel so lost. And Damian was never the problem.

But then I feel an arm link in mine. It’s Grace. “Damian. What are you doing here?”

“Same as you.”

“Going to a mandatory even for third-year med students? Wow. You study fast.”

He gives her one of those polite smiles we only get on our faces because it’s not polite to ask someone to get lost. “What happened to your date?”

“Actually this dashing man here is my date and I need him for a moment. He’ll find you later.”

Damian looks at me and says: “I’ll be around. And if we miss each other… coffee. Whenever. Just call me.”

I nod and turn to Grace as Damian walks away. “What do you need?”

“To save you from making a big mistake.”

“Like what?”

“Like giving shitface a second chance.”

“I thought you liked Damian.”

“No. I liked him better than the drug addict. That’s not a really high bar.”

“Clark was not a drug addict. And Damian is…”

“Damian is nothing. When you were having your little existential crisis, he wasn’t there for you. I don’t care that he’s back now and playing the ‘you’re still not a doctor but I still want to do you’ crap. Of course he got doubts seeing you. You’re the hottest person in this room. But you two will have fun for a while, and he’ll dump you for a doctor, a lawyer, an ambassador, or a porn actor. Because he cares more about social status than anything else.”

“Which status does a porn actor have, exactly?”

“Skills in the bedroom. Focus.”

“I try, but it’s really hard.”

“Andrew, I’m serious. Don’t do this. It’s a bad idea.”

“You can’t tell me who to date.”

“Yes. I can. Until spring, Kate and I control your love life, remember? And we are not giving Damian a free pass. If he’s still interested in April, then he’ll have proved me wrong and he’ll have my blessing. Until then, no funny business.”

“March.”

“Fine. March. Not before.”

We shake hands. And, deep down, I’m relieved. Because I know as well as she does that he won’t be interested comes March. Going back to Damian now would either have been a quick fuck or a failure-to-be.

See… that’s why I need the ‘no dating till spring’ rule. And more importantly, I need Grace and Kate to keep me from making rash, impulsive decisions.

Grace actually doesn’t trust me around Damian and although I think she’s overreacting, the last half hour is a point for her more than me. But she is also not ready to go. The little spark with Taz is apparently very new and she doesn’t want it to die before it can properly ignite.

I don’t think that it’s gonna be a problem. He looks like he has been waiting for this opportunity for a while too.

The three of us end up in a smaller, empty room, sitting at a piano. We are not playing, I don’t know if we’re allowed and it is an event at Grace’s place of work, so I don’t. We’re just here because they can share the stool and I am sitting on a foldable chair next to them.

Still, I can’t take my mind off the piano. Not for the reasons it should, though.

Grace kicks me. “Please, tell me you’re not thinking about him again.”

“Did you know that he plays the piano? He was academic, sporty, and played an instrument. He was perfect, wasn’t he?”

“Oh, please. He couldn’t play the piano. He knew how to do Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star, and that one Beethoven song.”

“Für Elise,” I precise because even if I knew which one she meant instantly, I can’t let her reduce Beethoven to one song.

“Oh, yes, even I can play that one,” Taz says. And I know they both have a point, but…

“Hey,” Grace says gently, nudging me with her foot. “I know it confused you a bit to see him, but you can’t go there again.”

“Why?” Taz asks. “If he has that guy under his skin, shouldn’t he give it another chance?”

Yes. Maybe just a second chance. There clearly was something there tonight. And maybe if he didn’t have to move across the country for his internship, we would have worked things out last spring instead of breaking up. Wouldn’t that just be giving our relationship its fair chance?

“Andrew,” Grace tells me like she can read my mind. “If you get back with him, you will be dragged back to that life you decided you didn’t want. And, I’m sorry to tell you that, but the fact that you kept it from him until the very last minute shows that the two of you can’t communicate very effectively.”

“Yes, said like that, it doesn’t sound like you should go back,” Taz agrees.

“March,” Grace says.

“March,” I agree. I won’t be sidetracked by a piano. Seeing Damian was just confusing, I guess. It would be easier if we broke up because of something massive that made us hate each other. It would be easier if I didn’t feel like the break-up was my fault and that I owe him somehow.

To be fair, it would also be easier if Grace was helping to distract me instead of talking to Taz about med school. Then again, they are cute to look at. In their interaction, there is a shyness mixed with a desire to show off and that is very interesting to analyze.

Was I the same when I first talked to Damian? Or Clark? Or Ben? Or Adam?

Was I like this an hour ago when I was talking to Damian? I’d like to have seemed confident, but I’ll take cute over desperate…

Deep in my thoughts, I nearly jump when someone sits next to me. It’s a boy I don’t know, slightly older than me. And, even if I try not to notice, very handsome. He smiles at me and extends his hand. “Scott.”

I shake his hand. “Yeah… have we met?”

He laughs. “No. I was introducing myself. I’m Scott.”

Right… I just love making a fool of myself in front of hot strangers. “Right. Sorry. I’m Andrew.”

“Not Scott?”

“No. Yes. It’s my last name. Andrew Scott.”

“Really? How amazing: I’m actually Scott Andrews.”

“Really?”

He laughs again. “No. But that would have been cool, right? Hi, Grace.”

“Hi, Scott.”

“Taz, my man, your ride is here. Are you ready?”

“I am. Thanks for picking me up. Grace, I’ll see you tomorrow?”

There is something in his voice… And tomorrow isn’t a school day. When did they make plans? How did I miss that?

“Sure!”

“Great. And Andrew, remember, not before March,” he tells me with an easy smile.

“Grace, see you later,” Scott says standing up to follow Taz. “You too, Andrew Scott,” he adds with amused eyes, as if my name was the greatest thing in the world.

“Who was that?” I ask Grace as soon as they leave the room.

“Scott.”

“Yes, I got that part. But who is Scott?”

“Someone sounds interested…”

“Not until March. And let me guess… he’s straight?”

“No one who looks this good is straight,” she replies with false bitterness in her voice. She and Kate love playing the ‘you get all the hot ones’ card. “But to answer your question, Scott is Taz’s roommate. Or neighbor. Something. I don’t know him that well.”

My mind registers that information. I have access to that boy. He is gay. He is handsome. He seemed easy-going. And, incredibly, he did get Damian out of my mind for a while.

I hope I’ll see him again. No dating till March, though. Although… one can have fun without dating.

Grace links her arm through mine. “Don’t even think about it.”

“What?”

“He’s off-limits.”

“Why?”

“If things get awkward and it impacts my relationship, I will have to smother you in your sleep.”

“Fine. I’m just…”

“Frustrated?”

“Yes, maybe that.”

“Then go have fun with your friends, don’t go after mine.”

“Oh, like you did on the fourth of July right after I moved in with you girls?”

“You said you’d forgiven me and that we’d never speak of it again.”

“I never said that we wouldn’t talk about it again. Pete still doesn’t talk to me…”

I keep teasing her as we finally leave the reception. My mind lingers back a little, though. Most of it is on Damian. What we had together, our conversation tonight, if he’ll still be available in March… But a little bit of it is occupied by Scott’s playful eyes. I know it’s just because he’s hot and that I’ll snap out of it soon. We exchanged ten words, it’s not like he rocked my world. But still. He was nice to look at…