POV: Milan

Monday

“Just ignore them,” Jacob said, as he sat down next to him during lunch. “I’d offer to punch them, but there’s simply too many and lunchbreak doesn’t last long enough.”

“You could make a start,” Cara chimed in, sitting down as well. “I’d like to see you punch every single student in school for staring at Mil.”

“Don’t punch them,” Milan muttered tiredly, “violence is never the answer.” 

Evert, one of Milan’s best friends joined the conversation, throwing a ball of paper against Jacob’s head. “Mister goody-two-shoe is right, violence isn’t going to solve all the staring.”

“Technically, if he’d all punch them in their eyes…” Cara lolled her head to the left with a small smile on her face. “But seriously, everyone’s  talking about it, trying to guess where you’ve been.”

“I am aware, thank you.”

Milan was highly aware of all the staring that seemed to escort him from class to class that day. He wasn’t stupid; he expected it to happen. His eight-month long absence was covered in mystery by a decision made by his parents, his manager, and his sponsors. They had all claimed he needed every bit of peace he could get to recover from breaking his neck, his back, several ribs, an arm, and whatever other injuries he suffered from.

All because one idiot skier had cut off through the halfpipe he had been riding, cutting him off during his landing.

The guy—or his insurance, Milan didn’t care—was still paying for the aftermath of his ignorant decision to risk his life, righteously so.

Still, it was easy to joke about punching everybody’s eyes shut. They didn’t have to deal with it every single second of the day. They had all passed their junior year in high school, while Milan was held back a year because they simply couldn’t predict if he could be back in school quick enough to pick up in time for graduation.

Before the accident, Milan could’ve easily afforded a few months of absence and still pick up where he left off. His grades were amazing—he had practically been a straight A student—and his teachers all had every bit of confidence that he was going to make it into an amazing university.

But they had to take in account that he suffered brain damage too, despite wearing a helmet. Brain damage that had cost him months of memories, which were still dripping back in slowly each day, and all of his concentration.

The first few classes he attended in months had drained him from most of his energy already, and he had only made it to lunch so far.

“Maybe throw them a bone, you know? To shut them up?” Evert suggested with a shrug. “Upload some old content.”

“Or the footage Jake still has of the acc—”

“—no.” Milan shook his head. He didn’t need people pitying him after watching the actual footage of the accident. One he couldn’t remember himself. He had watched the footage over and over, trying to will back more memories, but his parents had eventually taken the footage away because it would upset him too much, again and again.

If he wasn’t allowed to watch it, nobody was.

“The idea of uploading some old footage might shut some people up. I know most have just been wondering if you’d be dropping new footage soon,” Jake said with his mouth full of apple, agreeing with Evert.

“And then what? Raise expectations that I will actually start uploading new shit while I’m not even able to ski in a straight line, let alone shred the fucking mountain?” Milan again shook his head, though he was wondering what effect it would have on people to at least watch the hours of videos that were all currently hidden on inactive accounts. Before they’d be uploading the last video’s, they’d be months ahead in time.

Who’s to say he wouldn’t be able to explain everything without breaking down in the meantime, to raise understanding as to why there would be no new footage any time soon; if ever at all.

He looked up, finding his three friends staring at him curiously, in silence, as if awaiting an answer. Did he miss another question? It wouldn’t be the first time that day.

“What?”

“You seem doubtful.”

“Oh.”

Cara nudged him playfully, leaning closer to him with a devious smile on her face. “Your secrets are safe with us, you know that. Just admit it does sound tempting to reupload a bunch of old videos to silence the curious people in town. We won’t tell anyone.”

“If I’d say I was tempted, basically it would mean I’d consent with uploading it, and then everybody would know I was tempted to upload them.”

“And they say you wouldn’t get back to your old level of being a smarty-pants,” Jacob mumbled with a smile on his face. “I’m dying to just activate everything again. It was a huge part of my portfolio and all my new shit isn’t half as interesting or cool. But only if you fully agree.”

“Your new shit…” Milan replied, chuckling at Jacob, “if you’re calling it shit, it’s shit.”

“Exactly!”

“And it doesn’t show your personal development either.” Cara wisely pointed out. “Let Milan think everything over. I’m sure you’ll be the first one to know when he’s ready, Jake.”

Milan sighed deeply. He knew they weren’t pushing him; they would never. But they did have some valid arguments as to why he should agree with them publishing everything; it had been Jacob’s lifework to edit all the footage. He was pursuing a career in the filming industry and Milan had told him to take all of it down.

During summer, they had agreed that Jacob could still use everything for professional goals, but Milan had known him long enough to know that Jacob would never show any of it to anyone unless Milan agreed to publish it again.

He didn’t quite feel ready yet, which was why he didn’t reply, and the topic swiftly changed to trying to find an afternoon to hang out with the entire group again. Not just Milan, Jacob and Evert, but their other friends Sang and Darrell too.

“Now that you mention, where are Sang and Darrell anyway?” Milan asked with a frown, knowing quite sure they all shared their lunchbreak.

“I think Sang is chasing Daisy,” Jacob replied with a frown, staring at the empty seats at their table. “Darrell had this thing for theater club.”

Which was one way to describe their group of five; diverse. Though none of them were the stereotypical kind of… well, stereotypes.

Jacob was a popular guy who happened to know everything about tech. No shy, ugly, nerd type of tech-geek; Milan was comfortable enough with his attraction to guys to say that Jacob was hot.

Evert was a slightly overweight guy with glasses, ginger hair, a fairly light skin and freckles. But what he missed in looks—according to the ideal image— he made up in personality. He really was the sweetest guy to his girlfriend Lianne. He had an exceptional talent for games like checkers and chess.

He also happened to be the star quarterback in their school.

Sang was the guy who was in love with a new girl each week, but never actually succeeded in getting their number, let alone a date. Milan actually met him at Ice hockey years before, where Sang used the lack of height to dodge opponents. He was faster than anyone in their team because he simply had amazing skate techniques. Sang had thought Milan quite a few things on the ice.

Lastly, there was Darrell. His skin a chocolate brown, his eyes deep as the night. His parents had wanted him to pursue a career as a professional Basketball player since he was tall, quick, and pretty talented at it too. Darrell, however, rather wanted to act on stage or write poems. He used to drag them to open mic nights every few weeks to read one out loud.

Milan didn’t really like poetry or listening to it. But he did love Darrell’s deep voice, and the way it carried out the words.

Of course, he also didn’t exactly mind looking at Darrell for a longer period guy. The guy was handsome in his own way.

They all had their own lives outside of school, and sometimes it was hard to find time to hang out with all of them since the diversity in sports and hobbies didn’t exactly sync their schedules; but they always made sure to make time eventually.

Milan wouldn’t trade his friends for anything in the world.