As we are walking back from the park, I see Liam looking very pale. I guess he drunk too much - he’s struggling to walk straight. Instinctively, I hold his hand as we walk back in silence.

Looking at the stars, my mind starts to wonder. 

It’s been a month since Liam came here and I haven’t seen any of my brothers’ men.  This can mean two things: they left the city, assuming that I was somewhere else - or Liam lied.

The first option is way more probable than the second. Although a part of me can’t help but think that Liam could’ve lied in order to come and see me. If I let my mind wander even further, I could even imagine that Liam coming here was part of a plan - or a trap.

I welcomed him with open arms, without asking any questions. We haven’t seen each other in two years - things could’ve changed. He could’ve been so hurt that he decided to team up with the Kellers or my family.

I search for my keys inside my pocket and open the door, holding his hand once again to take him to the bedroom. I help him get into his pajamas. He’s barely conscious.

He lays on the bed.

“I’ll get a bottle of water for you, okay?”

As I leave, he grabs my arm. “I’m fine. Please just stay here for a bit.”

I sit next to him, stroking his hair.

I hate thinking that he could’ve lied but I can’t ignore the facts either: I have no idea what happened to him these past two years, he found me through a contact that he won’t tell me about, and there’s still no sight of my brothers, Esteban and Rafael.

Also, if he didn’t lie, and my brothers just decided to leave this city, then Liam can go back to our hometown.

But I've gotten used to having him around - I like having him here. I know that he can’t stay forever, even more if there’s nothing for him here. We’ll need to talk about it tomorrow. 

Liam is now asleep. I go get two bottles of water and put them on each side of the bed. 

****

Malakai and I left for school while Liam was still asleep. It was raining cats and dogs and I only have one umbrella - so we had to share it. I told Malakai that it looked like we were the main couple in a shojo anime, which got me kicked out from under the umbrella. He was running away with it, me chasing him. 

When we came back home from school, it was 6pm and it was already dark. We accompanied Noah back, then headed home. Hopefully, it had stopped raining. 

Liam is on the balcony, smoking. I decide to join him.

“Hey, how was school?,” he asks.

“Boring. And Malakai refused to share an umbrella with me.” He laughs and I continue, “we need to talk.”

He turns to face me, “did something happen?”

“No actually - quite the opposite. You’ve been here for a month and we haven’t seen my brothers or their men. I think they left, which means that you can go back home.”

A weight drops on my stomach. I said this so bluntly. His shoulders fell with a sigh. I can see that he didn’t like it. 

“You’re right,” he admits, “if they’re gone, I have no reason to stay.” He pauses for a moment before continuing, “unless you want me to stay.” I can see the anticipation in his eyes.

I want you to stay. 

Honestly, I don’t care about his life in our hometown, I don’t care about his friends there, I don’t care about his family. Just stay here with me.

But saying this would be selfish. He can’t just abandon everything to stay here. And for what? For me? I have nothing to offer him - except a life in hiding.

Or a broken relationship.

“You stayed to protect me and now there’s nothing to protect me from. I can’t keep you here. Besides, I’m sure you have a whole life waiting for you back home.”

He takes a step closer. “That doesn’t answer my question. Do you want me to stay, Adriel?” I stay silent. I’m pretty sure I don’t have to say it for him to know. He shakes his head. “Alright, I’ll be gone by the end of the week. But there’s something we need to do first.”

“What is it?”

He scratches the back of his head, “I may have won four entry tickets for an amusement park today.”

I give him a questioning look. “You may? Wait, did you win them at the convenience store? Noah has been trying to get some for weeks! It’s hard enough to get one - how did you manage to get four?”

“I don’t know, I just got the right numbers?” I stare at him, gaping. “They expire soon though. You guys might have to skip school for a day this week.”

“I know, the lottery was until today! Let’s go tomorrow then, Noah’s going to be ecstatic. I’m going to tell Malakai now.”

Before I can get back inside, Liam puts out his cigarette and pulls me in for a hug. His embrace is so tight, I can barely breathe. I can feel his heart beating against my chest.

“Liam?”

“Can we stay like this for a little bit?”

I wrap my arms around him. It’s pretty cold outside but his embrace is so warm. I bury my face in his neck.

I missed his hugs.

I guess the idea of leaving pains him as much as it pains me. But I can’t keep him here, I wish I was selfish enough - but I can’t. And unless the Kellers and my family decide to stop looking for me, we might never see each other again. By coming here, he not only endangered me but also himself.

I wish we could just stay like this. I don’t want to let go of his embrace - of him - but I have to. I gently pull back and his forehead meets mine. I close my eyes and take a big breath, inhaling his familiar scent, before stepping away and heading back inside. I leave him alone on the balcony.

When I told Malakai about the amusement park, I could see a glimpse of fear in his eyes. He hates amusement parks. He’s so afraid of rollercoasters - watching him on one is like watching someone slowly lose their will to live. But he knows that Noah loves them, so he always goes with him, and does all the rides, at the peril of his sanity. He asked to call Noah himself to tell him the news. I could hear Noah screaming from the other room.

Tomorrow would be so fun if I didn’t know it was one of Liam’s last days with us. I know Malakai and Noah are going to be upset about Liam leaving - that’s why I won’t tell them tomorrow. I want all of us to have a good day and I know Noah will be upset if he knows. He gets attached to people really fast.

That night, Liam and I agreed to not tell Malakai and Noah about him leaving until this weekend. We’ll tell them that there’s something that Liam has to tend to urgently, so it doesn’t look like we’ve been hiding it from them.

As I was about to doze off to sleep, I feel Liam get under the sheets. I open my eyes to see his back turned to me.

I feel like someone is holding my heart in their fist. I really don’t want him to go.

****

Malakai woke up earlier than Liam and I so he could get ready and pick up Noah. When he arrived, he was wearing pink overalls with bunny ears, supporting the park’s mascot. Out of his bag, he took out three more bunny ears and asked us to wear them. “Please wear them with me, we’ll be super cute.”

Seeing that I’m a bit reluctant to do so, Liam takes two and puts the bunny ears on his head, then on mine. 

“It suits you,” he says with a smirk.

I take them off and we all agree to only wear them in the park. I love Noah - but I’m not wearing bunny ears on the metro.

After about an hour of metro, we finally arrive at the park. It’s 9am and the park just opened its gate. Around us, everyone starts to run.

What is this?

On Noah’s cue, we all put our bunny ears on.  He then grabs Malakai’s hand. “We need to run if we don’t wanna queue for too long for our first ride!”

You don’t have to tell me twice - I have zero patience. That’s why I try to avoid amusement parks. An hour of waiting in line for three minutes of fun? It must be a joke.

Noah starts running, pulling Malakai, while Liam and I follow him. He knows this park by heart, we trust him with the first rollercoaster.

We shouldn’t have.

It’s 9am and he just led us to the craziest ride of the park. It’s the most popular one. The one everyone was running for.

It’s called The Snake. It can achieve top speeds of around 140 miles per hour and there are many loopings.

I quickly look at Malakai, he looks petrified, while Noah is jumping around. He takes us to into the queue.

“Are you sure you can do this?,” I ask Malakai.

“I can try,” he answers, drained of all colors.

“What about you, Liam?” Liam doesn’t look so confident either.

“Well it’s definitely not the one I would’ve chosen, but I’m curious. I’m sure it’s going to be fun.”

After waiting for 20 minutes, we finally get on the ride. Noah and Malakai are in front of us.

“This is going to be a disaster,” I whisper to Liam, “be ready to carry Malakai out of this ride.”

Liam gives me a worried look, then the ride starts.

It’s going so fast, I’m holding onto my sit for my dear life. In front of me, Noah has his arms raised, screaming of joy. On my side, Liam is laughing, screaming with Noah. I don’t hear Malakai though - I guess he’s fine. I let go and try to enjoy the ride.

Once, I think I hear Noah screaming Malakai’s name, concerned.

After two minutes, the ride ends. As predicted, we have to help Malakai up. Liam and I carry him to the nearest bench. He is green, void of all emotions. We sit him down, Noah next to him, comforting him. He’s repeating how sorry he is. “You said you wanted to try, I never should have let you ride it.”

“I didn’t hear you scream, I thought you were fine.” I say.

Malakai doesn’t answer, or even look up to me. Noah answers instead, shameful, “he actually fainted twice during the ride.”

“What?” Liam and I shout. I look at Liam and the three of us burst into laughter.

“Gosh Malakai, next time don’t play tough - just be a p*ssy. We understand.” He gives me a death stare.

We stay here for a few minutes, enough for Malakai to get back on his feet. We decide to move on to another ride. There is this one ride where you can shoot objects while driving, we decide to do this one.

The waiting time was 40 minutes, but it was worth it. Malakai and Noah sucked at it, their aim was all over the place, whereas Liam and I were hitting every target. They were so impressed. Unfortunately, I don’t think they’d like to hear why we’re so comfortable with guns.

After that we just walked around the park, taking pictures with the different mascots. Noah is now leading us to another rollercoaster, but this time Malakai and I will wait for Liam and him to finish it.

Noah is holding Malakai’s hand. If I didn’t know them, I would think they were a couple. They’re so comfortable with each other. Although, holding hands definitely means something different for each of them. I don’t think it means anything in particular for Noah - he’s just leading his best friend to a ride, holding his hand so he won't lose him in the crowd. But judging by how Malakai looks at him, there’s a whole different meaning there. He looks at him so fondly, as if they were only the two of them in the park. The two of them have always been… somewhere else. In their own little world. They only need one another and nothing else matters.

Of course, they snap out of it when I’m here.

But sometimes, I wonder just how close they are. They think I don’t notice it, but I do.

Their relationship seems beautiful and naive from the outside, but I know it’s far from it. They depend on each other in a way that living without one another seems impossible. I thought that my relationship with Liam was toxic, but it is nothing compared to theirs.

Thinking about Liam - I just realized something that I don’t understand.

He's strangely close to Noah. 

Noah is really approachable and lovable, you just can’t not love him. And Liam is also pretty good at socializing, he can be friends with anyone.

But there’s a weird vibe between the two.

Noah isn’t acting out of the ordinary, he’s treating Liam like any of his friends - the problem is on Liam’s side. He’s really sweet to him. He looks at Noah as if he was a cute little puppy, as if he wanted to protect him at all cost.

He used to look at me that way.

When we were younger, he was so protective of me. He would look at me with his kind eyes, as if I was the only person in the room, like I was his number one priority. 

And right now, he looks at Noah that way.

Noah is beautiful, not in a hot way, but in a pretty way. With his gentle features, he could easily pass as a woman. Moreover, his naiveness makes people want to protect him. It’s like a spell that he puts on people.

As he bewitched Liam?

I know Noah isn’t trying anything, he’s just being himself. But I don’t understand why Liam is acting this way towards him, and it bugs me.

****

It’s 9pm. We did most of the rides and watched the parades. It’s time for us to head back home.

I tell Noah to sleep over, as it is already late. Moreover, Malakai has planned to cook carbonara - again-  for dinner. 

Liam goes to take a shower while Malakai and Noah are preparing dinner.

After a few minutes, I’m in my bedroom, looking for my pajamas, when Liam comes back from his shower.

“Today was really fun” he says, while drying his hair with a towel.

“It was, although we almost lost Malakai.” He laughs. I really want to ask him about Noah. “What do you think of Noah?”

He frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Well, you two seem close.”

He shakes his head, he looks confused. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I barely know him.”

“It doesn’t seem like it.” It sounded more dry than intended.

“What is that supposed to mean? Is there something you want to say?” He steps closer to me. I stay put.

“You go figure.”

He throws his towel on the bed with a loud sigh, “Adriel, don’t you dare.”

“Don’t I dare what?”

“Don’t you dare be jealous. You have no right or reason to be.”

Jealousy. It’s the feeling that was bugging me earlier. I don’t even understand why. 

“What? That’s ridiculous.”

“Then why are you acting like this? I’m not your property Adriel.” He’s starting to get angry, tension fills the air around us.

“God, just forget it then-”

I don’t have the time to finish my sentence that he grabs the collar of my shirt and pulls me closer to him. Our faces are so close, I can feel his breath on my lips.

“Don’t dismiss me like this. If you want me, just f*cking say it.”

F*ck.

You could cut the sexual tension with a knife. My heart is beating so fast it feels like it’s going to leave my body.

You know what? F*ck it.

“I want you.”