The hours passed by and the familiar surroundings faded behind him. Thaim turned around every now and then to take a look. He didn’t regret leaving but he could not deny that he feared what lay before him.

The only person who had ever treated him differently was Dova. And even he had needed some time to come to terms with what he was. After he realized, that was. That lover of his, for all the strength he had, he was scatterbrained at times.

When they met, Dova had looked at him and looked and looked. Thaim had started to worry. He had suffered from the Velheyn’s derision for a long time but never from violence. They probably felt it beneath them to touch him even if it was just to hit him. But he had heard stories and he knew that there was always the possibility to run into one that would not care and just see this lesser creature as a good way to vent whatever grievances they had.

When he saw Dova for the first time and mistook his gaze for glaring, he had believed to have landed himself in precisely that kind of situation. His heart had raced in fear and he had thought to run away. But then … then, that Velheyn had shown the barest of smiles. Not the kind of grin that he was used to but the awkward one he had sometimes seen directed at others.

To this day, Thaim could not say what made him stay. Even the Aldhar did not dare to believe a Velheyn would stay with them but they at least had a chance. He, on the other hand? He was merely a Tarlheyn. There wasn’t even the slightest possibility of something more. And yet, he had continued to sit on the spot, waiting for what would happen while the hasty beat of his heart turned into something that was less fear and more expectation.

He had been alone most of his life and he didn’t hold hope for anything permanent but he was old enough to want to experience the touch of another person even if it was just once. And Dova’s gaze held the faintest hint of the possibility that this might not be an empty hope.

When the Velheyn finally stepped forward, he had straightened up a little, his own gaze still careful but also the barest smile on his lips for once in the hope to heighten his good feelings.

It had worked. Dova had been spellbound for a moment but then collected himself. He had looked at the things that Thaim offered for the first time, being somewhat at a loss when he saw them: some wooden baskets and caskets and earthen pots in different sizes. Nothing seemed to really fit together and while they looked sturdy, they didn’t please the eye. Not to mention that he as a soldier at Soaran’s court had absolutely no use for them.

He looked back up at Thaim, not sure how to proceed. He wasn’t interested in his wares but he also felt it would be wrong to ask for his time if he relied on selling these. He hesitated and then looked at those things again, finally pointing at a small, nondescript casket. "May I have that one?" He couldn’t use it either but it was a good excuse.

Thaim nodded and picked it up, handing it to the Velheyn while making sure not to touch him. He was still somewhat worried that he might have misinterpreted his gaze. Then, he would just find himself in trouble.

Dova had just nodded though, taken out some money, and then added a little more after another look at those crooked wares. He couldn’t imagine that Thaim sold much. When he handed over the money, he grasped the other man’s hands, holding on for a moment.

There had been surprise in Thaim’s eyes, almost shock. For a moment, that gave Dova pause. He wasn’t sure how to continue. It had seemed innocuous enough to just hold his hand for a moment but suddenly, he couldn’t help but wonder if he had gone too far.

He had assumed this person to be alone, maybe a destitute youth left orphaned by the war who made do however he could. But now, the thought of whether there might be somebody waiting for him at home came up. After all, there were enough men who had been injured in the war, unable to go on despite the strong healing capabilities of a Velheyn’s body.

Yes, at that time, such a thought had still been normal. Their kind of relationship hadn’t been outlawed by the Cejta yet. A young man fending for himself and his husband would have been seen as a noble sacrifice.

Thinking of that, Thaim couldn’t help but smile helplessly. He glanced up toward the north again where the castle had to be somewhere up the mountain range that he could make out in the distance. He couldn’t spot the building yet. In fact, he probably wouldn’t be able to for a long time. He really … hadn’t covered much of a distance.

He sighed when he realized this with a gaze over his shoulder. The pond where he had waited for Dova’s message couldn’t be seen behind him any longer but he could still tell where it was. Really, the north was far from here. He sighed again and turned back to the front, huddling into himself and marching on. Even though it would take a long time, he would still continue.

The sun climbed up the sky while he walked and in the distance, he heard the sound of hooves. He glanced around but he couldn’t see anyone so he just scrunched up his shoulders against the wind and continued on. Maybe they weren’t even going in his direction.

To be honest, he might not need to worry. As a Tarlheyn, the Velheyn wouldn’t care about where he went. But then again, some of the soldiers knew about him. They had seen him with Dova after all. If they had realized that he had gone missing, who knew if they wouldn’t try to get some information out of him? He couldn’t risk that.

Thaim picked up his pace, hoping that they would pass him by. He wondered if he should try and conjure up some fog in the way that man had told him but when he tried, nothing happened.

He sighed. Really, he shouldn’t have expected anything else. It was already past midday by now and the sun was at its fiercest. There wasn’t much water around and he needed it to create the fog. He wasn’t like the Aldhar that could turn any kind of elemental magic into something.

With no way to shield himself from view, he could only continue walking. The sound of hooves lingered in the distance, then faded away. He heaved a sigh of relief, his shoulders sagging.

With this reminder that something could happen anytime, Thaim continued forward, not stopping at all even though he had been walking for hours. When evening fell, a faint drizzle accompanied the encroaching darkness, making him blink his eyes against the droplets and furrow his brows in annoyance.

This was the kind of weather he could have used earlier when he was afraid to be seen. It would have helped a lot. Right now, it was only making him uncomfortable. He couldn’t change it though. Thus, he only scrunched up his shoulders again, trying to keep out the cold.

He walked until late at night when his legs didn’t want to carry him further. At that time, he stopped and raised his head to the sky, blinking against the raindrops that had gotten bigger with time. The sky had long turned completely dark but the moon overhead still lit up the path in front of him.

If he had any strength left, he should have used the time and walked further. That way, he could have created some more distance between himself and the place he had come from. It would have made it less likely to be spotted. But as things stood, he really couldn’t bring himself to take even one step further.

He sighed and looked around, wondering if there was any place nearby where he could take cover from the rain. Unfortunately, fate didn’t mean well. He was on a plain bereft of most vegetation. The most he could find was a meager shrub that had already lost its leaves to the autumn winds.

Thaim sighed again but still forced himself to wobble over there before he laid down. The shrub might not provide any cover from the rain but maybe it could keep some of the cold winds out of his face and shield him from view in case somebody came by.

With that thought, Thaim closed his eyes and soon fell asleep. In his dreams, he felt himself pulled into his lover’s warm embrace. A calloused hand rubbed his back, comforting him after an especially bad day and promising a better tomorrow.

He smiled faintly in his sleep. Right now, it might only be a dream but he knew that soon enough, such nights would be possible again. When he made it to the north, they could lie next to each other again, without having to worry that they might be reported and punished for their misdemeanor. Yes, up in the north, none of that would be a concern any longer.

Daylight arrived and Thaim slowly opened his eyes, fluttering his lids a couple of times to shake himself awake. His whole body hurt. He was used to sleeping outside and weathering the cold climate of the north. He wasn’t used to walking this far. And maybe the two years with Dova before the law had been laid down had made him soften a bit. He wasn’t used to this at all.

He sighed and then slowly pushed himself up into a sitting position. When he did, he noticed the shadows on the ground.

He froze up and then slowly turned around, his gaze first landing on the boots that were planted just a step away from him on the ground and then wandering higher, along a strong pair of legs, and finally up to a solemn face.

Thaim gulped. This person was a Velheyn, one of the soldiers of the Soaran court. He had seen him with Dova several times before. From what he knew, this man hadn’t thought too well of him but Dova had never told him much about these things. He hadn’t wanted him to be unhappy.

Thaim turned around fully but remained on the ground. Actually, he was as tall as the Velheyn and if he hadn’t been a little scrawny from the years of barely being able to feed himself, he probably could have been a soldier himself. Not that they would want him to. But nonetheless, he knew that he couldn’t win a fight against one or even several of them when relying on his physical strength.

And while the ground was covered in dew and there was the scent of approaching rain in the air once again, his magic wasn’t that strong either. It could be a distraction at best and that wouldn’t be enough. He couldn’t outrun a group of men on horses.

If they intended to make trouble for him, he could not do anything. That thought hit him, almost making him collapse to the ground. He had come so far. He didn’t want to be thwarted at the last moment. He hadn’t even been able to see Dova again and hug him one more time without all that secrecy.

The Velheyn stared at him as if waiting for him to say something. When Thaim didn’t, he glanced up at the sky where dark clouds were gathering already. "I haven’t seen Dova since two days ago."

Thaim looked at him, not sure what to say. This man knew that they had been lovers but under the current laws … could he still admit to anything? He hesitated but then shook his head. "Me neither. He came to see me in the evening but he didn’t stay long and went back to the barracks. Since then, I haven’t seen him again."

The man lowered his gaze again and then nodded. "Well, if you see him, tell him that he’s in trouble if he doesn’t get back soon."

Thaim nodded, his heart racing. Would this be all? Would that man just turn away and leave him alone? He couldn’t believe it. Surely, they knew what was up. Two days was a long time and now they had even spotted him out here where there was nothing. Nothing, other than the path to the north, that was.

But even though Thaim couldn’t imagine it, the soldier indeed turned away and got back onto his horse. He didn’t ride off immediately though and instead looked at him for a moment longer.

Thaim looked back, the dark eyes that he had probably inherited from whichever of his parents had been an Aldhar guileless as if he knew nothing.

The man turned to the back and opened the bag hanging from the saddle, searching around for a while before he pulled something out of it and threw it at Thaim.

The Tarlheyn didn’t dare to move and it hit him in the face before it fell into his lap, the soft fabric stunning him. He stared up at the Velheyn, not understanding what was going on.

The man didn’t even look at him. Instead, his face was turned in the other direction. "Tell your man to take better care of you if he lets you roam around alone outside like this. If you freeze to death, who is going to keep him warm at night?" He didn’t wait for a response and spurred his horse, riding off back to wherever they had been on patrol.

Thaim still heard the others inquiring or laughing at him for what he had just done. 'Just doing some charity for a beggar,' he vaguely made out his answer, and then they were already gone, leaving him alone with what turned out to be a woolen coat.

Thaim didn’t know what to make of this. He looked in the direction the soldiers had left in but then got to his feet. He might not understand why but he understood that this man had wanted to help. He had probably realized what was going on and despite that, he had let him off. If he didn’t make use of that kindness, he didn’t deserve to see Dova again.

Thus, Thaim put on that coat and then hurried along, further and further away from the place where he had grown up and toward the castle in the north where he would hopefully spend the rest of his life with the one he loved.