How do I start my day? Same as anyone else, I put my pants on 31 legs at a time.
My day usually starts with me waking up in a jolt actually, as I gracefully scramble to make sure that we made it through the night. I check everyone's status, Angel - Dormant, Image - Fine, Lila - Good, etcetera, etcetera.
Usually whoever is in the body while I'm doing this will already be on the move, taking our morning piss, brushing our teeth, you know the deal. However as my adrenaline dies down I notice we're still just laying in bed. I flip through the profiles once more to see who's fronting and- oh. It's me. Whoops.
I yank the meat suit in the direction of the bathroom and go about our business then I gaze into the mirror at a reflection that isn't my own.
Does this sound like a nightmare yet? Well it isn't too bad, honestly you get used to it.
I should probably clarify here that we are not some monstrous blob-like entity and that the only thing connecting us is a brain and one (1) body.
We're what's known medically as your typical case of Dissociative Identity Disorder, which you might've heard of under the name: "Multiple Personality Disorder."
Which is really just hurtful when you actually think about it, I'm more than just a personality, I've got a hot body too!
In all seriousness though, regardless of what you call it, what it all spells out to is the same thing. We're stuck.
For better or for worse we're a team for life, and our only mission is to live it.
Which proves to be easier said than done when you've got fifteen other opinions weighing in on the matter, and sometimes a few are voting in opposition of doing just that.
That's sort of where I come into play you see, I'm what's known as "The Gatekeeper" which is a terrible name for an amazing thing that I do.
Its less of a job and more of an innate ability, but what it means is that I run the
behind the scenes work, the real show.
Sure you've got your host, the face of the company, the one who everyone wants to speak to when they don't quite get it.
But if they only knew what it is I do.
Let me give you the highlights. As Gatekeeper I'm able to have some degree of control over who's fronting, as in I can pull the emergency breaks and send everyone flying to the back of the bus.
This works usually, but as the emergency breaks are not equipped with emergency breaks, odds are about twenty percent of the time, I've got nothing.
Not bad right?
I also control how much information travels through the grapevine, can't have sensitive information being leaked to vulnerable places.
Of course this often leaves me in the position of having to play dumb when someone's angry that they got left out.
Essentially what I do best is always know a little too much. Just a tad more than I'd ever want to know, about myself, about the others.Then I use that information and I stack the odds.
Which I know all seems very sinister when I put it through that lense, and believe me if there was another way, I'd use it, but this really is the only way to function.
The others know the work I do and they understand, they don't envy me. There's a good reason that a lot of gatekeepers come across a bit robotic.
Honestly I'm not even sure how I do it, You'd think someone with my job would be completely crazy by now, crazy enough to hear voices or something, haha oh.
Its not all doom and gloom though, I can't always tell people what they want to hear but I can at least steer them in the right direction.
I've got a pretty good team to work with as well, but don't let them know I said that. (Although maybe we can do with our head getting a bit bigger, it's crowded in here!)
If I'm being completely honest, I don't really mind my job either, even if it puts a bit of distance between me and the ones I care about, at least I know they're safe.
So I guess in summary, if you're going to be stuck with someone, make sure it's in good company, and bring something to read, it's gonna be awhile!
Take a peak into the inner-workings of a mind shared by multiple people. "Synced" explores the many facets of mental illness, including the painful parts, the thought provoking parts and the often times humorous ones. Getting diagnosed with DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) changes the course of lives, but it doesn't end them. This System has been surviving, but now they must learn how to live.
(This story is not meant to educate, rather to inform and erase stigma. We can only speak from our own experiences as DID exists on a case by case basis.
This story is not meant to invalidate or imply anything about any other DID/OSDD system.)