[Chapters 12 and 13 are merged again, bc chap 13 was too long for Tapas lmao]

My chest is rising and falling rapidly, trying to catch with my rapid thoughts. My brothers’ men didn’t leave, and they are so close. What if they talked to Malakai? Just the idea of them being in the same room scares me, disgusts me. Just the sight of them makes me want to puke. 

Especially Colby.

James is still as ugly as he was two years ago. He used to have a perfect nose, until he decided to pick a fight with Esteban, one of my brothers. Hopefully, they are still friends, but his new crooked nose does not compliment his bold head and gross features.

Colby hasn’t changed much. Like mine, his hair got longer. Even if he is just standing, smoking a cigarette in the cold, he has this aura. The same aura that attracted me years ago, the one that led me into his trap. Seeing him pains me, as if he still has an influence on me after all those years. It’s like his hands are around my throat, I am struggling to breathe.

Did my brain know he was coming before I did?

Instinctively, I start sprinting back to the apartment. When I arrive there, Liam is still smoking on the balcony. He turns around to look at me, he must wonder why I stepped out for 10 minutes, and why I am desperately reaching for one of the kitchen chairs. He puts his cigarette out and rushes to me. 

“Adriel, what’s wrong?”

I sit and take a deep breath. “My brothers’ men are here, they didn’t leave. I just saw them outside of the Hideout.”

For a moment, he stays silent and doesn’t react. A thought rushes through my head: maybe he doesn’t believe me? Maybe he thinks it’s just an excuse to make him stay?

“Who were they?” He asks.

“James and-” I stop. He knows Colby, he knows what happened between us. Maybe I should keep the fact Colby is here to myself.

But I don’t have the time to say another random name that he looks away, with a deep sigh.

“If he approaches you I will kill him,” he looks back at me, he seems both mad and worried, “you can’t go to the Hideout anymore. Actually, I don’t want you out of this apartment, or at least not without me. Also, we should tell Malakai to quit, they could use him to track you, or ask him questions-”

“Liam, slow down. I won’t go there anymore, and I’ll go out only when it’s necessary. But I can’t tell Malakai to quit. This has nothing to do with him. Besides, what would be the reason? ‘Hey by the way some people are trying to kill me and oh oh they are your customers! Please quit?’ When he comes back let’s ask if he noticed anything weird, and we’ll go from there. Malakai and Noah don’t know about my past, I want to keep it that way.”

He clenches his jaw. If it was his decision, we would flee this city right now. “Fine. Let’s wait for him to get home.”

I nod, before asking, “you believe me right?”

He frowns. It sounds so dumb to say it out loud. “Why wouldn’t I believe you?”

“No reason, just forget it.”

He stares at me for a few seconds then says, “I guess I’ll stay until we are sure they left. If they stayed for so long it must mean that they have a good lead. We have to be extra careful.”

I nod.

Since none of us actually wants to talk to the other, we decide to watch TV while waiting for Malakai to be back. 

Around 11pm, we hear the sound of the door being unlocked. Malakai comes in, throws his jacket on the sofa and heads to the kitchen to get a glass of water.

“How was work?” I ask.

“It wasn’t great. I broke my third glass tonight, so I’ll spend the next 3 nights in the kitchen doing the dishes.”

Liam and I sigh in relief. He won’t see James or Colby if he is in the kitchen.

“Any weird customers today?”

Liam likes to ask this question. Malakai always has something to say about an annoying customer he had, so hopefully it doesn’t sound suspicious to ask tonight.

“Not really, just two guys who pretty much chatted with everyone, showing a picture of someone. I didn’t get to see who they were looking for, tonight was such a busy night, I hated it.”

Liam and I exchange a quick look. “And do you think they found who they were looking for?” I asked, anxiously.

“I have no idea.”

Someone had to talk. The customers at the Hideout are always the same, and they all know me. I bet Marcus, the bartender, told them everything about me.

We quickly change the subject and start cooking. 

****

As I am doing the dishes, I realize that I haven’t seen my phone in a while. I suddenly feel this acute stress, as if I just lost a lung or something. I put the dishes down, dry my hands and look around the empty living room. Malakai is taking a shower and Liam is in my room unpacking his stuff. After looking everywhere in the living room, even under the couch, I head to my room.

When I open the door, I see Liam sitting with his legs crossed, his guitar on his lap. I let out a oh.

“Look what I found under the bed,” he says.

“What were you doing under my bed?”

“One of my socks fell while I was putting them back in the drawer.” I scan the room, my phone is on the bed next to him.

“After you left,” he continues, “I looked for it everywhere. I was sure you had it.” He starts positioning his fingers around the guitar’s neck. “I don’t get it, you barely even play guitar. Why did you take it?”

I took it because you love your guitar. Because it was a piece of you I could take with me, even if it was a really selfish move.

“I don’t know, I just took it on a whim” I answer, to what he just shrugs.

Approximatively 30 seconds after he started playing, Malakai storms into the room, naked and still wet from his shower, with only a towel that loosely covers his lower part.

“You play guitar?” He asks Liam, before turning to me, “since when do you have a guitar?”

Malakai loves music, he writes and plays guitar a little bit. He learned it when he was in high school with his music teacher. He never had enough money to buy one, so he hasn’t touched a guitar since he entered university.

“It’s not his guitar, he stole it from me,” Liam responds, looking at me to make me feel guilty. “And yes, I play guitar. Do you play as well?”

Malakai nods, “I used to, but I really want to learn again!”

“I can teach you if you want.”

Malakai’s eyes sparkle, and with a huge smile, he says that he will be right back, probably leaving us to get dressed.

They spent the whole night together playing guitar in the living room. I could hear them laugh as horrible sounds came out of the guitar. But after a few hours, I could hear how much Malakai had improved. He is a really fast learner. He can master anything he wishes in a short period of time, which I am very envious of. I am a good student because I work my ass off for it. Malakai just has to read something to understand it and memorize it. This kid has a gift.

****

It’s around 1am, I am finally about to go to sleep when someone knocks at my door. I straighten up, hoping it’s Liam.

A human-sized carrot comes in and sits on my bed, facing me.

“Is Liam sleeping on the couch tonight?” He asks, whispering.

“Yeah, I am afraid he will snore again.”

“Bullsh*t.”

I raise my eyebrows.

“Just a reminder, I live in the apartment now. Also, crazy thing really, but I have eyes and a brain.”

“Crazy thing indeed” I answer, to which he gives me the middle finger.

“Did something happen between the two of you? Did you have a fight?” He is still whispering.

“Sort of, why are you asking?” This is very unusual. Malakai and I are close, but not that close.

“Okay this is going to get cringey and embarrassing for a second,” he says, I nod and he continues, “this situation is making me mad. You are making me mad”.

I raise my eyebrows. “Excuse me?”

“So clearly something is going on between the two of you. I don’t know if you dumbass realized, but the guy is clearly into you-”

Well damn Malakai, pop off.

“- and I know you, I am pretty sure you are rejecting him for some unknown and stupid reasons. I’ve seen you with many people, and he is the only one that I actually like.”

“Oh, so I should get over myself and date him, for you” I answer sarcastically. 

“Yes. Because you have this super cool guy in the other room that actually likes you, and I-”, he takes a deep breath, “and I like a guy who’ll never like me back.”

This is the first time that he admits having feelings for Noah. It’s also the first time we have a real conversation just the two of us, which doesn’t involve one of us annoying the other.

This is really brave of him. I can see his face getting red, his eyes avoiding me.

“That’s why I am mad,” he continues, looking at his lap, “I know it’s childish and embarrassing, but I am done living here with this non-stop sexual tension, like c’mon, there is a limit to how much I can third wheel. Please go apologize.”

I laugh, I didn’t know Malakai could sense that. Actually, I never thought I would ever have such a conversation with him.

“How do you know I am the one who has to apologize?” 

“You are an open book.”

I chuckle, “wait, I am an open book?”

He stands up, “Get your ass up and apologize. Besides, I feel like sleeping on your couch will take off 10 years of his life. Your couch sucks.”

“Well roomie, can’t wait for you to buy us a new one!”

He pulls out his tongue at me then leaves the room.

This stupid carrot head is right.

I said some stupid things without really explaining what’s on my mind and I diminished his feelings.

Ugh, but I hate apologizing, it’s so lame.

I take a deep breath and get out of the room and head to the living room. There, Liam is sitting on the couch, scrolling on his phone. He looks up at me before putting his phone on the table.

“Can we talk?” I ask. He nods and I sit on the table in front of him.

I take another deep breath, “I am sorry for what I said earlier. I didn’t explain myself properly. Back in our hometown people made fun of me for liking men. My dad and brothers pretty much bullied me for it, and as much as it is hard to admit, it really affected me. It was a really hard time and I don’t want you to go through that. So I invented some bullsh*t reasons why you shouldn’t like me. But that’s not my place, it’s your choice, not mine.”

He gets his back off the couch to put his elbows on his lap, getting closer to me.

“Also, I keep remembering what happen with.. uhm..”

I can’t even say his name, gosh this sucks.

He sees that I am struggling, so he puts his hand on my lap, “Adriel, it’s okay, I understand. I am sorry I got mad at you.”

I shake my head, “no, you were right. If only I had explained it better then, but you know me, I am an idiot.”

He laughs and I continue, “So, you can sleep in my room again, if you want.”

“Please, this couch is the worst.” He says, with a warm smile.

We both get back into my bedroom, and slide under the sheets.

“And when I leave, I will give my guitar to Malakai. The kid clearly has a gift.”

I know right??

****

Because it was the holidays, Liam and I tried to stay home as much as possible, which made no sense to Noah and Malakai who had big plans.

They still convinced us to go to the amusement park again on Wednesday, the only day Malakai wasn’t working. When Noah asked I thought Liam would be completely against it, but after he looked at me as if I had refused to give him his favorite toy, I figured that he can’t resist an amusement park day. We made sure Malakai didn’t do any of the hardcore rides and had a really fun day.

Although we were really tired, we stayed for the night parade. We couldn’t say no to Noah, as he loves the night parade so much. But when we arrived, so many people were already waiting for it, we could barely see anything. Noah got so upset, that Malakai just grabbed his hand and powered through the crowd to get him closer, followed by Liam and me. We could hear people mutter in anger as we pushed them, with Liam apologizing to everyone. We still couldn’t get in front of it, so Malakai carried Noah on his back so he could see the parade better. It was fun to see him wave at every mascot of the park. In this euphoria of cheering and colors, I felt Liam hold my hand. When I looked at him he just kept on watching the parade. I just squeezed it before watching the parade again, where a guy in a big rabbit costume was doing cartwheels.

The next day, Malakai confronted his father again. He told him he wasn’t coming back, and they didn’t have to “care” for him anymore. He told us his dad was angry at him for smashing his nose - which he had to go to the hospital to get fix for - so he was glad Malakai was out of the house, he didn’t want to have anything to do with him anymore. Malakai told me he was relieved, although I did see a glimpse of sadness in his words. But at least it’s official now, Malakai is my roommate and we’ll have to decide on common grounds, otherwise it’s going to be explosive. But now he is free to do whatever he wants. He told us he wanted to work in order to find a place for himself after he was done with university, he seems to have big plans for his future, and we were all four included in them.

Today is Friday, the first of the month, which means it’s movie night. Although Malakai lives here, and Noah has been sleeping over almost all week, tonight is still special. It’s also the second movie night of Liam, and possibly the last. This time, we decided to watch a comedy, we don’t know which one yet, which means Malakai and I will fight over the remote tonight while reviewing the whole Netflux catalogue.

This morning, I wake up with a bad feeling, like something bad is going to happen soon and I won’t be able to control it. I look over my shoulder to Liam, but he is already up. I decide to brush off this feeling and join everyone else in the kitchen.

Unfortunately, I shouldn’t have brushed off this feeling so easily.

[Chapter 13]

 Since the discussion Liam and I had, he has been a bit distant. Not like he seems mad, but more as if he was being careful, constantly walking on eggshells. I think he doesn’t want to push anything on me and give me space, which I appreciate. The question is, for how long is it going to last? Is this our relationship now?

I’d rather not think about this too much, after all, Liam is not staying here, nothing is going to happen between us. As soon as my brothers are out of the city, we will part ways and possibly never see each other again.

It’s around 4pm and Noah decided that we should play Monopoly. Little did he know, it was going to be a never-ending war between Malakai and me. He keeps on going on my very expensive properties and blames me for it somehow, as if I had bribed the dice. Thus, I am the richest, then Malakai, and finally Liam and Noah. The fact Liam is poor in this game is very funny to me because his family is even richer than mine. Liam struggling to pay bills is the funniest thing I’ve seen all week.