I kind of understood what Mal was talking about. My omega fights for control often, but I’ve never lost complete control over myself. Omegas are known to either go into a mating frenzy that’s unrivaled, or they shut down and ball up. Alphas become extremely aggressive and mate anyone that crosses their path. There is no other option for an alpha in that state. Betas are lucky that they don’t have to worry about any of this, but there are two other less common subgenders that can sometimes struggle with this.

These subgenders are fairly rare, and don’t usually cause any issues to the balance of society as most people won’t be able to identify them as deltas or gammas, but rather just assume they are one of the main trio.

Deltas are the subgender between beta and alpha. It’s as if deltas are the combination of the two. Territorial and aggressive, but not as strong and sexually propelled as an alpha. Gammas are the subgender between beta and omega. Again, it’s as if they are a combination of the two. Gammas are unable to sense or make their own pheromones so usually go undetected and get labeled as betas. However, they can become pregnant and have the maternal instincts of an omega.

When Deltas lose control of themselves, they go into blind rages and become more territorial than normal. They usually go around marking everything and trying to fight off any alphas and other deltas. Gammas become extremely maternal when they lose to their gammas and are known to take children and babies from others when this occurs.

The room fell into an awkward silence. Knowing that Maelstrom had lost to his alpha was a bit scary. It meant he was capable of losing control and that meant my purity was on the line if he ever lost control. Then there was the implications of knowing he had raped at least one person before. There is no way that an alpha that lost control would not have knotted at least one person.

Thinking about Maelstrom’s virginity was weird, but it wasn’t uncommon for alphas to have already had sex before college. It’s usually with beta because there is no risk of pregnancy. It’s also not uncommon for omegas to have lost their virginity by the time they are in college, but again it’s usually to a controlled beta because they are more likely to use protection.

It was embarrassing to wonder about Maelstrom’s sex life, but some how that’s where my mind landed. I was curious if he had ever had a sex partner or if he had only been with someone by force. I wanted to ask him, but I also didn’t know how to ask.

It felt like I would be prying too much, and we hardly knew each other. Not to mention, if I asked about his sex life, he was surly going to ask about mine. Thinking about his sex life then led me to a completely differnt road. Maelstrom was a handsome alpha, and being with him would probably feel good. I could feel the blush rise in my face the more I thought about this.

“What’s got you all blushy?” Maelstrom questioned me.

“Nothing.” I squeaked.

Maelstrom laughed. “Nothing you say.”

I was panicking a little. Could he tell what I was thinking? Then, I realized that he could smell it; I was releasing pheromones. I could feel my whole body flush at the realization.

I quickly stood up and walked into the bathroom. I was about to take my clothes off when I realized that I didn’t grab anything fresh to put on after a shower. The panic was really beginning to set in at this point.

I couldn’t go back out. That would be embarrassing, but I couldn’t just ask him to bring me clothes either. That’s just weird. I was trapped.

“Hey. Are you okay? I didn’t mean to upset you.” He asked me through the door.

I was unable to answer. I wasn’t upset; I was mortified. It was only our first day together, and I already released pheromones indicating my arousal.

When I didn’t answer him, he casually announced, “I’m going to go for another walk. I’ll come back in an hour.”

I heard the door open and close as he left or dorm again. His actions made me even more mortified because I knew why he was leaving. He thought he was doing me a favor by leaving so I could “take care” of myself in private.

Thankfully, I wasn’t aroused anymore at this point. Those feelings had all been replaced with panic. I cautiously opened the bathroom door and made my way to the dresser to pull out some clothes. I opened the drawer with my pajamas and slid back into the bathroom. Then, for the second time that day, I took a quick shower.

It felt nice feeling the water cascade over my back and onto the shower floor. It was soothing and helped to relax me from my embarrassing evening. I reluctantly stepped out of the shower to dry off and get dressed.

Once in my pajamas, I left the bathroom and curled up in my bed. I was hoping I would fall asleep by the time Maelstrom came back, but I was still wide awake when he walked in.

The lights were off, but I could still see him as he crossed the room. It took a moment to register, but he was still in only his shorts. He had gone for a walk almost naked. He could have put a shirt on, so why didn’t he?

“Did you really go out like that?” I asked.

“Like what?” he asked back.

“Why are you like that?”

“Like what?”

“That.”

“What is that?”

“You answer my questions with questions.”

He turned to face me in the dark. I knew he could see me too since his eyes had plenty of time to adjust to the darker room. “Oh, you mean that. It’s a habit. My mother and I do that to each other. I’m sorry if it bothers you. I don’t really mean to do it; I just do.”

“So why didn’t you put on more clothes before going on a walk?”

“Didn’t feel like it. Besides, what's wrong with going out in just shorts?”

“Don’t you feel like you're exposing yourself?”

He laughed at me. “Why would I? All the important stuff is covered.”

“But don’t you think that someone might try to make a pass at you?”

He laughed at me again. “I’m not some omega. Who is going to make a pass at me? An Alpha? Na. A Beta? Maybe but there is no threat there. An omega? Potentially, but why would they. Omegas avoid encounters like that unless they're in heat and then why would an omega in heat be out at this time. And any omega outside would be under a suppressant, so I don’t see the issue.”

I recoiled a little at his comment about not being “some omega” but decided to push past it and push the issue further. “But didn’t you say you don’t know if you could control yourself if I were to rub up on you?” I didn’t mean for it to sound the way it did, and it caused me to blush.

“You’re different though.” He stopped abruptly and to my surprise he blushed before speaking again, “I mean yeah, it’d be hard to control myself if someone is rubbing against me, but it's easier to push away advances if I don’t know the person.”

“I don’t see how you can be so comfortable walking around in just a pair of shorts.”

“I don’t work on my muscles to just keep them to myself. I like to show them off a bit. Walking around without a shirt is just one way to show off.”

“You’re a total alpha.” I snorted.

“Do you have a problem with that little puppy?”

I snorted again, “Puppy? Where did that come from?”

“Come on don’t tell me you can’t figure it out. You’re like a cute, scared puppy. It makes me want to take you home, give you somewhere warm to sleep, feed you, and keep you protected.”

I was rolling in laughter at this point. I wasn’t even able to tell if he was being serious or not. “Oh my god. You are one hundred percent an alpha.”

“How would you know? You don’t even hang around alphas.” he stuck his tongue out.

“No I don’t, but you sound so textbook right now.”

Maelstrom gave me a smirk before approaching me. He grabbed my chin and pulled it up to his face, making my heart skip a beat. “Do you want to find out how textbook I am?”

I blushed as he looked me directly in the eyes. My heart was racing, but for some reason I didn’t want to run. He let go of my chin before walking over to his bed. I wasn’t sure what happened or why, but I wish the moment hadn’t ended.

He got into his bed while I was grasping for something to say after that. I wanted to say something, but didn’t know what to say.

Maelstrom was the one to break the silence. “You didn’t react the way I was expecting you to.”

“How did you think I was going to react?” I questioned.

“I was expecting you to recoil from my touch and move away, but instead, you acted like an interested omega.”

I blushed. I was interested in him, but I wasn’t sure what kind of interest it was. I looked away from him, trying to hide my embarrassment at being caught.

“You don’t have to be embarrassed about it. It’s okay to be interested in someone. It’s just you might want to not be interested in me. It’s not going to turn out good if you fall for me.”

Was he already rejecting me? I would be lying if I said that it didn’t hurt. “Just shut up. I’m not interested in you. I’m just confused by being so friendly with an alpha. I can’t help how I react sometimes.”

“Alright. Just don’t fall for me, okay? I’m not the alpha you want to go for.”

I was confused by his statement. He acts nice, but then he says things like that, making me wonder what he’s done in the past to make him hold himself in such little regard. I wanted to ask him about it, but I was scared of what he would tell me. I was also scared it would ruin what little friendship we had just built.

“I’m not trying to be mean to you. But things could get messy if you fall for your roommate. You should get some sleep. You’ve had a stressful day.”

“Yeah. Okay. Night.” I meekly said as I felt my heart splitting.

I didn’t know why it hurt so much. I wasn’t in love with him. Or at least, I didn’t think I was. Maybe it was just my omega shining through just a little. I didn’t want Maelstrom in that way. I just wanted to be his friend.

I listened to him and tried to fall asleep again. It felt like ages before I actually drifted to sleep. Unfortunately, it was a restless sleep. I tossed and turned as I fell out of dreams and nightmares.