"So, how did last night go?" Hannah asks me the next morning while making coffee.

"I don't really want to talk about it, Han." I mumble into my coffee.

She makes a face at me, and I sigh.

"Seriously, I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay, fine." She surrenders, holding her hands up. "But I'm here if you do."

"I know."

"Hey, how'd your date go?" Jeremiah asks as he walks into the kitchen. I roll my eyes and chuckle quietly. Of course, they would gang up on me.

"Fine. I'll tell you. He and I went to the demolition zone and broke a whole bunch of stuff. Then I had an anxiety attack and essentially blamed him for my life falling apart." I spoke. "That is how my date went."

"Oh, honey. I'm sorry." Hannah replies, and I wave it off, heading towards the door.

"I'm fine. I guess it just wasn't going to work out for us again."

"You don't know that, maybe it will." Hannah says, and I roll my eyes. "Hey, all I'm saying is to not give up so easily. He's had a lot happen to him over the last five years, Cas."

"So, you're defending him?" I ask, bewildered. "He ruined my life, Hannah!"

"Okay, hold on a second. Yeah, he made a shitty decision and left without telling you he was joining the military. But you also made the shitty decision to completely cut him out of your life, Cas. You wouldn't let us say his name for the first few months!" Hannah exclaims, and I scoff. "You know I'm right, Cas."

"Hannah-"

"No. I'm going to stand right here and I'm going to tell it like it is. Stop waiting for things to go back to normal. You both have changed, him through the military and you through music. Use it and help each other."

I stand in the doorway, silent, and I think about what she said.

"You know I'm right, Cas. Now, what are you going to do about it?"

"I'm going to go to the store." I say quietly, and I walk out, grabbing the keys to the Jeep. I feel a lump forming in my throat as I climb into the car. As I pull away from the house, I push memories out of my mind and keep driving. Part of me knows that Hannah is right. We've grown up. We aren't in high school, having to hide our relationship. If anything, this town is more open to the queer community than it was before I left town. Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe Dean and I can work. I'm shaken out of my head when my phone rings, and I see that its Gabe calling.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Cas! So, how was the date?"

"No, not you too!" I groan, and I hear Gabe chuckle. "What did Hannah tell you?"

"Nothing. Sam told me." He said, and I'm shocked.

"Sam? Sam Winchester?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Since when do you and him engage in conversation?"

"Cas, we've been dating for the last few months. Didn't I tell you that?"

My eyes widen at the news. "YOU"VE BEEN WHAT?!"

"Yeah. I thought I told you?"

"NO, NO YOU DID NOT!"

"Okay, quit yelling, you're hurting my ears." He complains, and I scoff.

"Are you at your apartment?"

"Yes... why?"

"I'll be there in a few minutes. You and I need to talk."

...................................................................................................................................

When I arrive at Gabe's apartment, I'm fuming. Partly because I felt hurt that Gabe wouldn't tell me that he's in a relationship, but also because of the blatant fact that I was interested in the other half of the Winchester duo and that would be an awkward series of events. I knock on his door, and Gabe immediately holds his hands up  in surrender. 

"Before you kill me, will you just hear us out?"

"Us?"

"Yeah, us." I hear, and I'm surprised to see Sam standing behind Gabe. 

"Look, we will tell you everything. Just, sit down, please?"

"Okay, fine." I sit down on the couch, and watched as Gabe and Sam moved smoothly around each other. Even though I was angry, it was nice to see that Gabe found someone, someone that truly cared about him. He deserves that much after the shitty life we lived. They sit across from me, and I can sense Gabe was a little uncomfortable. 

"Look, before we talk, I just want to let you know that I'm not actually mad, mad. It's just...I thought we told each other stuff like this, Gabe."

"We do, Cas. It's not that we didn't trust you, it just happened so fast that we didn't know what to tell people. We we're going to tell everyone at the Christmas party next week, actually." Gabe looks at Sam and smiles, and I feel a little guilty for being mad. 

"Oh, wow. I'm sorry, I guess I ruined your surprise." I say, and Gabe smiles at me. 

"It's okay." Gabe stands up and walks to the stove, where his boiling tea kettle was whistling. "Seeing as you're now involved with the other Winchester-"

"No, no I'm not." I object, and this time, Sam responds.

"You're not? Dean said that you guys went out last night-"

"And it didn't go well. Just like I thought it would."

"That's not what he told me." 

"What?"

"Yeah. Even though the night ended badly, he enjoyed every minute of it, Cas." Sam responded, and I'm shocked. I blamed him for everything wrong with my life, and he enjoyed the night?

"Cas, all he wants is a second chance."

"I don't know if I can do that."

"Why? What's stopping you from giving him a chance?" Gabe says, sitting back down on the couch next to Sam. "You guys were inseparable before-"

"Before he left for the Marines and ditched me without saying anything?"

"Cas-"

"Gabe, you know I'm right."

"I know, but still. He loved you, Cas."

"And he still does." Sam remarks. For a hot second, I'm speechless.

"What?"

"Last night, all he talked about was when he left all those years ago. He never wanted to leave, Cas. He never wanted to join the Marines unless you were okay with it, but because my Dad is a complete asshole, he was forced to."

"I know that-"

"Just...listen." Sam says, and he nods to Gabe. Gabe leaves the living room, so it's just Sam and I.

"What I'm about to show you is between you and I, no one else is to know about it, okay?"

"Yeah...okay." I say. Sam shifts in his seat, and clears his throat. 

"Dean... had a hard time when he came home. He stayed with me until he could move into his own apartment, but every night he would have the same nightmare."

"What was the nightmare?"

"He would start screaming your name, and it sounded like his heart was being ripped out of his chest. I think he imagined that you were over there and being tortured or something."

"Oh my god...I had no idea this was happening."

"How would you have known? He isn't open about it. He barely told me, I had to pry it out of him."

"What do I do?"

"Be patient with him. He doesn't show it, but he's in pain."

I sit back, and rethink everything that happened last night. Did he clue me in last night while we were in the car?

"Cas, I know that you both have some serious baggage. But give him another chance, would you?"

"Sam..."

"Please. It's as much for his sake as it is mine. Who knows? Maybe you'll find that you guys still are made for each other."

Yeah, maybe...