Chapter 13: The Pool

Noah

“Does it hurt?” Rain asked.

“Only when I try to stop it,” I replied. 

“How often do you stop it?” 

“Too often.”

Rain and I stood at the deep end of the local pool.  A few weeks ago, we both stood in this place as strangers. Now, we stand here as something more. We were more than friends, but not quite lovers. Whatever feelings described what I felt for him were strong enough to show him something I had only ever willingly shown one person before. 

“How does it work?” Rain asked. 

“I just kind of let go, in a way,” I said. 

Rain looked at me with confusion. I didn’t know how to explain how shifting worked.

“It’s like,” I paused, “I think of being free, and then it happens.”

He nodded his head. “You don’t have to if it’s going to hurt—”

I shushed his words by putting my finger to his lips. I had already decided that I was going to show myself to him. Rain’s entire face flushed, and I smiled. It was probably a stupid-looking smile, but I didn’t care. I wanted Rain to know that I enjoyed it when he blushed. 

Suddenly, Rain’s hand reached up and grabbed mine, and then he planted the softest kiss at the tip of my finger. I wanted my lips to take the place of my hand. We were alone now, and I could go all out with the flirting. I dragged my finger down his lips and stepped closer. 

“I need to take my clothes off,” I said, a hair's width away from his lips. Rain’s hands had gripped my waist, and his eyes had closed. His face became redder the longer I lingered near his lips. 

I tugged at the end of my work shirt and peeled it off. I wanted Rain’s hands to explore my body, but his hands stayed on my waist. His thumbs started making the same circular motions that he did earlier on my thumbs, but this time on my hips. My body drifted to his. My face nuzzled in the crook of his neck. When I exhaled, Rain trembled. He let out a deep exhale and tightened his grip on my waist. I took pride in knowing that he had a sensitive neck. 

“Can I kiss you?” He asked.

My mind was buzzing from our bodies pressed together, but I managed to speak. 

“Yes.” I wanted his lips on mine.

I wrapped my arms around Rain’s neck. One of Rain’s hands cupped my face then he leaned in. The kiss was shy. I opened my mouth slightly, desperately wanting Rain to deepen our kiss. It took a minute, but soon his tongue slid against mine. I let out a relieved sigh. Fuck. My body arched against Rain on instinct. I waited weeks for this moment. Even though I enjoyed our flirty video calls, they couldn’t satisfy me. Not like this. The moment Rain kissed me, I felt like I was the only person in the world. 

With every smooth slide of his tongue, fireworks went off in my head. His kisses became less shy as the seconds passed. When I pulled away, we both were gasping for air. The kiss was more intense than either of us intended. 

“Are you getting in the pool with me?” I asked between breaths. 

Rain thought about his answer for a moment, his breathing just as uneven as mine.

“I’d have to take my hearing aids off, so I won’t be able to hear you well.”

He stared at me as he began to pull his shirt over his head. My breathing was even until he finished with his actions. When I viewed his bare chest, my breath caught in my throat. There was so much skin my fucking brain stopped working. The hold Rain had on me was indescribable. Just looking at him wiped all thought from my mind.

We turned away from each other when we took off our pants. Rain and I walked over to the bleachers by the exit and placed our clothes there. When Rain was taking off his hearing aids, I took the opportunity to strip and jump in the pool. 

The water greeted me like an old friend. Welcomed me. It was always peaceful at the bottom of this pool. I was free. Nothing—no one—could hurt me down here. I drifted to the floor of the pool and shut my eyes. 

My senses heightened in the water; I could feel the ripples of the water when Rain entered the pool. I relaxed my body and let the shift take over. There was only a little pain during the crack and slide of my muscles and bones. The fusion of my legs creating my tail usually hurt the most, but I allowed it. I allowed everything. Not holding back. My dad used to tell me that being like this was my natural form. I was a siren. Walking around on two feet had always been the artificial me. I was born to be one with the water. The pain in my lower back was dull, but I ignored it and swam to Rain.

The water gliding off my body was a euphoric event. I felt more like myself. Slowly, I peeked over the water, trying not to startle Rain with my less than human appearance. I was suddenly feeling insecure. He gazed at me, taking in my entire self. He didn’t look at me with hate. Or with fear. Rain swam around me to get a better look. I held my breath when he ducked his head underwater to view my tail and fins. When he resurfaced, he looked into my eyes. The way his eyes studied my face was a look I wasn’t used to getting. And I think I looked at him in the same way. 

“I thought you’d be afraid of the way I looked,” I said. 

Rain’s fingers lightly traced my lips. “Can you say that again?” He asked. 

And I did. I  was helpless not to. I wanted Rain to keep looking at me in that way.

Rain studied each movement of my lips when I spoke. 

“Why?” He replied.

“It’s just…the last time I did this for someone…” I stopped speaking when I felt a sudden lump in my throat when I swallowed. I tilted my head back to stop tears from falling down my face. Why was I letting a dumb past teenage romance make me cry? 

Rain’s hands had cupped my face again, bringing my attention back to him. His thumb brushed against my ear fin, and I whined. I actually whined, not expecting the feeling to be so intense on sensitive skin. Then his lips found mine again. This time the kiss was slower, with more intent, more feeling. The way he kissed me made me believe that I was important. That my presence was something that he longed for, that I was alive.

Rain pulled away and looked down into the clear water of the pool. “Your…tail?”

 I followed the directions of his eyes into the water where my tail had wrapped around his body. I hadn’t even noticed his wet body pressed against me. It was different having someone on me while I was in this form. I didn’t hate it. It was just different. 

“Does it feel weird?” I asked. Even though this was how I looked naturally, I felt shy. No one ever saw me when I shifted. My family members had only seen it a handful of times. 

Rain stopped looking at my tail and focused on my face. I noticed straight away that he was looking at my lips instead of my eyes. I took that as he wanted me to repeat what I asked, and I did. I didn’t mind repeating myself as long as he understood. 

He shook his head, and my tail wrapped tighter on him, bringing his face close to mine again. And then I saw something that made me blink hard. I could barely believe what I was seeing. Rain smiled. Not only smiled,  but he also laughed. It was one of those huffing laughs. It happened so quickly and directed at me. I wondered if he heard the cute laugh that came from his mouth. There was wonder in his eyes when he looked at me, like a little kid seeing a cheap magic trick for the first time. I leaned in again and kissed him. Rain seemed surprised at first, but he wrapped his arms around my body and kissed me back. I could feel his lips turn into a smile as my tail fin flapped happily. 

We ducked underwater, feeling playful. I beckoned for Rain to follow me. I swam to the bottom of the pool and looked up, and waited for Rain. He was a pretty good swimmer, which made sense because he had his scuba certification. His long hair trailed behind him, and when he came to a stop above me, it swiveled around his face. I closed the gap by giving him a quick kiss. Rain’s hand found my waist. He pulled me close, refusing to let me escape with just a small kiss. Bubbles floated all around us the longer we kissed. I wanted to stay down here with Rain forever, but unlike him, I could breathe underwater. My tail fin slowly guided us back to the surface, our mouths never leaving each other. 

Rain gasped for air at the surface, but he was smiling again. I took a photo with my brain. I’ll remember it for infinity. 

This was what living felt like.