CHAPTER 3

WONDERING

“Lex. I know you didn’t want to tell me before, and probably still don’t want to, but why do you hate Angels so much that you can eradicate us whilst feeling nothing?”
“It doesn’t really matter, does it?” Lex replied with a snarl.
“Of course it does!” Anouke wailed indignantly.
“Because I don’t want to be hurt again, okay?! So, stop bugging me about this,” he admitted without realizing. “I’m scared, okay?” He whispered dejectedly and covered his whole face with his slim hand.

Lex watched the searing fire. His eyes quivered as the shadows danced around the room, ignited from the flames. Caught in the moment, he narrowed his eyes as if gazing at a distant dream from the past. “I’m going to sleep,” Lex informed Anouke, lying down on the couch. Anouke got up from the floor, where he was sitting by and tending the fire, and sat on the chair so he could watch over Lex.

After a few hours of watching, Anouke’s eyes began to feel heavy. He stood up from the chair and walked to the window which Lex kept attempting to run away from. Night had fallen upon the forest, faint and murky shadows cast across the leaf-littered floor. The dilapidated branches from the shabby trees caused the obscurity of the shadows to look like behemoths were crawling out from under the ground. He looked over at Lex, watching with fascination as his chest slowly rose and fell.

“I’ll change you, Lex. I have too…” He murmured, walking back over and sitting on the chair. Anouke wouldn’t sleep; he couldn’t. After all, he had a responsibility now. He sat on the chair and stared at the ceiling whilst recalling the events of what happened before Lex had fallen asleep.

“There we go,” Anouke sighed with relief, finally getting the fire to settle perfectly.
“I had a friend – Dayle – before. When I was younger, I was determined to change all demons for the better and he helped along with it until he got older and his ideals changed. When he realized that only a small percentage of them was changeable, he stopped--”
 “Changeable? What do you mean ‘changeable’? All Demons aren’t changeable? How do you know which ones are?”
“Well, you see… Look at your wings.” Anouke advised and he did.
“What about them?” Lex questioned impatiently.

“See how some scales are white, yeah? If Demons have those on their wings, it means they’re changeable.”
“How so?” Lex sat down on the disfigured couch.
“Ah, so basically,” Anouke inhaled and puffed out air as if he was smoking a cigar, “If their scales are detraining or white – maybe faded like some of yours - then that means they’re just coming to their humane senses. In other words, your wings are degrading. And that means you’re becoming either more humane or Angelic.” He paused and pointed to Lex’s wings. “See the scales on your wings near the very bottom? The white ones I mean. That shows you’re becoming more Angelic.” Anouke rubbed the bridge of his nose. “You just need ‘a bit’ of a nudging in the right direction if you get what I’m saying.” He sighed.
“Oh, and if you’re becoming a human, their wings would be disappearing instead of fading away or becoming white.”

“I see.” Lex said and placed his cool palm on the bare nape of his neck, pressing his fingertips into his skin like he was massaging it.
“Anyways, back to my story about my friend. I vowed to change the changeable Demons. I know I don’t really know anything about Demons, I- I still don’t. My brothers – which you killed – had told me about others being murdered by the organization known as ‘The Angels Antagonism.’” Anouke looked thoughtful and looked at Lex with wide yet focused eyes. “I didn’t believe them.”

“You’re so naïve.” Lex interrupted by speaking his mind.
“I hadn’t finished. As I was saying, ‘I didn’t believe them’ until I met you. You tried to kill me. So, I owe it to my brothers to at least change one Demon.” He looked down at the floor. Night was creeping through the day promptly. Lex didn’t say anything but just looked at Anoukes hands. They were trembling.

Anouke looked at the plain ceiling then back at Lex. He was so vulnerable right now. He walked over to Lex and leaned over his body, observing his face.
“Even a Demon lets their guard down, huh?” Anouke smiled. “I hope we can become friends, Lex. For the time being at least.” He strolled back over to the chair by the fireplace. The fire was still lit, the only source of light in the dull house. The lights had been turned out and darkness was eating away at the little amount of light left outside.

Thinking about it, Angels and Demons are similar to day and night. It’s like a battle for territory. Anouke thought to himself and touched the bottom of his chin ever so slightly with his index finger. I wish you heard what I said, Lex. You could be a good friend.

“Morning, Lex,” Anouke beamed cheerfully. His face was tired though.
“Uh, morning.”
“I got no sleep last night! Was watching over you.”
“I see.”
“Hungry? Thirsty?” Anouke offered, holding out a mug which had written in a bold font ‘NUMER ONE!’ Lex looked at it closely.

“I’ll have whatever you’ve got to drink.”
“Gotcha. Water fine with you?” Anouke asked as he pulled the tap lever and the water squeaked out into the mug. “Fine with me, I suppose,” Lex murmured. Anouke flipped the mug around in his hand like a barista. His fingers gripped the tap lever and pulled it again, water dripping into the sink until no more dropped from the tap’s mouth. “Oh. You haven’t got your wings out, Lex!”
“They’re in the way.”
“You really aren’t much of a talker, huh?” Anouke said and Lex shrugged, silent. “Hm.”
“Your wings getting in the way, too? You never have them out.” Anouke strolled towards Lex and handed him the ‘NUMBER ONE!’ mug with tap water in.

“No, not really. You’ve already seen my wings before - doubt you really actually saw them though since you were so determined to kill me – but I just don’t usually have them out. I suppose you could say it’s a habit of mine or something.”
“I see.”

“Is that all you say, Lex?” Anouke chuckled, covering his mouth with his hand, covered by the robe which draped over his fingers. He shrugged again and sighed.
“Maybe,” Lex muttered.
“Aren’t you hungry, Lex?”
"That depends on what food you’ve got.”
“Well, nothing cold. I have tinned food, though.”
“That won’t suffice for me,” Lex huffed and folded his arms, looping his left leg over his right and leant back on the sofa. “Then, what do you want to eat?” Anouke frowned.
“I think you know.” Lex murmured, looking at Anouke with a hostile glance.

“Sorry, sorry.” Anouke turned away with a non-strained smile, feeling like he accomplished something by ‘teasing’ him. “You’re really interesting, Lex.” Anouke said aloud, standing on his tip-toes to reach the cupboards which were a little too high for him. He leant against the kitchen counter, hand searching through the cupboard for a tin.

They were too far back. He grunted. Lex came forward and leant against the wall whilst stifling a laugh at Anouke’s failure. “Struggling a bit?”
“I’ve nearly got it!” Anouke cheered and tried to grab a tin which was just at his fingertips. Whilst stretching his fingertips to touch it, he pushed it further away. Anouke slumped down on the kitchen counter and sighed.

“Perhaps I am struggling a little.”
“No wonder you’re so boney, you can’t even reach your food,” Lex said, half joking and half serious. He still leant against the kitchen wall, not stepping forward to help.
“You just gonna… stand there? Could you help me, Lex? You’re taller than me.”
“Why would I help you?”
“Yeah, good point. I don’t know what I was expecting from you.” Anouke turned around to look at Lex. He took a peek at his wings which were now out. There were more white scales. It bought a smile to his face.

“What’re you smiling at, bastard?” Lex growled.
“Nothing,” he snickered.
“Shut up and tell me, prick!”
“Eh? ‘Shut up and tell me’? How can I shut up but tell you at the same--”
“Don’t be an ass.”
“My, if you didn’t have your wings out, I’d have thought you were becoming more demonic judging by your personality, haha.”
“Stop laughing, idiot!” Lex groaned.

Anouke exhaled a snigger through his nose and put his weight against the kitchen counter. He placed both his hands on the top of it and looked at Lex. “You’re funny.”
“Shut up.” Lex responded, flustered. “The hell was you even laughing at me for in the first place?”
“I take it you haven’t had a look at your wings then.”
“Eh?” Lex stared at the bottom of his wings – there were really more white scales and some other faded ones. Shit. Lex frowned. If I don’t start killing more Angels, I’ll become one myself… No, no. No, I can’t let that happen! I can’t! “So that’s why you were laughing.”
“Yup. It’s good news.”
“Maybe for you,” Lex replied.