I still couldn’t believe the week I’d had. I’d thought I was having a nice, peaceful Sunday evening with a handsome man with great humor, but it had turned into one of the worst nightmares I’d ever had to live through in a blink of an eye. I’d been too mesmerized by his good looks to even notice the stale hint in the blood he’d offered.

I’d spent the past week cursing myself and my naive stupidity. I had entered the trap willingly, giving my enemy free hands to do whatever they wanted with me, just because I got blinded by their assassins’ looks.

I was lucky to be alive. I was lucky I had managed to escape, and I certainly was lucky that it was Riley who found me, no one else. Not only did he save my life by bringing me here, he also kept me safe by not taking me to a hospital. His soothing words and touches had kept me sane through my pain, and his company had given me comfort while I was unable to even get out of bed.

And his blood was healing me. Every time I had his blood coursing through my veins, the burning pain turned into mild discomfort, and my twisting stomach calmed down. I felt warm, and I felt strong for as long as it was his essence of life in me. The blood bags couldn’t do the same, not even close.

I was not a child of God anymore, but Riley had to be one of his angels, sent to save me in every way I needed to be saved.

I honestly wasn’t sure if I had made it through that first night here at the clinic without Riley. I still couldn’t believe I had made it through that horrible pain without dying or at least losing my humanity for good. Even the memory of the antidote burning the poison away made me want to crawl under the bed and die. It was the warmth of his green eyes that had helped me through it. Riley had given me a small way to escape and focus on something else. He’d given me hope. He’d managed to make me believe I only had to endure a moment longer.

He had convinced me that I would not die that night. He had given me the strength to not want to die.

And I was not repaying his kindness well. I was ashamed of accepting his help, and especially his blood. Especially since I couldn’t control myself when I drank from him.

I never should’ve let Riley feed me. In full health, it was easy to control my hunger, no matter how starved I was, but now… I was barely able to stop. I’d drank way too much of his blood during this past week already. Human bodies couldn’t recover fast enough, so if I made one more mistake like that, it would put him in danger.

And still he wanted to be my Feeder. I didn’t want to let him do that, but he refused to take a no for an answer.

“Here,” Mike spoke as he placed a big bottle of red pills on the table next to my bed and turned to look at Riley. “You need to take these every twelve hours for as long as you’re a Feeder. It doesn’t matter when, and it doesn’t matter if you forget one or two every now and then, but try not to.”

Riley nodded and picked up the bottle. “So they’re like… Iron supplements?”

“Not exactly. It’s a big cocktail of a lot of things, but the biggest ingredient is shapeshifter blood. Their kind can generate gallons of blood in a matter of seconds, you see. These pills will help your body generate the lost blood cells in hours, while normally it would take weeks. The effect lasts for about twelve hours, and it’s important to keep the regenerating process steady, or it will cause harm to your body in long-term use. There should be no side effects, but if you suddenly start growing black ulcers or abscesses, you need to stop using them. That is the only allergic reaction we know of, and it’s quite rare.”

“And what about the diet?” Riley asked.

“These pills already contain iron and different vitamins your body needs, but you should eat as much food that contains these things as well. But more importantly, you’ll also need to start eating nemjan seeds and garn cabbage while on these pills. Those two will protect your body and especially your bone marrow, where the blood cells are created. And you won’t be getting those in human grocery stores.”

“You don’t have to do this,” I told Riley.

“I want to do this,” he said, giving me a smile, and then turned back to Mike. “Where do I get these… uh…”

“Nemjan seeds and garn cabbage,” Mike repeated, took a piece of paper, and wrote down the names and the shops that sold them. And instructions on how to enter the shops since they weren’t always visible to the human eye. “I suggest you eat these just before you take the supplements. A handful of seeds and a few leaves of the cabbage is enough.”

Riley nodded and took the paper from him, then turned to look at me.

“You shouldn’t do this,” I told him quietly. “You are already being too kind to someone who you just met.”

“Sirius is not used to receiving help from anyone,” Mike told Riley. “He is grateful for your help.”

“Oh, shut up,” I told him.

Riley took my hand in his, his warm fingers brushing over my cold ones.

“I want to help,” he only said with a soft smile. “So I will.”

I let out a deep breath, shaking my head. “I seem to be unable to change your mind.”

“Do you want to change my mind?” he asked.

I didn’t want to reply to him. I took a closer look at his kind green eyes, his messy blond hair, his pretty face with lush lips, his soft, slim figure with nice, long limbs… I didn’t want to accept his kindness. Not with the thoughts I had about him.

And my lord, his blood was divine… Especially after that mud Mike called blood.

Riley’s smile grew wider when I didn’t reply. He knew I didn’t want to change his mind.

“I will pay for your food, the supplements, everything,” I told him.

“You don’t have to do–”

“That is unnegotiable,” I said sternly. “I will not let you spend a cent on me.”

He pressed his lips together in a stern manner, but let it go. “Fine.”

“The pills alone cost two hundred a month,” Mike butted in.

Riley turned to stare at him.

“Rare ingredients, you see.”

“I will pay for them,” I said. “The pills cost a lot less than blood bags, anyway.”

“How much are they?”

“About thirty bucks each.”

“Thirty bucks!” Riley repeated with wide eyes. “And you need how many?”

“At least one a day,” I shrugged. “That’s why a lot of us drink animal blood or go hunt for humans, which is strictly forbidden.”

“So… Basically you have to be rich in order to survive?” Riley said.

“Yeah… Although you are better off if you are part of a family. The older, the better. A lot of us have gained our riches over decades. A lonely vampire doesn’t really last long.”

His eyes turned sad when he watched me.

“I’m fine on my own,” I tried to tell him, but I could tell he didn’t believe me.

“Well that’s going to change,” he said.

What a strange young human…

“Here,” Mike said, fished out a small bag of seeds from his pocket and gave it to Riley. “You should start taking these right away. You don’t have enough blood in your system at the moment.”

Riley nodded, took the bag, and ate a mouthful of the seeds before taking the bottle of pills. Mike brought him a glass of water and we both watched while the human carefully swallowed one.

“The pill doesn’t taste very good,” Riley said, making funny faces. “I like the seeds though.”

“You’ll get used to it.” Mike grinned. “You should probably stay here for a while so I can keep an eye on you.”

“I have no better place to be,” Riley said, giving me a smile.

“And try to rest a little. Your body needs it,” Mike said and stood up. “Call me if you need anything.”

“Sure.”

“You should try to sleep for a bit,” I told him quietly.

“You should too,” he said as he lay down next to me, turning his big green eyes to me. “Are you still in pain?”

“I’m better now,” I muttered, turning toward him. “You have a lot of faith in me. I could be a complete monster.”

“Are you a complete monster?”

I smiled at the innocence of his voice. “No, I’m not.”

“Good,” he said, slowly placing his hand on mine between us. “I think you are a sweet man.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, so I just shrugged.

“Try to sleep now,” he told me in a whisper. “I’ll watch over you.”

I nodded, but closed my eyes reluctantly. I wanted to stare at him. I wanted to see him, not be forced to relive the horrible memories from a week ago. I listened to his heart and his breathing, trying not to remember being shackled to a wall… In pain and bleeding… But it was too late.

I couldn’t quite remember how I’d escaped. I had massive gaps in my memory between the moment I drank the poison and arriving here. I’d let my vampire side take the lead as I was too weak to help myself. I didn’t know if my enemy actually wanted me dead, or if they were planning on giving me the antidote, but I’d escaped before they could. I did remember fighting the man who had captured me. I must’ve stolen his keys, or he’d been stupid enough to free me.

I could only hope he was dead.

“Wait here. He’ll come to see you soon…”

Nasty shivers run down my spine when my captor’s words floated into my mind. I had not told Riley or Mike the entire truth. It was not just a territorial dispute, but I was not willing to talk about the rest of it. It was… too personal.

I wished they’d leave me alone already… This time I’d managed to escape, but they would try again. And again. I didn’t even want to know what would’ve happened to me if Riley hadn’t found me. There were only two options: they would’ve found me again, or I’d ended up dead. Dead man’s blood was a horrifying way to die, and I would still suffer from its effects even after several weeks.

I was grateful for Riley’s presence, since I hated being alone, especially now. When I was alone, I couldn’t stop the gruesome thoughts and memories. And… I didn’t feel safe. I knew I was safe here with Mike, but I didn’t feel safe. I couldn’t stop fearing that if I closed my eyes, someone would slash me open again. I was weak, weaker than a human child, and not having my strength nearly drove me into a panic.

When I had company, even if it was just this small human, I felt safer. I felt calmer. Even the burning pain in my veins didn’t feel so bad when Riley was near.

I wondered how long he would keep visiting me. He really was too kind to me. Having his company was more than enough, so I felt guilty for letting him become a Feeder. But that blood of his… Even the thought of it made me hungry…

And the way he looked at me when he was feeding me… It filled me with another kind of hunger. I knew what he was thinking when I drank his blood. He enjoyed the fact that his blood made me better. He enjoyed watching me do it. That alone turned my thoughts restless.

I opened my eyes and wasn’t surprised to see a set of green ones staring back at me. Riley smiled with a soft look on his face, slowly moving his hand up on my arm.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked.

I shook my head. “No…”

He moved closer to me and put his hand under my neck. I lifted my head, and he slid his arm under it, letting me use his shoulder as my pillow. I felt his other hand on the back of my head when he hugged me gently. As his warmth surrounded me, it was easier to close my eyes.

“The truth is…” he murmured in my ear. “I already feel connected with you. I felt like that the night I found you. I want to be here. I want to help you and give you everything I can. I want to see you strong and back in full health.”

I pulled back a little to see his face. His smile was so warm when he looked at me.

“I know we just met,” he continued quietly. “I know it may sound silly, but… I believe we were supposed to meet. That night when I found you, I had to slow down because of the rain only minutes before you ran in front of me. If I’d arrived even five seconds earlier, I would’ve missed you.”

“You really think it was fate?” I asked, and he nodded.

“I really do.”

I nodded slowly and rested my head back on his shoulder. “I think I know what you mean,” I murmured. “You saved my life. You’ve stayed with me. You’ve fed me… I’ve not been feeling that brave without my strength, but… it’s easier when you’re here with me. It’s comforting.”

He held me tighter, and my entire body relaxed in his arms.  

“I’ll protect you,” he said quietly.

I listened to his steady breathing and his heart for a moment, but my need to hear his voice pushed me to find something to say.

“You know… If vampires are pushed to their limits, we do become monsters,” I told him quietly. “That first night here… I was pushed past my limits. The pain was…”

I trailed off and shivered when I thought about the pain.

“I wished there was something I could’ve done to relieve that pain,” Riley whispered in a trembling voice. “I’ve never felt so helpless in my entire life.”

I smiled at his words and pulled back to see his face. “But you did so much already. You see, in that kind of pain, I should’ve lost control. The human in me should’ve retreated and left the body for my vampire side to take care of. There is not always coming back from that. Right now… I should be a mindless monster.”

“I don’t feel like I did much,” he murmured, his eyes tearing up.

“You did everything I needed you to do,” I whispered. “I, too, felt the connection with you that night. It kept me alive. It kept me sane. You gave me the strength I needed to stay in control and not lose my humanity.”

He sniffed, and smiled, then hugged me gently.

“Now tell me…” he whispered in my ear, still sniffing quietly. “After you and I went through a night like that together, how can you still expect me to just walk away and not help you in any way I possibly can? Would you be able to leave in my shoes?”

I buried my face against his chest. “No… I would not,” I whispered back.

“Exactly,” he said, brushing his hand through my hair.

I closed my eyes and took in his scent, enjoying his fingers playing in my hair. And before I knew it, I’d fallen into a peaceful sleep.