Once they all were back in the locker room, he watched the others leave for the showers and seated himself on the bench to drink something. At first, he didn’t realize Mael hadn’t left with the others. Until he suddenly spoke to him. “Why aren’t you showering with the others?”

From a man of fewer words, this was actually a question with surprisingly many. Ciaran turned around to meet another piercing gaze. How could someone focus that intensely on another human? “I don’t know if you haven’t connected the dots yet, but I’m gay, and they are not. That’s why I am waiting to shower after them.”

“They are forcing you to shower after them?”, Mael inquired further. 

“No, of course not. They are not a bunch of assholes.” Ciaran shook his had. “It’s not like that. When I came out at school and to everyone at the time, I decided myself to shower on my own. I didn’t want anyone of them to feel uncomfortable around me. They weren’t mean to me or something, but they weren’t used to having a gay team member. So, I wanted to take pressure out of the situation.” 

That was only half the truth. Once he came out, he still had an intensive crush on Logan. The thought of having some unwillingly body reactions if he caught a glimpse of a wet Logan under the shower had been reason enough to be careful. If they’d started to view him with different eyes, Ciaran wasn’t sure if he still could be a part of the team today. 

Mael stared at him for a long time, before he seated himself beside him on the bench.

“Aren’t you going to shower?” Ciaran asked with an eyebrow raised. 

“I’ll go with you.” Mael didn’t deliberate further on it. He simply said it with an implicitness that stunned Ciaran. Was he gay as well? Was that the reason he wanted to wait with him? Or - was this his way of telling him, he didn’t mind? Maybe he should have asked to clarify this, but after the situation with Pierce, Ciaran had little intention of causing another issue for himself. If he wasn’t gay and just wanted to be nice, he could be offended.

“Ok.” So, he simply replied with a single word and waited with Mael. Once the others had left the showers, Mael and Ciaran took their turn. Ciaran was solely focused on himself. He deliberately didn’t stare at Mael, so he wouldn’t send any wrong signals. As he turned to get his towel after he turned off the water, he realized Maels head moving abruptly. Had he stared at Ciaran? Or did he fear to give a wrong impression?

Ciaran shook his head. What difference did it make? He dried himself off and used the hair dryer in front of the mirrors. Many had called him beautiful before. Without wanting to brag, he considered himself to be pretty too. His blond hair came in different shades, the upper strands of his hair were of a brighter color thanks to the effects of the sun in summer. The lower shades seemed to blend into the higher brown nuances instead, and went along well with the warm hue of his eyes. In his opinion, they resembled the brown of an acacia tree.

His skin changed between a caramel like shade in the summer and a slightly brighter tune in the winter months. His eyelashes were a tad longer than most boys, his facials features more refined. Yet, he still had some sharp features that made him manly enough to give not too much room for any mobster. Not that he ever had problems with those, but there was a time he had worried his face might come too much after his mother. Luckily, puberty meant it well with him.

“See you on Monday, Mael. Have a nice weekend” He wasn’t in the mood to talk any further. After this long day, he only wanted to run right home. At least he had the next to days to calm himself before he had to face Pierce again.

“Sure see you.” Should he feel honored that he was actually sent of with a few words? Probably, but it surely would take some time to get adjusted to this new and strange guy. Ciaran left the school and checked the sides for any unwanted meetings. Thankfully, all the people he didn’t wish to see had left already. Pierce’s training was Tuesdays and Thursdays with special lessons on Saturdays, so there was no chance to run in him. 

He still hurried home to make sure, no other bad surprise got a chance to catch up to him. For once, he took the bus home instead of walking.