Riven apparently knew something had happened – probably knew what, too, if I had to guess – when I was at work the next day.  I kept noticing him out of the corner of my eye, looking like he wanted to say something, but chickening out when he saw my face.

My angry, angry face.  It hurt, right now, it hurt so much.  I didn’t think I could feel this much for someone in this short of time, but leaving him crying had wrenched my heart so hard it actually reminded me of when my aunt died.  It was better, though, safer.  I mean, if it hurt this much just to leave him, what would happen if I let him stay with me and then he got killed?  That would be a thousand, thousand times worse.

So I buried myself in more anger, more resentment, more guilt, and more self-loathing.  That’s what I did best.  It’s really the only thing I did well at all.

After work I started walking towards my aunt’s house, feeling a light sprinkling of rain as I went.  Not that big of a deal, rain was fine.  I kept my gaze on the ground, hoping not to accidentally antagonize anyone, and tried to avoid running into people despite part of me just wanting to scream and punch something.  Not hurt anyone, just punch…something?  A brick wall, maybe?  That could only hurt me, maybe that was safe.

I paused in the rain, confused about where I was – shouldn’t I be back at my aunt’s house by now?

Then my heart sank and I realized where I was standing.  I’d come back to the Woodson clinic, my feet on autopilot.  I groaned, cast one look at the house – and was startled when I saw what looked like a fair-haired angel from one of the windows.  His eyes caught mine, and I turned swiftly.  Damn it, he’d seen me.  He might think this was an attempt to apologize or –

I heard the door open behind me as I started to walk away.  “Judah!”  He called.  “Wait, please come back!”

He shouldn’t have risked opening the door into the street like that, not given his condition where someone could see him standing in the doorway with his wings out, but at least I didn’t have to worry about him following me.  He couldn’t leave the house, so as long as I kept my head down, didn’t listen to him, and didn’t look back and see his face – that face which would doubtless break all my resolve – then we’d both be okay.  Well, he’d be safe.  I’d be…crushed, but that was fine.

I walked as quickly as I could without running in the direction of my aunt’s house, taking a few shortcuts between some buildings to speed up the process.

I really wanted to get back to my aunt’s house ASAP.  She had a gym I’d never used, because I was afraid I’d break something, but right now all I wanted to do was get back there and punch the boxing bag as hard as I could.  Or maybe run on the treadmill.  Both.  Something.  Anything.

Then a sound caught my ear, a sound I couldn’t quite recognize, but something told me I needed to listen.  I stopped, held still, and strained my ears.

There were sounds of…people?  Yelling something?  Maybe someone was in danger – I couldn’t fight, I couldn’t risk that, but maybe I could help anyway.

I turned back the way I came and weaved through a few buildings before it opened up to a small stretch of shops by some houses and I took in the scene.

My heart stopped.

Damion was there, looking panicked, slowly trying to back away from the people who were all staring at him, his eyes frantically searching for an escape.  The humans had their phones out, recording what to them looked like – I don’t know, what did they think he was?  Wearing special effect makeup?  A really realistic costume?  I spotted another supernatural, a witch, but she looked bored and kept on walking, so this was up to me.

I couldn’t let him get hurt, not again.  He was freaking out, trapped in a crowd of people who might be simply curious but to him, were terrifying.

I shoved my way through the crowd and grabbed him around his shoulders, glaring at the people around.

“What are you doing here?”  I snapped under my breath.

“I needed to talk to you!”  He gasped, his hands clinging tightly to my shirt.

My heart sank so low I could almost feel it melt onto the pavement.

I’d done it again.  I’d put someone I’d cared about in danger because of my recklessness.

Well, this was my fault, I’d just have to fix it.

I dropped my backpack, pulled off my coat – it went about to my knees – and swung it around his shoulders, covering his wings as best I could.  I glared at the crowd again, and while they backed up as I started to pull him with me, staring and whispering, it was the phones with their stupid little cameras that bothered me the most.

I had to protect Damion, and this was all my fault, so I needed to fix this.

I cupped my hands over his eyes and ears and then let out a burst of magic, a bubble of translucent red which burst out from me and swept through all the people around us.

They all literally froze, temporarily paralyzed.

I grabbed Damion and dragged him away, ignoring his protests.

“What – what did you do?  Are they okay?”

“It’ll wear off in five minutes.  They won’t remember the last 15 minutes of their lives and their electronics will all be wiped of anything within the last 15 minutes, too.  Doesn’t fix anyone who saw you running on the way over here, but at least those people there won’t remember anything.”  I hurried him along, keeping my coat wrapped around him as I did.  It didn’t entirely hide his wings, the tips were trailing out the bottom, but most people probably wouldn’t notice in this rain.

“You can do that?”  Damion marveled.  “I mean, it seems potentially scary, but that’s really awesome!”

How was he like this only moments after being so terrified?  No matter, I could worry about that later, after he was safe.

Damion looked taken aback when I unlocked the gate of my aunt’s house and dragged him along inside, for once entering through the front door because it would take too long to bring him around the side.

“Well,” my aunt’s disinterested voice met us as we stood there, soaking wet on the cool marble floor, “what an…unusual guest.”

I almost glared at her before remembering that I needed her to not hate me so I could have somewhere to live.  “He won’t be here long,” I clarified.  Then I grabbed his shoulders again and hustled him upstairs to my room.

There wasn’t much in my room.  I didn’t bring anything with me other than a few clothes and one picture of my dad, and while here my aunt bought me some more clothes, but other than the picture on my dresser and my schoolwork, the room is completely blank, devoid of any personality.

It fit me.

I grabbed some sweatpants and a hoodie that I knew would be too large for him and then shoved him unceremoniously into my bathroom.  “Change out of your wet clothes,” I ordered.  Then, presuming he was doing that, I quickly changed into dry clothes of my own and then hunted for my cell phone.

It rang just as I picked it up, and I looked at it, surprised to see that the very person I was about to call had just called me instead.

“Judah,” Dr. Adair wasted no time, “is Damion with you?  He left the house and I followed his trail and came across some demon magic.”

“Yeah.”  I rubbed a towel through my damp hair.  “Sorry about that, had to mess with their electronics so they wouldn’t have recordings of him.  He’s at my aunt’s place.  Um, Catherine Sayers, you know her?”

I could hear him sigh with relief.  “Yes, I do.  Keep him there for a bit, would you?  I’ll pick him up but we have to deal with some stuff first.”

I heard the bathroom door open and Damion wandered out, looking like he was slightly swimming in my clothes.  I’d have thought it was cute if I wasn’t worried about the whole situation.

“I don’t know if anyone saw him between your clinic and the shops, and my magic won’t go back that far to erase their phones.”

“Yeah, that’s what we’re taking care of,” Dr. Adair explained.  “Don’t worry, we’re used to handling situations like this, it’s part of the council’s job.  But thank you for rescuing him and taking him somewhere safe.”

“Sure,” I responded a little bitterly.  After all, he was only in danger because of me in the first place – rescuing him seemed only fair.

I hung up and turned to answer the questioning look on Damion’s face.  “You’re staying here until the fairy doctor comes to get you.  He’s dealing with – or the council is – trying to make sure there’s nothing from anyone who may have seen you before the shops.  Don’t worry, you’ll be safe here – no one would dare break into my aunt’s house and if they did, well, demons have, uh, ways of protecting our houses.”

It was different ways than fairies did.  Fairies’ hearth magic was more defensive while demons’ was more offensive.  Our magic was designed to kill intruders, not simply force them off.

“However,” I crossed my arms as I looked down at him, trying to ignore the pang in my heart when I saw him wilt a little in response, “I still don’t understand what you were doing.  Following me?  Why?!  You know you can’t just run through town like that, and we already decided it was best not to see each other again!”

“You decided,” he corrected, a stubborn look coming across his face.  “I didn’t agree – I didn’t even get a chance to put in my two cents’ worth!  I don’t understand how us being attracted to each other means we can’t see each other ever again!  And I didn’t know if you’d ever come back or I’d ever see you again, so I had to follow.  I – I didn’t really think about it,” he admitted softly.  “I just ran after you because I knew I couldn’t just let you walk away like that.  I did that yesterday and regretted it so, so much but then you came back today and I thought maybe you wanted to talk?  And instead you just started to walk away again and I – I couldn’t risk you leaving.  Not again.”

I groaned and rubbed the back of my neck with my hand.  “I didn’t mean to come today, it was an accident.  I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.  And like I said, it’s best if we don’t have anything to do with each other.”

He crossed his arms, frowning at me, but he didn’t look at all intimidating in his damp hair and wearing my oversized clothes.  “But why?  Why is being with you dangerous?  Is it a demon thing?”

“No,” I growled, those images flashing through my head again, “it’s a me thing.  You just – you can’t be around me, okay?  I never meant to hang out as much as I did, I was just going to show you my textbooks a couple of times.  I wasn’t thinking.  And I am now, so I can’t put you at risk for my own stupidity.”

I ignored the way he’d flinched when I growled – demons could be scary even to other supernaturals, and especially to a pure-hearted thing like him.  Part of me was screaming to just wrap him in my arms and comfort him, but the other part realized what I’d have to do.

I needed to scare him just enough he wouldn’t want to ever see me again.

“You said you don’t like violence, you don’t like pain – but those are part of a demon’s life.  They’re part of my life.  If you stick around me, you’ll get caught in that, and you’ll end up being hurt worse than you are now.  You and I?  We weren’t meant to even be friends.  There’s no way there can be anything more, so do yourself a favor and forget you ever met me.  It’s better for everyone that way.”

He drew back, tears in his eyes, but while he was struggling with a response, I heard a distant knock.

Grabbing his arm as gently but firmly as I could, I tossed his wet clothes in a bag and then escorted him downstairs to where Dr. Adair was greeting my aunt.

Aunt Catherine looked even icier than normal as she politely welcomed him inside, but I got the very distinct impression she did not want him to actually come in.

“I’m only here for Damion,” he explained.  Then he saw us, and his eyes lit with relief.  “Damion, please don’t run off like that again!  If Judah hadn’t found you, it might have been quite a mess.”

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.  He wasn’t looking at me anymore, his shoulders were sagging, and I felt my heart start to break at the realization that I had crushed this beautiful soul.

Crushed, though – not broken.  As long as he wasn’t broken, he’d survive, and with me?  With me he’d only break.

I handed him and the bag of his wet clothes over to Dr. Adair, then stood with arms crossed as I watched them leave, Damion safely hidden inside the fairy’s car.  Once the car disappeared, I shut the door and glanced in my aunt’s direction.

“Sorry,” I said stiffly.  “It was – an emergency.”

“I’ll allow it this time, but be careful who you invite into the house.”  Her voice was colder than normal, but still polite.  “Adair Woodson is one of the most powerful fairies in the world.  It’s best not to be on his bad side, but it’s almost best not to get involved with him.  Especially since the pandemonium doesn’t even know you’re here.  If he mentions you to them – ”

“He won’t,” I interrupted hastily.  Well, I was pretty sure he wouldn’t.  He knew I didn’t want to get involved in this pandemonium.  “Anyway, sorry.”

I went back upstairs before she could finish whatever lecture she was going to say, probably something about how the pandemonium would be upset I’d been living here for about a year without informing them and having them welcome me into their circles.  After they got over their initial annoyance at the secrecy, they’d probably be happy to welcome a powerful demon.

Except I didn’t want to join, didn’t want to go down that path again, which meant I’d fight them to stay out if I could, and my aunt didn’t want me to kill pandemonium members.  Hence her agreement to keep my existence a secret.

Alone in my room, I sat down on my bed and put my head in my hands.  I’d put Damion in danger.  I hadn’t meant to, but that didn’t change the results.  What if he’d been captured by humans again and experimented on?  What if he’d gotten so scared he’d run in front of a truck and been killed?  I’d managed to stop anything from happening this time, just purely by luck, but this was exactly why I shouldn’t have anything to do with anyone.

Hanging out with me was a potential death sentence.