I’m dragged to a back room

They uncover my eyes and leave before I can look

Goosebumps on my arms as I look up to see Mena

Aniseh, what are you doing here?

Trying to get you back home, Aunty needs you.

What about your grandmother and sister?

Aunty needs you.

Aniseh!

I reach out to her and see all the things I could never be:

Bright constellations float in her eyes 

The freckled skin marking magic potential 

A rounded face suitors loved 

She’s never known anything but love

 Mena embodied 

love

And that made her worth more than twenty of me

I wasn’t even jealous as I pulled her close 

Wisps of hair tickling my nose

The whisper of fabric shifting the only noise in the room 

Mena, your brother is with Efehni now. 

You must go home and grieve with your mother. 

Snails moved faster from my hands as she pulls back to gaze in the void of my eyes

Many say they look like the dead 

With the exception of me

only the dead have no constellations in their eyes

From my eyes alone the clan said my grandmother should’ve thrown me out

The children had been told to never gaze into them lest I rob them of their stars

‘The child of Aluoch ruins everything in her wake.’

‘She was born a thief, stealing her mother’s life after all.’

‘Spirit killer.’

Mena as kind as she is 

has never stared directly into my eyes

But right now they felt glued to my black gaze as we stood nose to nose

The more seconds ticked by the more her grasp tightened

Our breaths mingled in the hush that had fallen

A silver lined muted gold stars

I- Oh, Aniseh!

She dove to my neck like a child 

The tears burned my neck and sealed my resolve

I pet her back

Humming 

Humming

Sighing 

And humming

I feel our time coming to close I know I must speak

When you get back home tell Auntie I said thank you for everything. 

Her chin digs into my shoulder as she nods 

Elder Ravenna will probably help you do the family rites, so don’t fret. 

She squeezes me tighter

And if it’ll make you feel better, wrap the hide me and A- my sister use to use. 

It’s been a comfort many a night.

Really?

Yes, it works wonders.

Mena snorts quietly and I continue to hold her 

until the moment is broken 

I wipe her face and step back as the door creaks open

Salmite illuminates the room as the elders walk in 

The situation has been resolved, come now.

The elders open up arms that Mena gladly rushes to

They embrace her with tenderness that renders me mute

Bitter if I weren’t numb to this 

They are ushering her out when she turns back to me 

Aniseh, come on.

I will never forget the way she looked at me expectantly

Golds stars full of expectation

Lit with slight attachment 

My hair curtains my eyes as I look down for a breath 

Mena listen to the elders. Go on.

Why are you standing there? We’re leaving.

My smile is made of cracked glass

I have to bite the inside of my cheek to remember to hold it in

Yes. You’re leaving. My place is here now.

I watch her turn to the elders

Their hands are now manacles

Yes, her place is here now. 

We must leave now young one.

Why?

Desperate times, call for desperate measures. 

The clan needs the heirs to step up. 

This is her chance.

The stars begin to wane, paling to beige

Anis-

Tell Aunty I said thank you for everything.

Thank you for the opportunity, Elders. 

I bow and block out the sounds of Mena’s cries renewing 

I continue as her feet drag against stone and clothes shuffle as they pull her away

As the door finally closes

My posture does not let up until I hear their footstep fade away 

Then 

Only then do I let the lick of warmth brush my heart

Did she want someone to confide in or was she actually concerned about me?

Is this the care I had desired to experience all those years ago?

Why did it have to be now?