Ian’s heartbeat throbbed loudly in his head, blocking out any other noise as he watched Eton cower beneath the sheets. He wanted to reach out and comfort Eton, but he knew that Eton would just jerk away. He was so close to his husband, but he also felt so far away. How did that make sense? How had that become his reality?

Eton cried beneath the sheets, shaking violently and muttering prayers beneath his trembling breath. He was a wreck. He was… broken. Gone.

Ian frowned as he listened to Eton cry. With each passing day, he felt further and further away from the man that he loved. He didn’t expect that to happen when Eton woke up from such a long coma. He thought that they would pick up where they left off. That certainly wasn’t the case.

Maybe this was Eton’s face and body, but the weeping, praying man in front of him seemed like a completely different person. The mannerisms were different. The speech was different. Everything was different, including their kiss.

He knew what it was like to kiss Eton. They had kissed more times than he could count, and each one was amazing in their own way. However, this last one was so intense and powerful. It felt like Eton was drawing in his very soul.

Ian remembered feeling a hint of that when he forcefully kissed Eton at the office, but he didn’t fully process it at the time. Now that he had felt it again and even harder, he realized that there was definitely still a connection between them. It felt different, but it was there.

Maybe things felt more intense because they hadn’t properly kissed each other since before the shooting. Years had passed since they were last intimate with each other. He probably should’ve expected fireworks but what he had just felt was more than fireworks. That kiss felt like their souls were colliding.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, but he didn’t think that Eton could hear him.

“I want to sleep,” Eton said after his whimpering subsided a little. He slightly pulled the sheets away, only exposing his head and his handcuffed hands.

Ian tried to meet Eton’s eyes, wanting to gaze deep into them. He wanted to see if the Eton he knew was actually there or if this was someone completely different. He knew that was crazy, but Eton claimed that he was a whole other person. Of course, it had to be an old school, homophobic priest.

“I’d never hurt you,” Ian told him, needing Eton to know that. He knew that he pushed and prodded, crossing boundaries and testing limits, but he did it for love. He had done a lot for his love for Eton, and he didn’t regret a single one of those things.

Tear streaks adorned Eton’s face as he turned his head to stare at Ian. His eyes were cold and empty.

“Are you sure about that? Do you see what you’re doing to me?” he asked, bitterness in his tone.

Ian swallowed hard, trying to wrap his brain around the concept of a different man being in front of him right now. He could imagine how stressful and shocking it would be to be forced to live someone else’s life. However, becoming a whole new person in a literal sense was impossible.

He didn’t want to call Eton crazy to his face right now since he was particularly upset, but Ian was certain that this had to be a side effect of the coma. Brains and comas were still being studied, and only so much was still known about them. Maybe this was one of those rare cases.

Instead of forcing Eton to act more like himself, maybe Ian could try a different method and treat Eton like the person he thought that he was. He wasn’t sure that it would actually work, but if it possibly brought back any memories, he would try it.

“You can be upset with me. When you remember everything, you’ll know why I did this,” Ian replied. It would be a long road ahead, but at least they were getting somewhere. He would try as many different tactics as he could.

Deep down, he knew that their love was still there. He felt it in their kiss, and Eton gave himself over to it briefly. His guilt just took over. Rather, the other person’s guilt took over him.

What did Ian even know about this other person, this Vincent guy? He knew that Vincent was some priest from years ago who hated gay people. He didn’t have a good grasp on technology. That was about it. Ian didn’t feel like getting to know a guy that hated him, but maybe that was his way to Eton.

“I’d like to be left alone,” Eton murmured quietly, tearing his eyes away from Ian.

Ian figured that nothing else would progress right now. He would give Eton some space, but he had a plan to figure out and put in place. He rose from the bed and picked up what he could from the breakfast that was scattered all over the floor. He took one last look at Eton, who had buried himself back under the sheets, before stepping out of the room.

Josh wandered down the hallway toward Ian, reporting for guard duty.

“He’s… distraught. Make sure he doesn’t take off. I have some things to do,” Ian told Josh. He had noticed that Eton was less tense around Josh, so he usually made Josh the head of Eton’s security detail.

Plus, he needed Eton to be comfortable with his security since the conflict with De Leon was continually ramping up. Ian had a bad feeling in his stomach. More and more agents were being outed as spies, and he wondered who else hadn’t jumped ship yet.

It disgusted him that people were betraying him right under his nose, especially for the man who shot his husband. Some people had no loyalty or dignity. Honestly, those spies were better off dead anyway. Ian couldn’t wait to get his hands on all of them. He just had to make sure that Eton was far away when he did.

Josh nodded as he positioned himself near Ian’s door.

“I’ll keep an eye on him, sir,” he replied.

Ian let out a slow breath and nodded, grateful that he could leave Eton in good hands. He needed some time to think, to figure out his next move. This Vincent guy seemed like the enemy, wearing the face of the man that Ian loved the most. It was horrifically confusing, but Ian had to play by his rules to possibly get to Eton.

That meant reeling back on the touching since that fired Vincent up. Eton would’ve welcomed it. Ian was dealing with two different people. He knew that his life had always been complicated, but he never thought that things would get this complex.

“If he wakes up soon, could you grab him a snack and some water? He didn’t eat much,” Ian asked. He wished that Eton hadn’t been so stubborn and turned food away for so long. He needed his strength.

“Of course, sir,” Josh said. “I’ll let him know that you sent it.”

“Oh, don’t bother,” Ian sighed. Honestly, he was afraid of Eton knowing that because he probably wouldn’t eat the food out of spite. It would be better if Eton thought that Josh grabbed him the food. “Just act like it’s from you.”

Josh eyed Ian for a moment before nodding his understanding.

“Is there anything else, sir?” Josh asked.

Ian paused, trying to think of anything else to do for Eton that he would actually accept. That limited him a lot, though. Eton was especially cold to him right now, which Ian expected to not change for at least a few days.

Usually, Eton couldn’t ever hold a grudge. He would act upset, stomping from room to room where Ian could just see him. However, he couldn’t stay silent and angry for long. He always went right back up to Ian, pouting about the lack of attention. Ian couldn’t deny him that.

Now, this Eton would starve himself and refuse to go to the bathroom just to not hug him. His determination to be spiteful was ridiculous, and Ian hated to be on the receiving end of that. He wanted to catch a break.

"No, that will be all for now."