9:00 PM
It's 9, I walk over to my window and open it. I get my first leg through the window and then my door opens, it's my brother, shit. He stops talking then sneers and says
"Oooh somebody's sneaking out. What's in the bag?"
I get defensive and want to jump out of the window and run but then my brother says
"I'll help" I pause and stare at him
"You will?!" and he says
"Yea I mean do you know how many times I had snuck out when I was your age?" I stare at him, I'm going to be honest that's not surprising. We make a plan, I sneak out when there are zero lamplights on and then my brother will say that I was really tired and in bed, but if they don't believe that my brother put a whole ton of clothes to resemble my body but if that doesn't work...I hear him snickering like he always does so I ask
"what's so funny?" he said
"Oh, it's nothing" and then sneered. I'm not sure if that's his actual smile or a sneer but I brushed it off and followed through with the plan. The plan was successful! Or at least I think so
I head out and wait for Leo at the beginning of the neighborhood and I see his car. I give the signal and he unlocks the car and says
"You know the concert is going to finish late. I don't trust myself to drive you home late at night while I'm tired, so I uh I got us a hotel room to spend the night in if you don't mind of course."
" Yeah, that's fine." He drove us to the stadium. We get inside and I change into the clothes that I bought and we get some soda and get to our seats for the concert. I can see how excited he is. This is awesome. We jump around and laugh during the concert.
2:00 AM
The concert is over, and Leo and I are exhausted. We get in the car and drive to the hotel. We check-in. Turns out we have to share a bed. We're walking to our room and I notice something is off with Leo, I held his hand for reassurance. He didn't say anything, he just kept walking. We get to our hotel room and he puts his arm against the wall right next to me and caresses my cheek then kisses me. He carries me onto the bed and then pins me down.
"Are you okay with this?" I nod. He takes off his shirt and puts his hand up my shirt. Then he takes off my shirt and he starts making out with me again.
"I love you" he whispers in my ear
"I love you more than you could ever think." I cover my face in embarrassment but he gently moves my arm away.
"Do you like this?" I kiss him in response. His black hair is very soft and it smells good. Just feeling his body up against mine, my face in his hair, my hands wrapped around his neck gently, makes me want him more, my desire for him is showing. I can feel his tongue. He pushes away to breathe, the pleasure I'm feeling right now is worth going out of my boundaries and giving in. All I can focus on is Leo. I feel like some things off, I just don't think I'm gay I mean I love only men, I just feel something off, I've been getting this feeling whenever I'm thinking about who I am. I don't know, I'll think about it later.
June 10, 6:00 AM
I got up and thought last night was awesome but I have to go before sunrise. I wrote a note to Leo explaining why I had to go. Thankfully I had packed some extra parent-friendly clothes and I got changed and headed out of the hotel and got onto a bus that came at 6:15 AM I got to the bus stop close to my neighborhood and went home.
6:30 AM
Once I got home I snuck through my window and got changed into my pajamas and went downstairs to get something to eat, but once I got down there Ma, who is crying, my father and my brother were standing there and my dad says "You fucking fag, how could you lie to us? We trusted you!"
I'm confused, how could they know I sneaked out with Leo, was it, my brother?
"Huh?" My father glares at me
"Don't act stupid! You went out to a concert with Leo then slept with him, didn't you." my mother butts in
"he's just a kid! Give him a break!" I realize my brother ratted me out, I'm so fucking pissed so I scream
"YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT? YEA I LIKE LEO, SO WHAT IF I LIKE MEN? HOW DOES THAT AFFECT YOU? HOW IS THIS ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS, AND DON'T EVER USE SLURS AROUND ME YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE."
As soon as I realized what I said, I cover my mouth and run to my room. Shit, shit, I am so fucking screwed. Before I do anything I block my door with my dresser because if I didn't do this who knows what kind of beatings I would get. I think for a moment and I realize that I can't stay at home. Anything could happen to me. I'm going to get out of here, but who would I stay with? Grandma? No, she wouldn't support the idea, uh, but before anything happens my mom knocks on my door and says pack everything up, and meet Leo where I always meet him and fast. What the fuck? I pause and get close to my door so that my mom can hear me if she's still there and I say in the kindest tone possible
"What? I'm sorry mom but what the actual fuck?" she sighs
"Hun, I love you, I know what's been going on, in general, between you and Leo, don't ask me why or how ill tell you later, I've been planning if this were to ever happen, I know it's stupid and dumb and I should have done something about it before to prevent this from happening, but please do this for me, I have this all figured out, just trust me please."
I pack a bag with my savings and some clothes, and I get my phone, I'm ready. I sneak out of the window and start running. Leo is waiting for me at the same spot.
7:30 AM
I'm sobbing. He sees me and unlocks the car and starts talking about how our mother's planned this and how my mom and I are going to be staying at their house He looks at me with an expression of worry. I start bawling my eyes out, Leo is so kind and caring that I don't know what I would do without him. I started sobbing even more. I try to stop but it just keeps on coming. He starts leaning towards me and then hugs and says it's okay. He drives to his place. Once he pulled up to his place. He brings me inside and introduces his mothers to me, they sit us down and ask us
"Are you guys dating? I know it's an inappropriate time to ask but..."
I hold back saying anything that could potentially hurt 's feelings so I stay silent and wait for Leo's answer then he says
"I don't know, but I love Kel"
"Well" one of the moms sighs
"It's kinda obvious we support you two so don't look so tense, Kel" I sigh in relief knowing that I am welcomed here. I text my Ma telling her that I got there safely, and she texts back saying that she is glad that it worked out but, what happened today was the last straw, she's getting a divorce. I texted her love her, but where would she stay? I start worrying about everything that could happen, Ma texts me back I love you too and explains how she will also be staying here. Is this a dream? Nightmare? Ugh, my mind can't handle it. What the actual fuck? I'm overwhelmed and I just want to see Ma.
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