I was so captivated in the moment that it took a few seconds for the blush to catch up to me. Gently pulling my hand away, I tried to focus on anything that would quiet my suddenly restless mind, and distract my thoughts from how warm his mouth had been against my skin.
It was easy for us to lose time in idle conversation, until I was yawning and we both admitted it was time to head home- though neither of us was eager to leave our quiet corner of the beach. Ethan guided the way back to his bike, its headlight a shining beacon in the dark when he turned the key. It was less terrifying sitting behind him now, pressed up against his back with my eyes closed and my heart humming in tandem with the engine.
The street was quiet as he parked his bike in front of my mother’s shop. Ethan helped me unbuckle my helmet when my fingers fumbled. I swallowed hard when the brush of his knuckles against my neck had my stomach twisting in knots of nervous anticipation. “Thanks… for tonight. I had a great time,” I managed as I hovered, reluctant to go inside and end the date I hadn’t expected to enjoy so thoroughly.
Ethan's eyes were searching as he dismounted the bike, stepping so close to me I could see the flecks of amber and emerald in his irises. He sucked in a breath, his hand cupping my jaw as he tilted my chin up. Slowly, as if waiting for me to stop him, Ethan's fingers tugged at my hair tenderly. He pulled me forward, his lips taking mine in a soft, deep kiss.
I leaned into him like I’d been wanting to since I saw the stars reflected in his eyes. My fingers curled in the front of his shirt, my eyes closed as I soaked in the moment. I kissed him back eagerly, feeling his arms tighten around me as he sighed out a content moan. I pulled away reluctantly, a soft sigh filling the scant air between us. “Ethan…” I breathed his name, searching his face for a reason to keep him there a few minutes longer.
There were too many, and it had an easy smile on my face as I made myself step back. I wasn’t ready to let go completely, my hands catching his. “You really are a romantic… and it’s working,” I said, linking my fingers with his and squeezing lightly. He’d asked me in the forest if I could like him back, and I knew if he asked that question again, it wouldn’t be a ‘maybe’ this time.
Instead, Ethan swallowed, pressing his forehead to mine as he whispered. "I should probably… let you go inside." He smirked, stealing another quick kiss. "Heaven knows that I don't want to." His eyes were serious as he confessed, "I've fallen for you, Lyndon Weir. Just know that no matter what, I'm on your side."
My breath was caught in my throat, my hands squeezing his tightly as I struggled to process his words. When they filtered through my surprise, I salvaged my smile. My heart was loud in my ears as I reminded myself he wasn’t pressuring me; he was being honest, and he deserved the same from me. “I… I like you a lot, Ethan.” I pulled my hands back slowly, taking a couple of steps back to put some distance between us; to convince myself I had to say goodnight. “It’s late- if you don’t head back, you’ll be late for class again.”
He gave a small smirk, nodding as he mounted his bike. "Yeah okay. You keep that helmet though. I'll be wanting to make good use of it." He winked. "Go on inside now. I'll wait to make sure you make it in okay. Don't want you locked out or anything."
I laughed softly, gripping the helmet tightly with one hand. “Thanks. Goodnight, Ethan.” Turning away was harder than I thought it would be, and I was dragging my feet to the welcoming red door. I tried to be quiet so I wouldn’t wake up my mother as I unlocked and opened the door. Pausing at the threshold, I waved to Ethan; it was hard to turn away, but I knew he wouldn’t leave until he saw I was safely inside.
I closed the door softly, and promptly collapsed back against it. My hand pressed to my mouth temporarily, as if seeking Ethan’s warmth again as I replayed the moment in my mind. I might have spent the night there if a glimpse of movement out of the corner of my eye hadn’t sent my heart leaping into my throat. I turned expecting the worst, only to find my mother frozen in place with a sheepish expression.
“He-ey Lyn,” she said, “Have a good time?”
It took me a second of silent staring before I realized what I was seeing; my face turned red, and I hurried to her side. “Are you kidding me?” I hissed, dragging her away from the window where she must have been watching me and Ethan. How much had she seen? Swallowing past the tight lump in my throat, I pushed her in the direction of the beaded curtain which led to the back of the shop- and the staircase to the second floor, which we’d turned into a modest flat. “I’m not a teenager, mom! I hardly have a curfew, and I certainly don’t need you spying on me!”
“I wasn’t ‘spying’,” she protested.
“Oh? What would you call it then?”
“Living vicariously through my son?”
I scoffed at her suggestion, leaving her on the landing of the stairs as I pushed past her. “Go out and get yourself a date instead.”
She hummed a noncommittal sound as she headed toward her room, pausing in the doorway to look at me with a soft expression. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you, Lyn. I just… want to make sure you’re going to be okay.”
My chest was tight as I understood her concern; she’d watched me struggle as the entire town turned against me, so I didn’t blame her for being a little overprotective. “Ethan won’t hurt me, mum,” I said softly, surprised at the amount of confidence I had in that. My mother smiled at me, wishing me a good night before shutting the door behind her.
Left with the silence of our dark flat, I shut myself in my room and got ready for bed. It felt like I was on autopilot, my mind left behind in the moment where Ethan’s warmth had consumed me. Even when I fell into bed, my eyes closed to the image of his face so close to mine as my heart thrummed in my chest.
Ethan had given me a confidence in myself I’d never imagined possible as he silently supported my research in the forest, always at my side when I needed him. Now, as I tried to chase the lingering feeling of his mouth against mine out of my mind so I could sleep, I wondered how much more I could discover with him. Given enough time, I might even give a name to the fragile feeling blossoming in my heart.
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