- Eros -

Destiny has been updating her social media frequently for a few days. Since the night I paired her. Pictures of her and her buff Partner/Personal Trainer, Jordan Hunter, have flooded her account.

Some fans calling her a slut, some cheering on for her. 

There was something in every picture though, something I couldn't detect from her. It was missing. 

I just couldn't put my finger on what was absent from those pictures.

To say I felt like utter shit was an understatement. I felt totally nothing. My heart was completely numb and void of all sorts of emotions.

I didn't even have it in me anymore.

I did feel a little angry at the harsh comments directed at Destiny, a lot angry actually. But she was handling everything well on her own. That was how she was.

Payne hasn't spoken to me, only has been picking up the pieces for every day that I've tried to kill myself.

I survived the fall off my roof obviously. That was two days ago now. He wasn't very happy to find my body splayed out on the ground with my neck broken. 

I drove into a tree yesterday, at 240km/hour. He wasn't very happy about finding my bloodied body thrown halfway out the windscreen with a broken skull.

He seemed sadder for my car than for me. I remember him saying something along the lines of, "If you wanted to die at least leave your car out of this."

He probably already ordered a new set of the cars that I've damaged.

I stared at the needle on my table, it was quite huge. It was filled with concentrated strychnine solution.

I heard a small dose of this thing could kill an adult human in a matter of hours.

Maybe it will take me out of my pathetic life for a while.

Let's see.

Attacks the central nervous system, check.

Violent contraction of muscles, check.

Paralysis of the respiratory pathways, check.

Sounds like a painful way to go. Good.

The knock on my office door brought me back to reality for a moment. Payne never knocks.

"Come in," I called out.

The door creaked open and she stepped in. Daintily, softly, gently, like a Princess.

I stood up, my voice threatening to shake, "Destiny."

She smiled at me, whatever that was missing in her pictures was present here though. 

She wore a white, off-the-shoulder top, with a pair of black and white striped shorts. Modern, classy and beautiful. More so with the delicate pair of heels.

Her aura was bright and lively, something I loved from her.

"I was passing by and wanted to come check in on you," she strode in and eyed the syringe on my table.

I opened the top drawer and slid the needle in before she could inquire. I gestured towards the sofa seats, "Have a seat."

I went to the pantry, "Would you like a drink?"

"A hot chocolate will be nice," she called out.

My heart was out of rhythm for a moment, she remembers the drink I made for her.

"The weather is a little hot for that," I replied.

Small giggle from her, "I would still like that please."

For once in three days, I felt a grin slide across my lips.

I stirred her drink, regretting the fact that I didn't dress better for her. I wasn't in the mood to choose anything and only pulled on a white dress shirt with a pair of black pants.

I didn't even brush my hair since the last time I saw her.

I took the cup of chocolate over to her and placed it on the coffee table. I sat on the other end of the sofa like last time and she took a sip of the drink I made.

She closed her eyes, the steam warming up her already pink cheeks. 

Watching her was some sort of therapy for me, taking me out of my misery and relishing in her presence. I could smell her scent of berries now that she was a distance from me.

She placed her mug down and looked up at me, "How have you been?"

I sighed, happy that she was here with me, "I'm better now."

She smiled and shook her head, "I've been hearing things about you."

Oh?

Her smile slipped away and her eyes were grave, "Why are you hurting yourself?"

My eyes widened slightly, how did she know?

She scooted closer to me, as if sensing the vulnerability within me, and redid the buttons on my shirt for me.

I didn't even realise that I'd buttoned them wrongly.

I loved the way her fingers gently glided down my shirt, her attentiveness and care.

"Do you like to feel hurt?" She pressed.

Her eyes locked with mine and I found myself nodding, "The physical pain takes the emotional one away."

She held my face in one of her hands, "There are better ways to deal with it."

I wanted to laugh at that, but a scoff escaped my lips, "Nothing can heal my heart Destiny. My body may heal over and over again, but my heart is a broken vessel."

"I'm not telling you to heal immediately Eros, but I'm telling you to try."

"Try what? Try living? What's there to live for? I have more than enough money, I've travelled the world at least a hundred times, maybe a thousand even. I've eaten the weirdest shit this world has, from fried grasshoppers to the best fried chicken. All the wines I've tasted. Every single race of woman I've fucked, what else is there?!" I finished my speech and saw something flash in her eyes.

"If your life is so materialistic as you say it to be, it is no wonder you want to die," she spit at me and my heart ached at that.

Was that how I was to her? 

She closed her eyes and her aura seemed to calm down very slightly, she glanced back at me and put her arms out.

I gave her a look, wondering what she wanted.

"Hug me," she motioned for me and I gulped.

I loved holding her, I was only afraid I wouldn't be able to let her go.

Still, I wasn't going to give up this chance. Worse to worse I still had my poison in my drawer.

I reached out for her and her arms wrapped around me, enveloping me in her serenity. I snuggled into her embrace and held her close, a sadness filling me. This wonderful woman, she will never be mine.

"I keep forgetting that you've been lonely for so long. It's not right of me to reprimand you like this when I don't understand what you're going through," she whispered and I squeezed her tighter.

"You're pitying me," I stated.

She shook her head and patted my head like a baby, "No I don't. You're a rich bachelor with eternal life, there's no need to pity you."

I didn't know if that was supposed to sound sarcastic but it did feel that way.

"So you just came here to check on me?" I mumbled.

She pulled away, "You must be thinking how you're so very charismatic huh Eros? That I don't normally feel attached to anyone but I do somehow feel very drawn towards you?"

I smirked but she placed her finger on my lips, "Before you start getting cocky about it and saying how I can't resist you, it's not that. I remember that I still haven't told you about Trevor. That was part of our agreement, do you recall?"

Oh?

I nodded and settled in, wanting to hear exactly what happened that drew her here to me that night.

She gulped and I realised how afraid she was. 

She cleared her throat, "That night, after seeing you at the concert, that guy, Trevor was crazily in love with me. I supposed and figured that he was probably a really big fan. I never really felt anything for him though, just found it weird that a total stranger like him would love me so deeply.

I guess the breaker was that I wasn't reciprocating the love back to him and he went bonkers.

He seemed to change overnight, from being extremely loving and caring to totally bitter and abusive. I thought it was a phase and he would get over it. When I said things wouldn't work out-" She sighed really loudly and closed her eyes for a moment before looking at me.

"He flared up at me, got angry, he slapped and pinched me. I locked him out of my room that night. I really hoped things would be okay and he would apologise for what he did. I went to work, I didn't see him during the day. My manager got worried from seeing all the bruises on me.

I told her I would be fine and she told me to call her if anything were to happen. I went back home, found Trevor drinking lots of beer in the living room, when he saw me, he didn't even acknowledge me. I guessed that he was done with this thing that we were having and I told him to get out when he was done drinking.

I went to shower and when I came out of the bathroom, he was in my room. A cigarette in hand, smoking in my room. I got really angry, I hated the smell of cigarettes. I yelled at him and told him to get the hell out of there.

Then his calmness seemed to snap and he became really violent. He grabbed my hair and pulled me to bed, he slapped and punched me. Then I bolted out of there when he was about to press the cigarette butt on me. Then I ran, I didn't know where or how. I ended up here."

My body felt hot with anger, I was glad I kicked him hard that night. He deserved it.

I opened my arms this time and she gave me a curious look before smiling and embracing me.

I sighed and pulled her close, patting her back, "I'm glad you came here, at least I got to kick his ass."

She giggled quietly and pulled away, "Speaking about that, you're really violent."

I shrugged, "Not always, I have to protect myself too you know."

She gave me a look which made my skin crawl, "I don't think anyone would hurt you more than you do to yourself."

My mouth fell open, oh no.