"Humans aren't chewing toys," Hermes said to his favorite creature, noting the human in one of its jaws.

"I was just looking for someone to play with, but these humans are so fragile," Cerberus said in a mix of growls and snaps of the jaw that anyone else would've misconstrued as meaningless.

His answer was followed by other heads snapping at each other.

That had been happening more frequently. Hermes blamed himself for not addressing the issue on time. Cerberus was anxious. It was Hermes' job as his keeper to help him.

He had failed his charge, which he regretted more than he did the loss of life that Cerberus' escape created. After all, humans were bound to die one way or the other. They were all the same, dispensable.

However, Cerberus was one of a kind. Hermes knew that his exhaustion wasn't a good enough excuse for him to fail his favorite being.

"They are, and that's why we don't play with humans," Hermes said instead of berating himself for his mistakes.

"Let's go home. We'll find someone stronger for you to play with," Hermes said.

"No one wants to play with me," Cerberus said, lowering his head and dropping the human carcass on the ground.

It blended nicely with the creepy decorations that humans put up for Halloween. Hermes thought humans deserved to be eaten by his pet when they showed blatant disrespect for what the holiday truly stood for.

"Don't be sad. Maybe the Sphinx will want to play with you." Hermes said.

"No! Not her! She always talks in riddles and never wants to play catch with me." Cerberus said unhappily. Still, he followed Hermes as he led him towards the door to the Underworld.

"How about the hell-hounds? I am sure they are up for a game, and you can play with them as roughly as you want." Hermes said.

"Are you sure they'll want to play with me?" Cerberus asked.

"Why wouldn't they? You're awesome. They will love playing with you." Hermes said encouragingly.

"I heard some of the others say that I am weird," Cerberus said, looking at his paws as they came to stand in front of the entrance to the Underworld.

"They are just jealous because you are the most unique creature in the Underworld," Hermes said.

"You really think so?" Cerberus asked, wagging his enormous tail.

"I know so. Now let's go and find those hell-hounds. I am sure they're up for a game of chase. I will get you a few honey cakes, and I hear that there are two souls on the west field trying to escape. You can snack on those as well." Hermes said.

"Thanks, Hermes, you're the best," Cerberus said as they went through the gate.

"Oh, and Hermes, I am sorry I escaped," Cerberus said.

"That's okay, big guy. The important thing is that you are home now." Hermes said.