Ben was pressing his hands on his shoulders and pinning him beneath his body, as he was afraid he might try to escape anytime. He was pushing into him with fast, irregular thrusts and Revie was struggling to breath, his cheeks pressed against the seat. He glimpsed the clouded windows, the air warmed up by their bodies’ heat. When the man finally came, he collapsed on his back with a low moan of pleasure, pressing him done even more. He didn’t come, but he was feeling better, mentally. A false feeling of euphoria was shaking his chest, his head finally emptied of all those nagging thoughts.
Feeling the man's breath against his own hair, and his cock slipping out of him, brought him back to reality. While they were getting dressed again, Ben continued to stare at him.
"That was amazing. You have such a soft skin ... and long hair like a prince."
Revie looked out the window. The only thing he could think about was the wet, uncomfortable pain between his legs.
“I hope you enjoyed it, too", he added, then reaching out a hand to caress his thigh, attempting a gesture of comfort. "And that I didn't hurt you. Maybe I was a little rough on you. I couldn't help myself, I couldn’t imagine it was so...tight. It was really amazing."
"I liked it," he lied and moved the man’s hand away from his leg. He didn't really care if he enjoyed it or not. He have had his free half an hour of sex with a young guy, probably a sexual fantasy on which his porn researches were based on. Revie would have bet he was married, declared straight, maybe even a father; but he didn't have the courage to ask, because most of the time he wasn't wrong.
"I don't really get why you're here," the man said, now in a colder tone, adjusting the coat over his shoulders. "You're a pretty guy. Why are you looking for sex online? Sooner or later, someone will hurt you."
Revie smiled, nodding. It wasn’t the first time he had been asked such a question. Him, so pretty and young, sleeping with strangers, often older than him and not even very attractive, risking dangerous situations. Probably the Revie of the past would have asked him the same question: what are you doing here?
Or his friends, or his family, if they found out how he spent his evenings. No one would have understood him.
"I can defend myself", he said simply, running his hands through his wavy hair. She owed him no explanation.
He drove the man back to the place where they had me, without addressing any words to him during the short drive. He pulled over to the side of the road, in the same spot where he had been waiting for him.
"Any chance of seeing you again?" Ben asked, after he stepped out onto the sidewalk, the door still half open.
"Good night" Revie whispered, without looking away from his own reflection in the car mirror. He listened to the door close and the footsteps getting far, with a knot in his throat. He expected at any moment the man might have turned around and forced him to stay in his company for another hour. It took him a few seconds to start the car again, trying to ignore the images in his head, in which he was again pinned naked against the seat, moaning and gasping uncontrollably for a stranger. He left with the idea of going back home, but found himself parking next to the pub where Bastian worked. He stood still in the darkness inside the vehicle, his back leaning against the seat, staring at the red sign on the front, "Red Hat pub." He felt trapped in a body full of wounds and discomfort. He wondered if Bastian was on shift that night.
He exchanged a gaze with himself in the mirror. Then, in an instant, the impassive expression on his face was ruined by a sudden, wet, sobbing cry that could have reminded someone of a child's. He plugged his mouth with his hand in attempt to be more silent, fearing someone might have heard him in the silence of the night. He leaned over the steering wheel, tears slipping down his fingers, neck and pants, leaving small patches on the fabric.
"Stop it!" he yelled to himself, and hit himself on the forehead twice, with the palm of his hand.
Sooner or later, someone will hurt you, the man said to him. The only thing Revie could think in response was that he would have deserved it.