Important:
In this chapter, there is a very brief mention of being depressed though it is not said directly. The things mentioned are not at all meant to describe everyone who has experienced this. The thoughts or things mentioned are only from my point of view or thoughts which have then been edited to fit the characters and the situation. This is a fiction story and though the setting and world are fictional, the issues are very much real, please know that it is not my intention to disregard the importance or impact that these may have on a person. That being said, if you feel as if that is what is coming across or feel as though I did not describe it in the best possible way, please feel free to contact me.
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I bolt upright, suddenly wide awake as the early morning sun streams in through the curtains. I look at the clock on my nightstand, the numbers just changing over to 7:24. I look at my wrist, and the Counter illuminates 457 days, 2 hours, and 41 minutes. My mind starts racing again. I stay sitting there for at least 10 minutes, trying to grasp what I just witnessed. Now I know this isn't my subconscious, stress, or whatever other excuses I came up with; this is on its own level of weird. I decide to push it to the back of my mind for now and get ready for the day as best as I can without completely getting engulfed in my thoughts. By the time I'm ready to go, 7:50 comes, and Andrew, Ruby, and I walk to school.
My body goes on autopilot again, and my brain decides to drift back to the dream. The eyes that appeared at the end held so much; I could almost feel the emotions that were there instead of just being able to read them. I have been able to read someone's emotions for so long, but I have never been able to read emotions in a dream, so why this one? Why could I feel the same thing? And those eyes. I have never seen someone in Valmont with that eye color. They were such a dark yellow that they could be gold; in fact, they were gold. Sometimes people can have light hazel eyes that might look like gold in the right light, but they were very clearly gold.
Also, the conversation that took place was one that I was not meant to hear, even if I knew who these people were or what they were talking about. They were meeting somewhere secluded and empty based on the echo, but what were they meeting about? The kid didn't seem scared when talking, but when the other two, Frank and whoever the boss was, left, he sounded like he had been holding his breath. What was with the last thing he said? Why of every word he could have used, did he say, 'my lily'? I get that it's a common name, but the chances of being there, dream or not, and my name being Lily, are low to near impossible. It can be used as a term of endearment, but I haven't heard someone use it. The watch that appeared was exactly like the one in the building in the last dream and that sun, I know I have seen it before, but I don't know where.
The bell rings, and I realize that I had gotten to school, got the things for history, and gone through history all out of muscle memory. I try to clear my mind and focus on the rest of my morning classes, with little to no success, and finally make it to lunch. I'm already in the cafeteria, waiting for Mia and Skylar to finish a test in their classes when my mind drifts back to the sun. I know there is a meaning behind that specific sun, but I can't seem to dig it out. I take out my notebook and a pencil, push my tray away, and start to draw it as best as I can from memory, hoping I could spark something. I finish drawing one and move on to another, drawing it over and over again. I am so focused on drawing this sun that I don't even realize Mia and Skylar have sat down. I hear them talking, but I can't quite understand what they are saying. I am completely engulfed in the drawing, oblivious to everything and everyone until Skylar speaks, breaking me out of the spell.
"I knew that looked familiar. That sun can sometimes represent the God Apollo."
My head shoots up, and I stare at him.
"What did you just say?"
"The sun," he points to my drawing and starts to dig out a random book from his bag, "to some, it's just a sun, but many used to associate it with the Greek God, Apollo"
He flips the book open and searches through a few pages before turning the book to me. Right there on the page was the same sun I had drawn 17 times in my notebook.
I stare at it in disbelief looking between the book and my drawing.
"Why do you have this book?" I ask, still nose-deep in its pages.
"I was out a few history credits that I needed to graduate, so I joined world history halfway through the class. The teacher and my counselor agreed that I could make up the points I missed from the first part of the class with a 15-page essay about one of the big parts of Greek and Roman civilization, so I decided to write about the Gods and Goddesses they worshiped. This book talks about the differences between the Gods each civilization worshiped. Though the domains and areas they ruled were the mostly same between them, the names were different. Apollo was one of the few deities where the Romans kept the same name. However, to the Greeks, he was mostly known as the God of light while to the Romans, they mainly saw him as the God of healing and prophecy," he went on.
Though I'm listening to him, my eyes are glued to the picture. Of all things to show up in a dream, why this? I look at my Counter again, reading 456 days 20 hours, and 45 minutes. I don't know why, but I have felt a pull coming from the Counter these past few days. I don't know how to explain it other than it's like it wants me to just sit and watch it tick down. The bell rings, signaling the end of lunch, and as we get up to head back to class, I ask Skylar if I can hold on to the book until the end of the day, to which he agrees. Luckily, the next period turns into a study hall, so I can sit and look through it without worry. I flip through the book until I reach the beginning of the section about Apollo, the first passage I read talking about what Skylar said earlier and the depiction between Romans and Greeks:
"...The ancient Greek pantheon was later adopted by the Romans, who worshiped the same deities, but often with different nomenclatures. All the main Greek divinities, the Olympian gods and goddesses, were revered by the Romans. Apollo is one of the most complex figures in the whole of the Olympian pantheon. Venerated earlier as the God of music, arts, beauty, healing, and poetry, he later came to be associated with brightness and light, and hence with the Sun. However, as we delve deeper into Apollo's mythology, we come to realize that his new assignment as the Sun God does not minimize or in any way adversely affect his earlier functions. That is to say that even though he is elevated to the status of the Sun God, he remains the lord of beauty, arts, and healing..."
I skim through the next couple of pages until I hit the picture of the sun again, this time noticing the footnote associated with it, talking about the areas in his control and his gifts:
"...The God of the sun, light, truth, music, poetry, healing, and more. However, his two most well-known epithets are being the God of the sun and light. He is always depicted as being beardless, youthful, and physically handsome. He has a twin sister named Artemis, the Goddess of the hunt. As the God of the sun, he represented the light time of the day in contrast to his sister, who represented the nighttime...Since Apollo was also musical and poetic, he was considered the God of Music and Poetry. These two gifts work together because poems are often set to music...Another role he had was to bring the sun to the earth each day. He is considered the God of the Sun and the light for this reason...One of his many gifts is that he had the gift of prophecy. He could see the future, but it wasn't always a guarantee..."
I continue to skim through the book and take in page after page, writing down random bits of information for no reason. I am so intrigued about Apollo and not just because of the sun in my dream. The stories of him, the gifts, and every bit of information I read feels like it's coming directly from him while at the same time talking about someone completely different. It also feels like it relates to me as well, as weird as that is to say. For example, when I read about his prophetic gift and what was included, it feels like it's describing my gift in a way. Class ends, and I look at the random pieces of information I have scrawled throughout my notebook.
I am looking way too much into this dream, but at the same time, there is no way my subconscious came up with this on its own, so I only really have two options. Either accept it and find out what I can or admit that I'm finally losing my mind to stress. The latter is more plausible but something in me wants to follow the former.
I continue through the rest of the day as best as possible, my mind staying occupied with all of the stories I read. At the end of the day, I meet up with Mia and Skylar at the front doors, giving him his book back.
"Thanks for letting me borrow that. I think I got the information I need," I say, handing it back to him.
"Sure, no problem," he says, shoving it back into his bag, "so, are we still going to the library today?"
"You guys go ahead. I'm going to go home; I'm not feeling the best today."
"Ok babes, see you later. Hope you feel better and see you tomorrow " Mia says, giving me a peck on the cheek and hugging me as they head in the opposite direction.
Waving goodbye, I make my way back toward home; I look back at the school as teenagers pour out of the doors, going toward the buses or the bike racks. I see the Wall wrapping around the city just behind the school and notice it starting to crack. The city has been around for a little over a century and a half, so it would make sense that it's not in perfect condition in such a hidden place. Near the business district, the Elites, the Main Gate, and the elementary school, the Wall looks new and is cleaned and repaired if needed every 5 to 10 years. Areas like near the high school are rarely seen or noticed, so long as it's standing, that's all that matters.
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