Read Letter To Dear Duke :: Chapter 1 : Listen, God!!!

Today, on the first day of the New Year ball which is always held for three days from 31 Dec to 2 January, is the birthday of the daughter of my first love.

From the rumours that I hear sometimes, the child of my loved one is someone who has been known for her mischief for several years.

Even so, I still want to meet that cute girl because I've never met her. For 10 years since she was born and 10 years her father was a single father, I never had the chance to meet his daughter at the ball. Because the child's age has not yet reached 10 years, which is the age of coming of age for everyone in this world, I didn't get a chance to meet her.

'what does she look like? is she the same as her father? or does she follow after her mother? what about her real character? is it like, father or mother?'

That's what I want to know. Not from rumours, but from what I heard and saw myself.

'but I guess... I won't be able to do that... because my time is limited.'

I rarely meet his father at this New Year ball. Maybe he was too focused on his daughter and mourned the day his wife died on the same date his child was born. So I only get to meet him at least once a year which is on a founding day.

Anyway, that's enough for me. Being able to see his face is enough even once in the three days of the ball. But now,

'This year I won't be able to see him from the side anymore...'

Because right now I'm lying in my bed. As a result of a disease that has no cure. It's been three years since it destroyed my body. My body is shrinking day by day.

My body which used to look healthy is now a skeleton.

'in the end, I didn't have a chance to confess to him even once.'

because I'm a coward and I don't believe in myself. I could only look at him from the sidelines and never once did I express my feelings to him even after he had been single.

'I really regret it...'

If only I could express everything just once, even if I was rejected, that would be enough.

'god...let me meet him just once... and I'll make sure my feelings reach him.'

So please... listen to me, god.

****************

that's what I was hoping for before I took my last breath and suddenly I woke up again in my bed, with a body that looked healthy, 3 years before the day of my death.

When I woke up, to be honest, I was so shocked and almost crazy.

But after thinking about it properly, there is only one conclusion I can reach,

'maybe God heard my plea at the end.'

And he immediately sent me back three years before I died. So that I can fulfil my wish that was not fulfilled before.

'well... this is all a recap from last month... now I've already settled down and thought about what I should do for my second life.'

To ensure that everything is achieved.

First of all, what I have to do is, I have to make sure my body is fat!!!

why fat?

"well... because the disease in my body now will consume all the nutrients and whatever is in the body!!"

So even though this disease will not eat away at me quickly for now, in no less than 3 years, my body will eventually be just bones.

Because the longer time passes, the crueller this disease becomes.

In the first year, it will not show any obvious symptoms, but in the second year, the second stage will begin. I will start to lose my appetite and when I eat I will immediately throw up. Because of that, my body will start to shrink.

'the worst thing is, I only found out I was sick two years before my death because of the symptoms. But by then, it was too late.'

Because I am a noble lady who always takes care of my body, my weight is enough for my height. And that all made things worse.

'my body is losing weight at an absolutely terrifying rate.'

I tried to survive by eating as much as possible and holding myself back from vomiting. But those are all just preventative measures that are effective in the second stage. It was ineffective in the last stage.

'I still remember the doctor in my first life used to tell me this-

'And I'm sure at that time, what he was trying to tell me, must be... if I don't become like other noble ladies and make myself fat, maybe I will be able to survive more than 3 years.'

Although his advice is not a solution to this disease and only to prolong my life, it is enough for me.

With this step, the probability for me to be able to implement my two more goals will be higher!

"Work hard Jasmine!!! you can definitely do it!!"

Screamed me in my room alone when everyone was sleeping.

From tomorrow onward, I will run my plan right away.

****************

As I wanted, I started fattening myself up.

Although my family looked at me strangely and they asked worriedly why I suddenly stopped dieting. I said to them,

"I think fat is healthier than thin!! so don't worry... I'll be fine."

In the beginning, my mother strictly prohibited me from eating a lot, unlike my father who was only happy when I finished 3-5 plates of rice and side dishes, as well as vegetables.

But after time passed, days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months and I still didn't change my behaviour, she finally gave in.

Nowadays she just says to me,

"eat well. don't rush. we won't steal your food."

while smiling softly at me. I was a bit surprised when she didn't object at first, but as time went on, I felt happier seeing my mother's attitude that also changed for my sake.

and now, 6 months later.

dudun!!!*

"93.6 kg!!! yeay!!!"

Finally, I managed to fatten myself who used to maintain 55 to 60 kg for my height of only 160 cm.

'first plan 'fat' finished!!! banzai!!!'

My brain began to celebrate my success cheerfully even though my exterior only smiled a little.

'Now that I finish this... I shall proceed to the next stage!!!'

*************

To be continued.