Chloe

Feb 6, 2014, Thursday.

My feet are as heavy as my heart as I trudge toward the VIP room. Clementine was smiling so cheerfully when she told me RJ was here, but I know this is bad news for me.

I snitched her out to Jon yesterday. And today, I got a day full of death glares from RJ and her friends, which affected my friends too. Emma was frightened and on edge all day, while Adrian seemed to enjoy the unusual attention.

Recalling RJ's expression sends a small shiver down my spine. She must be so angry at me, but that did nothing to stop her from coming here again today...

Gulping down my dread, I enter the room.

RJ has changed out of her tennis jersey and is wearing a maroon blazer with a black skort and a matching bralette. Heat flushes my cheeks. The blazer covers up most of her torso, but I can still see a tiny bit of cleavage and a slim, defined midriff. This girl can pull off anything she wears.

I clear my throat before I greet, "H- Hey, RJ. You're... back."

RJ responds with a short tilt of her head. Carefully, I shuffle to her side and sit next to her. She taps her temple with her finger, and I take my mask off.

I can feel the anger radiating from her. A sort of cold, controlled anger, like ice that burns to the touch. Before she can berate me, I blurt, "You said I could tell him hor."

RJ regards me with a strange, contemplative look. "Yep, I did say that."

"So- So it's not completely my fault hor." Right after saying that, I am hit with a pang of guilt. "But is- is everything okay, um, between you and Jon? Did I... Did he... I..." I clear my throat again. "I didn't mean to snitch lah, I- I just didn't want you to come here again mah. I'm..."

Her eyes not leaving my face, RJ leans back on the couch and spreads her arms out. "What exactly did you think snitching to Jon was going to do?"

I shift my butt a few times. "Uh, I was hoping, like, maybe, he would stop you from coming here again."

"You think he can stop me?"

"He's your boyfriend mah, so I thought..." I trail off. What had I even thought? How could I think a boyfriend could control his girlfriend like that? My cheeks flush even more.

RJ looks away. There is a long pause before she says, "Jon is not my boyfriend."

"Huh?"

"Our relationship is fake lah."

I blink. "What? Why?"

"He's the oldest son of the biggest conglomerate in South East Asia," RJ explains. "So his parents are super paranoid about who he hangs out with and stuff. They've become a lot more lenient with him ever since he started 'dating' me, so that's why he wants to do this lor. And also, he gets way too much attention whenever he's single, with everyone trying to set him up left and right, and he doesn't like that." She runs her hands through her brown hair and adds, "And the same for me lor. I don't want any... male attention."

"Oh." The two of them indeed get a lot of attention in school. Both their parents own large companies—Soon Kwek Foods for Jon, and Shin Tech for RJ—and everyone in school talks about them as though they are celebrities. But for some reason, I assumed that meant they were very compatible with each other. To think that their relationship has been fake all this time...

"But you two are so... close," I say.

"Yeah, well, Jon and I grew up together mah. We're basically siblings lah. We're even closer than our actual siblings. Our parents wanted so badly for us to get together since we were young, but we both ended up disgusted at the idea. At least I am disgusted lah..." She taps her fingers on the leather cushion as she trails off.

I recall the interactions I've seen between RJ and Jon. The two of them are so comfortable with each other. The way they exchange glances every so often as if communicating telepathically, and the way they touch each other on the shoulders or slap each other on the back... Is that just a sibling-like relationship? I don't have siblings so I cannot relate to it. But they are definitely close, so close that they have the entire school fooled.

Without thinking, I utter, "That's kinda sweet..."

RJ turns back to me and raises her eyebrows. "Really? You think?"

My face flushes. I do not know why I said that out loud. "Yeah, I- I think so? Your fake dating seems more real than some real relationships lor." More real than my mother's relationship with my biological father, that's for sure...

"Yeah, I can see that. Maybe it's because I do love Jon, just not, like, in a romantic way." She shrugs.

"Oh..." I glance at her. "No wonder you were okay with me telling him about this."

"Not really, but I trust him enough to not say shit to people lah." Her brows furrow. "But if you dare tell my mother hor, then we'll have a problem."

I grip my dress. My mother also does not know about me being here, so I understand RJ's wishes. "I won't lah. A- And I'm really sorry for telling Jon, by the way."

RJ rolls her eyes. "Finally, a proper apology for what you did."

"S- Sorry... I- I know you just want to help lah, but this... Coming here and spending all this money, it- it doesn't feel right. I... If I didn't need the money, I wouldn't do this either, you know..." My grip on my dress tightens and I take in a deep breath. I don't like to reveal this, but I feel like I owe RJ an explanation. "My mother... She has glaucoma."

"What's that?" RJ asks hesitantly.

"It's an eye disease. There's, like, damage to the nerves in the eyes and... I don't know lah. All I know is that it can lead to blindness."

RJ's eyes enlarge. Her face slowly scrunches up like she was punched before she looks away. "I'm sorry," she says, her voice the lowest and gentlest I've ever heard. "Can it be treated?"

"It can be treated, but it can't be cured, so whatever vision loss she already has will be... permanent. But it can be treated to stop it from getting worse, from getting to complete blindness..." My voice trembles and I take another deep breath. I have not revealed this detail to anyone, not even Emma and Adrian. I don't know why it's spilling out from me now. "We buy eye drops to treat it for now, but it doesn't help that much lah. Even the doctor doesn't recommend it much. It also runs out super quickly, so we have to keep spending every month, forever and ever and ever, for some stupid eye drops that barely work."

"Are there other ways of treatment? Like, surgeries?"

I nod. "But we can't afford it lah." A sigh escapes my throat. "Our insurance covers part of the cost of the eye drops, but not the surgery."

My eyes drift away from the crestfallen RJ. "I have a time limit, RJ," I whisper. "I know I'm falling behind in school and everything lah, but my mother's vision is deteriorating by the day, you know. She already cannot see words on the computer screen, and then she lost her job because of that. She found some new jobs but... they're tough. Like, very, very tough. I worry about her lah. If her eyes get any worse, I- I don't know if she can even find a job anywhere else."

"They're not supposed to fire people because of health problems," RJ states. "That's not legal."

"I know, but they say they fired her because of budgeting issues. So what to do..."

"Bunch of fuckers," RJ mumbles. She glances at me. "How much is the surgery?"

I purse my lips. RJ is rich, but if she's asking this question so she can give me money directly... I don't want it. I don't want her to be throwing her money at me. Not like this.

She senses my hesitancy and changes the question. "How much longer do you have to... work here for?"

"I don't know leh," I admit. "If- If I keep this up, maybe... the whole year?"

"The whole year? What about your A levels? Don't you want to get into universities?"

My heart sinks as I think about the major national exam at the end of the year. "I'll just take time off for a month before that lor. I- I don't know lah, I'll figure it out." I say that but I know that my grades are atrocious. It was bad enough last year before my mother's health scare, and it's been spiraling further downwards since I started to work. But I cannot afford to think about this. Not right now.

There is a long moment of silence as we sit there, staring down at nothing in particular. RJ is frowning the hardest I have ever seen her, and her fists are clenched. Is she still mad at me? Maybe she's upset about my flippant attitude towards school.

Finally, she grabs her bag and takes out a few folders. "Okay, you have a lot to catch up on then. You have to keep your grades up throughout the year if you want to do well in A levels."

I glance over at the labels of the folders. Chemistry, Physics, Math, Economics... It is every single subject we take. I feel my soul leaving my body.

"How are you so good at all the subjects ah?" I ask sincerely. "It's not like you don't have other commitments in life lor. You're in the tennis club, you play for the school team, you help the teachers out a lot, and you have a proper social life lor. And you do them all so... effortlessly, I don't know lah. You're like... a genius."

"I'm not lah. I just grew up preparing for this. I've been attending extra lessons since kindergarten and going for private tutoring for every single subject. I'm not smart or hardworking or anything lah, I'm just... well-prepared." She pauses. "Too well prepared."

I stare at her in disbelief. "How are you not tired of school by now?"

Her lip curls a little as she chuckles. "How do you know I'm not?"

"I don't know, you're always so..." Intense. Fierce. "...energetic."

"Coffee helps."

"I drink coffee too leh..."

"Chloe." She looks at me with a strange glare in her eyes. "I don't have anything to worry about in life other than school. I don't have it as hard as you lah. So please, shut up and let me help you, okay?"

A pout grows on my lips. "Okay... I hate Chemistry though..."

"That's fine. What subject do you want to start with then?"

"None," I admit. "I want to sleep."

I expect RJ to scold me for that statement, but instead, her expression softens. "That's fine too. You look tired."

"Do I? My makeup is supposed to cover my eyebags..."

"I can still tell lah." She taps on her lap. "Rest. We'll start when you wake up."

A warm shudder runs through my body and ends up in my stomach. All the anger that RJ had from the day has vanished, and she is now the nicest person ever.

Without question, I lie on the couch and place my head where RJ tapped. She takes off her blazer—revealing the rest of her broad shoulders and toned arms—and places it on me. Despite the fierceness in her eyes, and despite her lack of smile, she is very gentle as she cradles me in her lap. I am warm both with her jacket and with the fuzzy feeling growing inside of me.

"RJ," I whisper, "I'm sorry for telling Jon, but please don't waste money just to do homework with me here."

RJ glances at me before leaning back on the couch. "Go to sleep lah."