After that night, I spent several months preoccupied with when I might see Ana again. At length, I resigned myself. If it was going to happen, it was going to happen when it was damn well ready to. Months became another two years. Zayde moved in with the family, making me full-time landlord of the farm. I got my PhD and immediately signed up for post-doc. Finally, the pandemic began to recede. I felt safe enough to take an occasional houseguest.

Enter Josefina, a friend from drag nights and trans support group in the undergrad days. While I was getting a hang of life as a farm manager / scientist / augmented transmasc slut, Jo had been working hard on her costumes and practicing her drag act with any friend who'd listen, awaiting the return of live shows. And here she was, back in town for a major benefit drag show just when they needed her.

I'd always had a massive crush on her, and personality-wise we were super compatible, but my shyness (and knowing from conversations that Jo was rather a dick connoisseur) had always kept me from saying anything.

Not this time, though. I'd spent years on the defensive, and was done with it. I was feeling myself now like never before. So, when she texted me out of the blue to let me know that she was flying in for the show at Corn Hole, I said I'd be there with bells on. Then I went to red alert. I was determined to impress. 

The night of the show, I put on my most dapper University TA outfit, including a plaid print western shirt in the colors of the non-binary flag. I put on my vetiver, poofed up the little pompadour I'd grown in isolation, and balmed my lips. A necessity this time of year. Then I pulled out the little silvery disk, unzipped my pants, and put my penis on. I had been warned about not wearing the thing for too long at a stretch, but it was extremely gratifying to be packing on a social occasion. Who knew having genitals that threaten to wake up and betray you at the slightest provocation could be such fun!

Besides, I knew I'd be taking it off at some point. Either I'd be coming home alone and putting it away, or... well, Josefina already had my deepest confidence. Sex or no sex, I was dying to show somebody the space dick and how it worked.

I adjusted my N95 nervously as I stood in line to get carded and let in. A majority of Ithacans had already done away with indoor masking; it served as a pretty good litmus test for whether you actually gave a shit about marginalized people or not. At Corn Hole, a narrow majority of the patrons were masking. Not a bad statistic, considering.

The bar was packed that night. Gold and iridescent streamers hung down everywhere, and I could swear they'd doubled the luminosity of the disco ball. It was a high profile event by local standards, and for a great cause. Proceeds from the show, headlined by Katya Zamolodchikova, would help several popular queer-owned hangouts reopen after being forced to shutter in 2021. Really integral places. A tabletop gaming shop, a coffeehouse, and a book shop.

There was a not-insignificant group of us who were first and foremost showing up to see Josefina, too.

"LADIES, GENTS AND SPARKLY ONES," boomed the announcer, "GIVE IT UP FOR JOLENE CUISINE!"

Her three-song set was electrifying. She was done up in sepia tones, with a wide-skirted dress to match, lip synching Dolly Parton and Kitty Wells. Had the country girl schtick down to a T, too. I watched, rapt, and then I elbowed my way to the front to be the one to offer her a hand coming down off the runway. 

"Darlin', you made it!" she said with a sweet smile.

I couldn't smirk with the mask on, so I just winked and pantomimed finger guns.

"With bells on, as promised. You were unbelievable! Hey, uh. Can we talk outside?"

She nodded. "You got stamped, right? Great. I'll meet you out front in five, I just need to get out of this bulky ass thing."

It had snowed on and off all day. The moon and stars were out for the moment, despite the light pollution. It was a mild night relative to upstate in February. The frosty tang of car exhaust and wood smoke was sharp in my nose, but not quite a spearpoint. Just the same, I was quite glad I'd grabbed my parka from the coat-check.

I heard footsteps tramping over the packed snow, turned, and saw Jo. She was radiant. She'd swapped out the dress for a pink gingham blouse and jeans; her jacket was fleece and suede, not quite rated for northeastern winters, but adequate for tonight. She still had the spurred brown leather platform boots that added an inch to her already above average height, the massive blonde wig, and her drag makeup, a cartoonish exaggeration of a rosy-cheeked southern belle. 

The wry smirk I'd had at the ready just evaporated. I couldn't help the look of wide-eyed overwhelm. Couldn't even speak. Fortunately, she didn't wait for me to. She strode up, wrapped her arms around me and pulled me close. And I squeezed right back with those arms I'd been working on the past two years.

For a long moment we just stood there, Josefina humming faintly with contentment. My face fit neatly into the cleavage of her taped-up, padded out chest.

Reluctantly, we came apart.

"Josefina, what can I say. Baruch HaShem. You're a vision. Could I see a little spin?"

"What, this old thing?" she said, turning slowly in place. She was still halfway into character.

With her well fitted jeans and coat, you could really see it. The cute, but relatively flat butt I'd known had become a wondrously rotund sculpture of hard-earned muscle and hormonally redistributed fat. Her legs, we'd all seen during the set, were as lovely as ever.

"Damn. I see we've both been hitting the home gym."

"Flatterer. Me, I'm just relieved they booked Katya and not Trixie. I'd have been worried about the comparisons."

"There's no comparing. You're our queen. A hometown hero."

I paused for a moment as a salt truck rumbled down the main road behind us. Then I continued:

"There's... another reason I was eager to see you. Spent a long time trying to get up the nerve to say it."

I'd done the hard part, now I was committed. Still, my ears got hot, and the words caught in my throat. I almost regretted being out here with my mask off, unable to hide anything behind it. At any rate, Josefina's hazel eyes were locked with mine. Her already warm smile got a lot bigger. When I didn't say anything right away, she nodded.

"Go on, hon."

I cleared my throat. "Josefina, I like you. A lot. You're kind, and fun, and talented and absolutely gorgeous. I hesitated to talk about it, at first because I was shy and didn't think you'd be interested, then later because we're such valuable supports to each other. I don't want to spoil what we have. If you have that fear too, I'll back off. I don't want to—"

"I don't," she said, firmly enough to startle us both. "I mean, I do care deeply for what we have. But I believe it's strong enough to change shape and not break."

I cleared my throat a second time. Damn my Steinmetz sinuses and this winter weather.

"You mean you also like me, in that way?"

She reached out and put a hand on my shoulder.

"Of course I do! You're one of the handsomest, smartest, sweetest people I know."

"Alright then," I said, emboldened by the gleam of her smile. "Come home with me tonight. You haven't seen the farm yet. Not to brag, but it is charming as hell."

We'd crested the toughest, most uphill part of the conversation, and now I could feel anticipation pulling me onward.

"Shel, Are you saying—"

"I'm saying I could talk your ear off all night about what's happened in your absence. Some of it was... too downright strange to explain via text. If all we do is catch up, I'll be a happy man. If we should happen to make out a bit—or fuck all night—that would be great too."

Josefina blushed.

"Alright, cowpoke, you've got a deal. Let me say goodbye to the girls and tell Steph I won't be crashing tonight. Then we can slip out quick, after the company bow."

Katya's act had already started when we came back in. She delivered the goods, of course; she had awesome stage presence, and made a fine art of camp. We sat with her cousin Stephanie in a little mezzanine section off to the side, set aside for performers, exchanging small talk among the three of us and furtive looks between just the two of us.

Miss Zamolodchikova received thunderous applause, and fans of every gender were all vying for her attention to hand over wads of bills. She tucked them provocatively into her cleavage, then after the final number, called for the stage kitten.

"Kitten," she said with a serious face, "I want you to take every ruble in this fat stack of tiddy cash, and add it to my proceeds that'll go directly to rebuilding this scene. Ithaca, give yourselves a big hand! You've raised over ten thousand dollars tonight alone! Thank you so much, for caring, for being here, for being an amazing audience, I love you, I love you, I love you!"

Josefina ran up to take her bows with the cast, and then ran right back. Steph and I were only vaguely acquainted, but the mood of the evening was infectious, so I offered her a hug and she accepted. Then we intersected with Jo at the bottom of the steps, a few paces from the entrance and box office They hugged a second time. Steph said,

"Alright bitch, I'll see you tomorrow. Drive safe kids!" She glanced down at her phone and grinned. "I'll follow you out. I just told my hubby we have the place to ourselves, and he's already sending me filthy propositions."

I held the door for them. Outside, it had started to flurry again, and the wind was whipping it around, but I could scarcely feel the cold. Or for that matter, the ground. In my bliss, I very nearly lost my footing right there on the front sidewalk and ended up on my ass. Josefina caught me.

"Careful, cutie. Oh, hey, I think I see your truck."

Thankfully, it wasn't far to the side lot, and the truck had all-wheel drive.

"Yep," I said, "That's us. Take care, Steph!"

We managed to get across the parking lot without further incident. We were back on solid ground now, and maybe I was still feeling the adrenaline from almost busting my butt. I turned and reached for Josefina. I remember the moon and streetlights shone a lovely pale yellow in the shimmer on her cheeks. I put my arm around the back of her neck and shoulder; they were still warm from the exertion of her set. She smiled and bent her head, I stood up just slightly onto the toes of my boots, and we had our first kiss. It was worth the wait. Long, lingering, warm and pillow-soft. It left the slightest bit of moisture behind on my upper lip.

"Let's drive, Shel."

***

It was a quick ten minute trip through downtown Ithaca, out into suburban East Ithaca where Cornell extended its last tendrils, past the physical sciences complex where the lab had burned two years ago. It was fully rebuilt now; you'd never have known it was the site of an engineering error so severe as to cause dimensional collapse.

"I hope you won't think less of me," said Josefina, "but I went back to Planet Fitness last summer. Hard to build this ass at home. I always wear my KN95, of course. I ain't no Typhoid Mary."

"I get it. And thank you, for bringing your act and your ass back to town."

"Okay, Shel, I have to ask. What on earth made you think I wouldn't be interested?"

I grinned sheepishly.

"This is going to sound dumb," I replied, "but I figured I wasn't your type. That your type had a big dick."

"You're right, that is dumb. But I get it. Our brains come up with all kinds of silly reasons not to stick our necks out. Sure, I like a big dick. No doubt the one you keep in your bedroom would make me very happy."

"That's true. In fact, I have a little surprise for you. I got a new one that's even better." I smirked at the thought of all that'd have to be explained.

As we passed the lab, the continuous suburbs rapidly gave way to farm country. We started up the hill toward my place.

"Myself, I always thought you might be into me, but I never wanted to push the issue. You were working through a lot of stuff, just like me. Trauma, dysphoria, second puberty—"

"Fuckin' A." I nodded.

"And I guess I also thought it unladylike to make the first move. Thank fuck you said something, I could've left town again with both of us too chickenshit!"