Motema

It’s a saturday afternoon in the middle of winter, heat blows up from an air vent under the couch as a little girl sits in her fathers lap. He pulls her long, thick hair up with a brush, pushing through any knots then letting the curls fall back on her dark skin. Her slightly older brother saunters in from the hallway, plops himself down on the hickory brown couch, next to his father and sister, and grabs the tv remote off of the oak table.

“You brush your hair?” His father asks without diverting his attention away from his daughter's hair. His voice was deep, with a faint yet rich african accent.

“Yea…” His son replies mindlessly, not diverting his attention away from the tv.

The man looks at his son, and, taking the brush in his hand, he leans over and runs the brush through his son’s loose afro. The brush gets stuck on a wad of tightly knotted curls to which his father responds by forcing the brush through, breaking up the knots. His son winces in pain,

“Ow, Baba!” he exclaims.

The man takes the remote out of his son’s hand and leans back on the couch,

“I want all those knots out before your mom gets here.” He says strictly

“Fine.” his son said with a frustrated sigh. He gets up and begins walking back down the hall.

“Don’t give me no attitude!” His father shouts as he returns to brushing his daughters hair,

“You wouldn’t have so many knots if you took better care of your hair!”

“He’s lucky to even have it, right Baba?” His daughter said, looking up at him.

“That’s right, when I was y’alls age grandma made me shave my head every couple of weeks.” He says, running his hand through her hair.

“To keep clean!” she says happily.

“That’s right.” he smiles at her, proudly.

“I’m glad we don’t live in a forest.”

“The forest is a beautiful place, as long as you stay out of trouble.” he wraps his arms around her.

“If you stayed, would you have stayed out of trouble?” she asks.

He leans over her shoulder and looks at her, “probably not.” he responds with a mischievous smile.

They laugh and he kisses her on the cheek before continuing to brush through her hair.

“I’m still glad you moved here.”

“Me too, if I didn’t move here I wouldn't have met mommy, and you wouldn’t exist.”

“You mean mamá.”

“Si, mamá.” he said with a smile.

The man continues brushing through his daughter's hair when he hears the front door creak open. He turns his head as a man looking to be in his late twenties walks in. He had short, black hair, almond shaped eyes in a blueish green shade, and wore cotton pants with a cotton tunic top.

“Uncle!” his daughter shouts excitedly as she jumps up and runs over to the man.

The man kneels down and greets her with a hug, “Hey!”

“What are you doing here?” Her father asks, agitated, as he walks over.

“I wanted to see the kids before Kil picked them up.” He responds as he stands up, keeping one hand on the girl's head, “where’s Cor?”

The brother comes out from the hallway, “Uncle Jade!” he exclaims as he runs up and gives the man a hug.

“Hey!” he responds with a laugh.

“Cor, take Iri to your room and finish brushing her hair.” His father demands.

“But Baba-”

“Now.” He interrupted.

“Ok,” He turns to his little sister with a smile, “come on.” 

He takes her down the hall and the father turns his attention back to Jade.

“What are you doing here?” He asks again, with a lowered voice and more alarm.

“I just said, I wanted to see the kids.” Jade says with a confused smile.

“You should’ve told me you’d be early.” The man holds himself shakily.

“I didn’t think it mattered.”

“Well it does, you can’t just show up unannounced, it looks suspicious,” He let out a heavy breath, “I need to know so we can have an excuse.”

“My excuse is I wanted to see the kids.”

“Yea, but when you don’t leave- Its gonna be suspicious- Kil’s gonna ask why you're here, why you're staying.”

“So we say we’re hanging out, it’s pretty normal for friends to just hangout.” Jade remarks.

“Don’t be a smart ass.” He says, bitterly.

“Motema,” Jade steps closer and puts his hands on his shoulders, “breath.”

Motema takes a deep breath as he tilts his head back to look up at Jade. Jade moves one hand down to his chest,

“Nobody’s gonna find out, ok?” he whispers.

Motema exhales heavily, looking down at the floor as he does,

“Ok.” his voice cracked.

Jade puts his hand on Motema’s chin and tilts his head back up, while leaning down, 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Jade smiles and leans in to kiss him, when he pulls away Motema lets out another heavy breath. Jade stands straight and puts his arms around his neck, smiling,

“You're cute.” He whispers.

Motema half smiles and wraps his arms around Jade, resting his head on his shoulder.

Jade pets Motema’s hair, “I promise next time-”

Motema pulls back and looks up at him, “Next time?” He asks with raised eyebrows.

“Ok…” Jade pauses and revises his words, “I Promise, If i come early again, I will text you beforehand.”

“I appreciate it, but just don’t come early.”

“Tem-” Jade is interrupted as the door begins to open.

Motema pulls away from Jade, crossing  his arms back over his torso.

A woman with long loose curls and light brown skin walks through the door. She had black liner tracing her brown eyes, and wore a white blouse tucked into a solid black pencil skirt.

“Hey!” her heels click as she walks over to hug Motema.

“Hey,” Motema responds, hugging her awkwardly.

The woman turns her attention to Jade,

“What are you doing here?”

“Me and Tem have plans, I came a little early to see the kids before you got them.” Jade responds, smugly.

“What do you have planned?” She asks.

“Just, hanging out.”

“You know, I can take the kids to my parents, then I can join you guys. I mean, it has been a long time since the three of us hung out.” She smiles, looking between the two of them.

Motema shoots Jade a look saying, ‘I told you so.’

The kids come out from the hallway and The girl runs up to hug her mother, while the brother walks over and stands to the side.

“Hey!” she exclaims as she hugs her daughter, “why don’t you two go ahead and get in the car, I’ll be out in a minute.” She says while looking at her son.

“Ok.” He responds before taking his sister’s hand and leaving out the front door.

“So, is that ok?” she asks, looking back at Motema and Jade.

“We would love that,” Jade starts, “but we wouldn’t want to bother your parents.”

She waves her hand, “They love having them over, it's not a problem.”

“Well then. I guess there's no reason you can’t join us!” Motema says, excitedly, with a big, fake smile.

“Great! I will text you when I'm on the way.” she says as she walks towards the door.

“Sounds good, we’ll see you then, Kil.” Motema opens the door for her. 

He watches her leave before closing the door and turning his attention to Jade.

“This is why we need excuses.” he says gruffly.

“Ok, thats fair, but she had a point,”Jade starts as Motema rolls his eyes and walks over to the couch, “It has been a while since the three of us hung out,” Motema takes a seat and Jade sits down next to him, “This could be fun.”

“I had plans, I was gonna make vegan Kanda, I already have everything prepped for it.”

“We can do that tomorrow instead, it’s not a big deal.” Jade takes his hands in his.

“I know, but,” Motema sighs, “It just bothers me.” he mumbles.

Jade smiles, “aw,” he moves one hand to Motema’s chest, “I’m sorry, you were right,” he leans in, “Is that what you wanted to hear?”

Motema half smiles, “yea.”

Jade leans in to kiss him, then Motema lays his head on his shoulder.

“What if she finds out?” Motema whispers.

Jade wraps his arms around him, “She won't, and if she does it’ll be fine. Akilah won’t care, you know that.”

“I know but.”

“I know, you’re not ready yet.”

“I’m sorry.”

Jade pushes Motema up to look at him, and places his hand on his cheek, “It’s fine, you are allowed to take as much time as you need coming out.”

Motema smiles, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Jade responds while bringing Motema back into his chest.

-MIXED-

“Kil’s on her way.”

“How long?”

“She’s stopping to grab beer, so… 20?”

“Hmm.” Jade lays on the couch with Motema laying on him. Jade has one arm wrapped around his stomach, while running his other hand through Motema’s hair. Motema rolls over, facing Jade,

“What?”

Jade moves his arms around Motema’s neck and looks at him endearingly for a few seconds.

“I’m really happy with you.”

Motema smiles, “Me too.” He leans in and kisses Jade before sitting up.

“Where you going?”

“I’m gonna clean.” Motema says as he gets up off the couch.

“No, come back, we still have 20 minutes.” Jade whines.

Motema ignores him and heads into the kitchen. He takes a rag and spray from underneath the sink and starts wiping down the counter. Jade walks over and leans against the other side of the counter and watches Motema without saying a word.

“What?” Motema asks, looking up at Jade.

“You’re anxious.”

“I’m fine.” Motema says as he goes back to cleaning.

“Tem.” Jade cocks his head knowingly.

“Jade.” Motema matches his tone as he stops cleaning to look at him.

“Ok,” Jade holds his hands up in surrender, “I’ll just go sit down.”

Jade sits down on the couch while Motema continues to clean. After the countertops he wipes out the sink, then he moves to sweeping the floors. The front door swings open and Akilah walks in with a six pack of beers in her hand.

“Hey,” Akilah greets as she sets the beer down on the table and takes a seat in the armchair right of the couch, “You didn’t have to clean for me.”

“I didn’t,” Motema starts as he puts the broom and dustpan up, “I cleaned for me.” He says as he walks back over, “You didn’t have to get alcohol, I have some in the fridge.”

“You have seltzers, with like two percent alcohol.”

“It’s five.” He corrects as he sits on the couch next to Jade.

“Same difference.” She remarks as she takes a beer from the pack.

“Not really.”

“You two are ridiculous.” Jade chimes in.

“I’ve got non-alcoholic seltzers too.”

“Passion fruit?” Jade asks hopefully.

“Of course.” Motema says with a smile. He stands up and heads for the kitchen.

“So, Jade, what’s up with you?” Akilah asks.

“Um, just working, mostly.”

Motema walks back with two seltzers in his hand, he places one on the table, grabs himself a beer, and hands the other seltzer to Jade as he sits back down.

“Are you seeing anyone?” She pries.

“Uh, no, I'm not.” He says, tapping his finger on the top of the seltzer.

“I was hoping you’d say that, there’s this cute guy who started at my office, and I would love to set you up, or there's this woman in IT who just got out of a relationship and is looking for ‘comfort’ if you know what I mean.”

“Um, thanks, but I'm actually not dating at all right now.” He says, awkwardly.

She starts to laugh before realizing it wasn’t a joke, “You're serious?”

“Yea.” he answers, plainly.

“Well, I guess we’ll see how long that lasts, mr. can’t stay single for longer than a month.”

“Well actually I haven’t been on a date for like ten years, but thanks for that.”

“Oh, I didn't mean it like that-”

“It’s fine.” He interrupts, taking a sip of his seltzer.

“How ‘bout you?” She turns to Motema, “you started dating yet?”

“No, I have not.” He responds.

“Why not.”

“I’m busy, I've got kids-”

“You only have them every other week.” Akilah remarks.

“Well I’ve also been busy at the restaurant, since I was promoted to sous chef I've had a lot more work on my plate.”

“You have to have some time to date.”

“Ok well, honestly I don’t really want to date. I mean it’s just a roller coaster of emotions and I don't want to deal with that hell.” 

“Ok, dating is not like that.” she scoffs.

“It’s not just the dating though, It’s relationships and things getting serious, and-” he turns to Jade, “you know what I mean right?”

“Um, well, I mean I have had some bad relationships, and you know, breaking up is never easy, but as long as I’m with a good person, I enjoy my relationships.” he says, with a small smile.

“Oh.”

“Are you ok?” Jade asks him, quietly.

“Yea, I just- I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” He says, sinking into the couch drinking his beer.

Later that evening Jade walks back in from walking Akilah out, while Motema lays on the couch. Jade leans on the back of the couch and looks at Motema,

“You ok?”

“Nataka kwenda kulala, lakini siwezi kuamua kwanini.” He says, slurred.

“Hmm, yea, could you maybe repeat that in english for me?”

“Quiero ir a la cama, pero no puedo decidir por qué.” He repeats.

“Yea, see that's spanish, not english.”

Motema pulls himself up and faces Jade, “You know spanish.”

“Well, I’m out of practice and rusty, except for medical terms.”

“I said I want to go to bed but I can’t decide why.”

Jade smiles, “you are going to bed to sleep.”

Motema frowns at him, “why do you decide.”

“Because you are drunk.” 

Motema smiles big, “aww, you're sweet.”

“Ok, let's get you to bed.” Jade walks around the couch and starts helping Motema off.

“I’m not that drunk.” Motema shakes Jade off and immediately stumbles forward into his arms.

“Oh really?” Jade looks down at him.

“Yea, I just wanted you to hold me.” he says unconvincingly.

“Uh huh.” he pushes Motema up, “come on,” He leads him into his room and lays him down on the right side of the bed. He then leaves the room and comes back with a glass of water. He places the glass on the bed side table and sits next to Motema.

“You know I love you righ?” He says, his eyes closed.

“I know.” Jade smiles at him.

“I didn’t mean that you are hell, just relations are scary.”

“It’s ok, you don’t need to explain.” Jade rubs motema’s shoulder, “I’m going to clean up and then I will be back, try to get some sleep.” Jade kisses him on the forehead and leaves the room.

-MIXED-

The next morning Motema wakes and finds a bottle of painkillers next to the glass of water Jade left on the table. He gets up and walks out to find Jade sitting at the dining table.

“Hey.”

“Good Morning,” Jade walks over and kisses him, “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit.”

“Did you take the painkillers?”

“Hmm, not like that.” Motema mutters as he sits down on the couch.

Jade takes a seat next to him.

“I’m sorry-” Motema starts.

“Yea, you already apologized last night.”

Motema closes his eyes and leans back, “uh, why did you let me drink that much?”

“It was two beers.”

“You know I'm a lightweight.” he says, looking at him.

“Well, um, after last night I decided to schedule you an appointment with a therapist.”

“Why?”

“To help with the anxiety, so that our relationship can move forward.”

Motema sighs and sits up, “I’m not your patient, you can’t just diagnose me and set me up with a therapist without talking to me first.”

“I’m just trying to help.”

“Ok, but helping is talking to me about this, not making this decision on your own,” Motema says sternly, “that isn’t helping, that’s controlling.”

“Well, in my defense as a doctor I’m used to taking care of things like this as quickly as possible”

“But this isn’t something to rush into,” he snaps, “I’m not dying or doing stupid things like hurting myself.”

“Ok,” Jade says quietly, “I will call and cancel the appointment then,” He takes a sharp breath, “I was actually headed out, I need to run a few errands.”

“Fine.” Motema responds, looking away from him.

-MIXED-