The group took their seats and Liszt glared at each of them as she set the table. Basil was willfully oblivious to the drama, shoveling food without a word, while Asmo glanced down mournfully. Unlike her brother's remorse, Lili giggled smugly. This was her favorite game.
As Liszt began piling food on everyone’s plates, Basil glanced up from her plate and composed herself. She attempted to begin traditional dinner pleasantries, in order to break the tension. “So, how was everyone’s day?” She asked, gesturing with her fork.
“Fine, Mother. Not like you actually care,” Vie spat, refusing to look up from her plate.
Basil rolled her eyes and waited patiently for Vie to elaborate.
After several moments of awkward silence, Vie looked up long enough to glare at Basil before shifting her head away. “Fine. Just. Fine.”
Basil raised a finger, but decided to drop the subject.
“I made art!” Nyx exclaimed cheerily.
“Could I see it?” Basil asked, between bites.
“Nope, I burned it all!” Nyx replied with a grin, before returning to shoveling down her dinner.
“O…kay, how about you, Asmo?” Basil asked, her voice almost pleading.
Asmo kept his eyes down as he cut his food into small bites. “I found a cache of classical erotic lithographs, so I’ve been taking the lead in archiving them properly.”
“Oh. Neat. Lili?” Basil snapped her head to Lili, her other problem child, hoping for some reprieve of her son’s shame.
“Yeah,” Lilith said in a sing-song voice. “I think we might be on to some sort of breakthrough. They were in an old storage drive labeled ‘new folder 1’ hidden under a file that said ‘Homework.’ And in that there were a bunch of really interesting sub-folders. I swear, whoever got to study those sure must’ve enjoyed their schooling-” Lili began rattling.
“You don’t say,” Basil responded flatly. She’d checked out of the conversation at this point, resolving to return to her dinner.
She held her wine glass up and Liszt filled it silently, before returning to her seat. Basil gestured with “cheers,” but Liszt returned to her seat with a tired glance.
Lili continued describing lewd acts, while everyone on the table except Basil slowly lost their appetites. Basil cut her meat while nodding and occasionally affirming Lili’s story. “Oh really, yup, uh huh.” She said between chews.
As Lili began winding down, Basil glanced up from her food.
“So that was the contents of the sub-folder titled ‘aristocrats’ which is weird because I’ve never seen rich people covered in manure while naked… or only wearing leather before-“
“Lili, I think that’s enough mental scarring for one day,” Vie cut in.
“You have no idea. There was some truly monstrous stuff in there. Anyway, I bet there’s way more cool stuff, but Asmo locked me out of the office before I could get a good look at them.” She concluded.
“That’s great for you both, now-“ Basil started, attempting to rein in the chaos.
Lili leaned back in her chair cooly, and waved her hands dramatically, while regaling Basil with her tale.
“We had to lockpick the door half an hour later because he started screaming about his arm being broken. Appendages flopping everywhere. It was a real mess.” She said beaming.
Basil didn’t look up from her food.
“…bruh,” Asmo whispered gobsmacked at his sister.
“Don’t know why his pants were off and against the opposite wall, but let me tell you that room is trashed.” Lili paused, gesturing as if she was casually checking her nails. “…Wouldn’t go in there anytime soon if I was you. If you get my drift.”
“Okay, so that’s neat. That’s... So neat for you. Wow. Great stuff,” Basil replied between bites, eager to change the topic. “I for one am alright with just leaving that all to you to deal with then.”
“Liszt, darling. How was your day? Hopefully nothing involving divination or pornography,” Basil asked, nearly praying at this point for some sort of reprieve.
“Oh you know, I cooked. Prepared for tomorrow. Lots to do,” Liszt replied dryly. She saw her siblings gesturing to her affirmatively.
Liszt felt her hands shaking at the indignity. She exhaled loudly before glaring at her siblings. “That lot over there decided to do axe throwing indoors, and are lying about the porn to distract you from going into the west annex.”
Nyx looked away in shame as the other two spat out their soup.
“And this whole thing is about them refusing to just be responsible or respect anyone else’s time or energy.” Liszt continued, fighting back tears.
“YO, COME ON!” Lilith cried out.
“HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO THROW AXES IN THE HALLS?!?” Basil screamed.
“THE BIT WAS WORKING!” Asmo exclaimed, gobsmacked at Liszt.
“Do you know how hard it was to keep a straight face for that bit?!? I slid that aristocrat's reference right under everyone’s nose!” Lili whined.
“Reference? That wasn’t a reference, that was bloody chemical warfare!” Vie groaned.
“You have no honor,” Lili complained, feigning heartbreak.
Liszt stood up and loomed over the table. “DON’T GIVE ME THAT!” She gestured at Asmo frantically. “Who was the one that reset his arm? And who was the one who had to clean up all that broken glass. ALONE. AFTER COOKING DINNER!!”
“In my defense, we were supposed to play a board game, but Liszt was busy, and Vie was monologuing,” Asmo replied calmly, without stopping his meal.
Lili crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. “Yeah, well. In my defense, Asmo dislocated his shoulder because his form is pathetic, Nyx uses hax and can apparently use psionics to throw things with pinpoint accuracy, and Vie is plotting some highborn nonsense to undermine you.”
Both Vie and Asmo glared at her in disgust.
Lili glanced around the room before continuing with a sing song voice,“Also Vie threw one into the outside windowsill and I’m pretty sure that damage is permanent.~”
“YOU LITTLE RAT! YOU TOLD ME TO PASS IT BACK TO YOU!” Vie screamed, while slamming her left fist onto the table.
“HOW IS THAT A DEFENSE?!?” Asmo asked rhetorically, almost dumbfounded by her illogical arguments.
Lili rolled her eyes. “What? Asmo shoulda taken my side when Nyx cheated, Nyx shoulda played fair, and Vie shoulda been a better team player.”
She narrowed her eyes and lowered her voice. “From my point of view I’m the victim here.” She said, showing crocodile tears.
“The real victim is the third courtyard window on the left side of the second floor west annex,” Nyx pondered aloud, mournfully.
Basil paused mid-chew. She sat with a full mouth and slack-jawed, and almost with resignation muttered, “Please tell me SOMEONE fixed it.”
Liszt scrunched her nose and sighed. “It’s boarded up, I’ll get to it in a couple of days.”
Basil leaned back in her chair and swallowed. “Right. Because you decided to do this on the 15th of all days.”
The room was quiet for a few seconds before Basil ran her hand through her hair and sighed.“Come on, you’re supposed to be adults.”
She didn’t wait for any excuses before continuing with her obligatory parental spiral. “Do you know how hard it is to work when I’m afraid that someone is going to catch an axe to the head?”
Asmo replied undisturbed, “Theoretically we’re all chucking them in the same direction, so there’s no chance of that.”
Basil grit her teeth at her son’s insolent tone. “Son, I’ve seen you try to throw things. The safest place to be when you’re throwing an axe is smack dab in front of you.”
“…Yeah fair,” He conceded, unfazed.
Basil knew there was no point in making idle threats. They were young adults, and still trying to work out a lot of… creative energy. She waved her hand and shook her head. “Everyone but Liszt, you’re cleaning it up after dinner.”
“But I wasn’t-“ Vie began defensively.
“Do you want me to dust for fingerprints?” Basil cut her off with a glare. “You always talk about being the oldest, start leading by example.”
“…yes, mother,” Vie muttered dejectedly.
“If you keep wrecking shop, I’m gonna have to start assigning chores to keep you busy. Remember what happened to the Northeast wing?” Basil said before shoveling down the rest of her food. “What USED to be the Northeast Wing.”
“That was ONE time,” Nyx grumbled. “And you’re not the one who’s bedroom exploded.”
Basil rolled her eyes for the upteenth time and felt her tension headache deepen. “Look, you’re all adults here so I’m not going to go grounding you, but you all owe Liszt an apology and a boon.”
Asmo bowed his head sympathetically. “Sis I’m sorry and I owe you one.”
Liszt didn’t believe him to be capable of feeling any sort of long term shame or remorse and just shrugged.
Nyx looked up at her and shrugged. “Add this to the list?”
Liszt took out her notebook and sighed, tallying another hash next to countless other favors she would likely never get around to calling in from Nyx. “What’s another dozen favors between family?” Liszt muttered.
Lili frowned and muttered, “Sorry that I'm an adult who cannot bear the responsibilities of her actions, or have the foresight to predict which of my actions are deemed to be inexcusable by other members of this household. And it is unfortunate that feelings were hurt because of my inaction. And for that I am sorry.”
Liszt leaned back in her chair and raised an eyebrow. “All you are doing is saying ‘sorry, not sorry’ with extra steps.”
Lili sighed. “Sorry I didn’t help clean up.” She leaned away before muttering under her breath, “Not sorry for the window.”
Lis sighed heavily. “...Good enough, I guess. That’s three you owe me now.”
Liszt stood up and left the rest of her food unfinished. She paused a second before placing her plate in front of Nyx. “It’s been a long day, we should all get some rest.”
Liszt walked out of the room while the rest of the table fell silent. There wasn’t much food left on their plates and they each took their time in cleaning the dining hall. Vie washed the dishes while Lili and Asmo took inventory of damaged goods. They moved as a group and spent the evening replacing damaged tiles and sweeping.
By the time all the dishes had been sorted, and the floor mopped off the last bit of fine shards, Lilith stood alone in the west hall. Basil had bullied them all into pitching in together, and they worked late into the night to finish the repairs. It wasn’t the hardest work they’d done that week, but it was a cherry on top of an already physically and emotionally exhausting day for everyone.
Lili dragged her tired body to the bathroom and collapsed under the hot shower water. She savored a few brief minutes. She dried her hair and made sure that she’d removed the last of her makeup before putting on her comfiest pajamas and crawling under her plush downy covers. She would typically fall asleep instantly, but she was preoccupied by her sore muscles.
“Stupid rules,” She muttered bitterly. “It’s not like we use that hall for anything, why shouldn’t we make a throwing range?”
After what felt like hours of painful boredom Lili finally began to drift off to sleep. And almost instantly, she heard a loud knock on her door.
“Wha- ‘ello?” Lilith muttered, startled.
The door creaked open slightly. “Can I come in?” Liszt asked, standing in the doorway hugging a pillow.
Lili nodded and gestured Liszt in.
“Hey. Can I sleep with you?” Liszt asked nervously.
“Mhmm. But this counts as one.” Lilith patted the bed and rolled over to give Liszt room. “Bad dream?” Lilith asked as Liszt crawled into bed.
“More like… bad lying in bed every night questioning my existence. But what else is new?” Liszt muttered. “I don’t know why I'm so worried about it. It’s just a day.”
Lili blinked twice, trying to register what Liszt was trying to say, before finally settling on: “Bit daft innit? Don’t you have more… tangible things to worry about? Like sleeping.”
Lilith dropped backwards onto her pillow. She curled up onto her side in the fetal position and tried to go back to sleep.
“You remember what tomorrow is right?” Liszt asked quietly.
Lili flopped over and looked Liszt in the eyes.
“Mhmm. You mean today? Get some rest Liszt. It’s past midnight. Pim would scold you if she knew you were up this late.”
Liszt stared up at the ceiling exhausted, as Lili rolled back over and over.
Liszt shifted in the sheets anxiously. After several awkward seconds, Lili grumbled, “Oh forget it, I love you, and sorry Liszt but I'm calling this. I hate doing this, but this is ridiculous…”
Lili groaned, rolled onto her back and focused for a moment. “NIGHT NIGHT!” she shouted, and snapped her fingers. Lili immediately fell limp and began snoring.
Liszt giggled at the sight. Though she’d promised to never use a knockout spell on her siblings, it was sometimes the only thing that she could do to settle herself down on hectic nights. Or to avoid awkward conversations.
Liszt smirked one last time, before staring upwards for a moment, into the shadows. Her face fell back to a solemn neutrality.
“It’s the 16th.” She whispered to herself. “Happy birthday, mom.”
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