Lenore sat in her room, under the covers of her bed. Samson was cuddled next to her like a furry cinnamon roll, purring as she stroked his head. Outside, rain was pouring, surely to turn to snow any minute now. She could see it coating the window, leaving a shadow of watery tracks cast onto the books sitting on the inlaid seat just below it. 

From her room, she could hear a clunking noise from somewhere else in the apartment. It was either the pipes, the radiator, or… something else. She didn’t want to think about the third option, not after what had happened after her outing with Silas. 

Silas, she thought. Hmm… I wonder… “I just don't know Sammy. Should I text him?” She said as she stroked under his chin, a quiet purr escaping as she did so, “you’re right. I don’t, I'll never know.”

With that, she shimmied her way off the bed around the cat so as to not disturb him. She rifled around the loose papers and receipts that lay on her dresser. “I know I put it here somewhere– Aha! There you are!” She had found a tiny scrap of paper with Silas’ number on it. After figuring her way back onto her bed, she took a deep breath before opening her messages on her phone. 

Lenore (7:43PM)

Hello, this is lenore. 

Silas (7:46PM)

Hey! I’ve been waiting for you to message me!

Lenore (7:50PM)

So you expecting me to go through your pockets? 

(8:02PM)

I’m messing with you. I was actually hoping we could get together again, it was nice to talk to an actual person for a change. 

Silas (8:04PM)

That would be awesome! I’m thinking of a movie and dinner? Maybe something scary?

Lenore (8:07PM)

I was thinking more along the lines of the library? We have a midterm coming up in Monoghan’s class, I figured we could quiz each other? 

(8:30PM)

I mean if you want to… We could find something else to do

“Why isn't he answering? Was that the wrong thing to say?” She thought. “Great. The first person I've really gotten on with and I've already messed it up.”

Silas (8:35PM)

Sorry, my sister was having a meltdown, she needed some help. Study date sounds perfect! When were you thinking?

Lenore(8:40PM)

Tomorrow? Like 5:30? Is she okay?

Silas (8:42PM)

She’s fine now, she just gets like that sometimes. 

Can we shoot for a later time? 7?

Lenore (8:45PM)

Yeah that’s fine. 7 is good.

Silas (8:47PM)

Great! I’ll meet you there around then! Can’t wait! Gonna study the hell out of those historical economies!

“I think he might think studying is a euphemism?” She said to Samson as she locked her phone. Samson chirped as she leaned over to plug it into the charger. “At least i didn’t fuck it up.” She curled into her pillow, a small smile on her face. “Goodnight Sammy,” she whispered, and little later after the clunking subsided outside her door, she whispered, “Goodnight to you too.”

Overnight the rain had in fact turned to snow, Where rain puddles should have been now sat mounds of snow and ice. It wasn’t an atypical thing to happen, especially this late into the year, so Lenore wasn’t surprised when she stepped out of her apartment and into the alley to see the fresh white coating on the ground. It looks more like cookies and creme ice cream now though, she thought as she began her trek towards the campus library. 

Her route would lead her through the park. There would be a lot of families there today, laughing and playing. Freezing their asses off for the sake of a good memory. As Lenore walked she thought about her brother Michael. He would love this much snow. They never got much snow where they lived, heaven forbid if they did. The winters would be even worse with their father if they had. 

Lenore could hear the wind blowing outside, making the double panes of her bedroom window clatter from the force of it. Downstairs she could hear her mother trying to calm her dad down. Their muffled voices traveled more than they thought they did,or maybe they just didn’t care. 

“Len’, is Daddy mad at me?” Micahle asked from the other side of the room. He was crouched on the ground, playing with some of his toy trucks. 

Lenore hopped up from her spot on her bed, the springs creaking as she moved. She crouched down next to him, pulling him into a tight hug. “No, Mikey. Dad just… doesn’t know how to deal with own feelings. He’ll forget about it in a little bit.” She ruffled his hair as he sniffed a little, holding back his tears that she knew were going to spill regardless. 

“Are you sure?” he asked as he wiped his face. Lenore leaned back and cupped his face in between her hands. 

“Yes, I’m sure.” She looked him in the eyes for a minute, making sure he was going to be okay. “Now, what are you playing? Show me how to play too.”

They sat and played for a while until they heard a crash from downstairs. Michael tensed, but Lenore reassured him with a pat on his shoulder. “You stay here and keep playing trucks, I’ll be right back. Don’t come downstairs, okay?” She waited for him to nod before leaving the room. 

Downstairs, Lenore could see her mother, sweeping up the broken glasses that her father had just broken. 

“-And next time, when I say somethin;’ you fucking do it!” Her father, Ben, was standing in the opposite doorway, arms crossed and brow furrowed. 

“What the fuck ‘re you looking at, girl?” he asked as he stepped towards Lenore. She stumbled back a few steps before answering.

“N-Nothing. I heard the glass break and Mikey got scared so i wanted to make sure–”

“What’s he got to be scared of! I wouldn’t be yellin’n’shit if it weren’t fer him anyway!” He stopped closer to the table, flinging a chair out and sending it to the floor. Lenore could see a fresh can of beer on the counter, open and no doubt missing a few drinks. 

Sarah looked up from where she was cleaning the glass on the floor, a deep red mark on the side of her face. “Oh, sweetheart, he’s just a kid, he didn’t mean to–” 

“You shut the fuck up! I didn’t ask you!”

Lenore, now seething with rage, squared her shoulders and looked her father in the eyes. “He’s six. It’s not his fault his coat ripped and it's not moms fault either.”

Ben was fuming when he looked back at Lenore. She swore she could see steam radiating off of him. His boots thunked on the hard wood as he stomped closer to her. He was rearing his hand like he was going to hit her too. “I’ll be dammed a kid is gon’ talk to me like that in my fuckin’ house!” he yelled.

A chill went up Lenore’s spine as he grew closer. The anger she felt moments ago now replaced with fear as her father gripped her arm, ready to strike her.

A car horn startled Lenore as she almost walked into the oncoming traffic. She shook her head at the memory of her father, the chill in her spine fresh as if the event had happened only moments ago. She could feel the wetness on her face from the tears she didn’t know she was crying. She reached up to wipe them away with the sleeve of her coat as she pressed the signal button to cross the street with her other arm. 

She checked behind her toward the park, toward all the families still playing in the snow happily. Perhaps in another life, that could have been her and Mikey throwing snowballs and building snowmen.