Now it's the end of month 8 and tomorrow the next month will begin. That means I have 15 days left before the event. For that, I have to make preparations immediately.

"I have to prepare clothes for my size and also..."

 Because I'm a coward.

 "to express my feelings to Sir Amon... I will write a letter. Yes, a love letter!!”

Then, starting that day, my preparations began. In terms of choosing new clothes, shoes and accessories. And most importantly, a letter for Duke Amon.

 However, I also did not forget to do another important thing.

 "mom dad…" 

I have to tell my parents about my illness. But before that, I had to call a doctor I knew from the past and ask him to diagnose me. Because my words to my parents would probably be in vain without a statement from the doctor himself. 

"Do you want to do a full check-up?"

"yes, doctor."

"May I know if you have any health problems? Have you ever experienced dizziness? Etc."

"ah... that isn't the case, it's just... as the doctor sees, I'm now 'very' healthy. Because of that, I want to know if I have any internal problems or not."

'sorry for lying, sir.'

Because there is no way I can tell him that I already know my illness. So this is the only reason I can give him.

The doctor smiled at my words. Maybe he can agree with how 'healthy' I am. He nodded at me before saying,

"Okay miss. Then I'll start checking you.”

The inspection began carefully. He used various methods to see if I was sick or not. Then,

"Miss... I'm sorry to say this... but miss, your sickness..."

That's when he found my rare desease.

"Then, is there a cure for this desease, doctor?"

I deliberately asked even though I knew there was none.

The doctor started looking at me with an all-wrong face. It was the same face he gave me in the past when he diagnosed me.

Doctor Rafael.

A world-leading doctor. He can find a cure for any disease in this world, but in my previous life, my desease alone was proof of his failure as a leading doctor.

“sorry… this disease is very odd and rare, and indeed… it has no cure.”

And the reason why this doctor knows about this rare disease is because...

"My sister used to have this type of desease before and died. She is a very cheerful and energetic little sister. But one day, this disease took her life. Since then, I vowed to find its cure but, I am ashamed to say... during my 12 years of career as a doctor who travelled all over the world before settling in this country, I… could not yet find a cure for this one...therefore, all I can say is I’m sorry.”

This is the same story Rafael told me before he kept trying to treat me and got frustrated in the end. Due to his failure, he moved from the western part of this kingdom to the northern part and dedicated his life there before I died.

"If that's the case, it's okay, doctor."

I said to reassure him not to worry about me. For my second life, I no longer want to leave a heavy burden on him. But that doesn't mean I will give up. Cause I will also try to find a solution for this.

"Miss...perhaps...the reason why you called-"

“shh… it doesn't matter, sir.”

Rafael looked at me with frozen eyes because of my calmness. I then continued,

"What I want from you is, to keep looking for the cure and... please follow me to explain this to my parents."

"ah... is that so... that's why you're so calm."

Rafael said slowly. He took a different meaning from Jasmine words.

'The reason why this lady called me... is not because she needs a check-up. But because she already knows her destiny and is preparing... and at the same time... she also doesn't want to give in.'

Rafael then stared into her eyes. It can be seen from the eyes of the girl, that she still has this desire to continue her life.

'quite different from my sister.'

Because of that, he also made up his mind. To help this girl, no matter what happens.

"Okay, miss. Let's do that.”

"yes, doctor. Thank you."

We both looked at each other while smiling softly at each other. After that, I immediately took him to see my parents and of course, I asked him to compare his story with mine.

'because there's no way I can tell my parents that I know about my illness before I'm diagnosed.'

So I asked Doctor Rafael to state that he had diagnosed me before and this was also the reason why I started to try gained weight.

Then, as soon as we met my parents and they heard about my illness, at first they didn't believe me. But after Rafeal's doctor explained it, they immediately accepted it. But,

"Jas...My princess... is that why-"

"Is that why you've changed so much, my daughter?"

My mother asked, cutting off my father's words. I looked at her who was looking at me with a very sad look. Not only her, but even my father also looked at me like that. Including all the servant near us. They want to know if this is the reason I changed.

I answered calmly,

"I'm sorry mom, dad... I've known about my condition for a long time. However, I don't know how to explain it to you."

Their faces grew gloomy when I said that. My father then asked,

“if so, how did you get that diagnosis? You're always at home, aren't you?"

"Dad... I found out about this when I went to the capital for the first time."

"ah...at the new year's ball?"

"yes... dad, mom... I'm really sorry..."

Both of them then tear up after hearing my sorry words. They said,

"What do you want to apologize for? You did nothing wrong…”

"That's right my daughter... you didn't do anything wrong to us."

As soon as they said that, they continued to hug me tightly and I couldn't hold back my tears.I began sobbing by their side. They are also like that, including our servants.

After that, we started talking and it was about care and so on. And that's when my mother said,

"In that case, jasmine.. maybe you don't need to go to the party in the capital."

'what-!!!! no that-'

"mom..."

My father then supported her,

"That's right Jasmine, you're not well. Wouldn't it be better if you focus more on your care?"

"Dad..."

**********

To be continued