Erik had learned something new about Talvi to add to his notebook: they had deathly cold feet. Crying out dramatically, he wriggled away from them. “Stop touching me! You’re going to turn me into an icicle!” He’d decided to take Talvi’s invitation to sleep in the- his bed tonight and so far, he was regretting it.

The rain had stopped soon after they’d returned home and back into the warmth of bed. Though the sky was dark, Erik’s mind still whirred like a spinning machine. He’d decided to finally take Talvi’s invitation since he was honestly too lazy to purposefully allow himself to get the back ache he always had after sleeping on the couch.

“Don’t be a baby! They’re not that cold!” Talvi pressed their foot to his leg even harder this time. Like literal icicles being pressed to his flesh, Erik felt like he was wading through snow without snow pants on.

Rubbing his hands against his arms Erik so dramatically said, “Brr!” Pulling up the comforter to his neck he stared up at the ceiling, “I’m dead…I’m dying…You’ve killed me…” The word Kunym almost slipped out at that moment which made his voice go quiet in a moment’s notice.

Warm silence soon fell over the duo, with a comforter hoisted high up till their necks, sleep felt like it was only moments away. Both laid back the cold air from the thin fan above winding through the room.

His hushed voice almost echoed as he uttered, “Thank you for tonight.”

He heard Talvi shift in the bed before murmuring, “How was it for you? You were quiet at dinner.” Moonlight shone in the thin rays through the dark curtains.

“Just taking things in.” The Koskinen’s were a peculiar bunch.

“You know that I’m here if you wanna talk right?”

“I know, its just hard to find the right words to use.”

“It’s like I’m stick in quicksand or listening to static on the other side of the phone. Nothing seems quite concrete yet.” Stammering, Erik added on, “I don’t know if that makes sense, but…”

He heard the pattering of the rainfall roar as it echoed outside. “You know, I haven’t been a great….” Erik’s voice splintered away for a few moments in the dark of the bedroom, “…a great guy. I haven’t asked how you’ve been feeling with the whole situation. I can’t imagine it.”

“I’m …I'm not sure to be quite honest.”

“I was really scared when you disappeared,” They sniffled slightly as they spoke, “You should’ve seen me, calling the officers on your case every few hours, I’m pretty sure your phone should’ve blown up based on the amount of times I called you. It was like you disappeared off the face of the Earth. My dad said not to worry, you’d turn up. You’re Erik after all.”

“But then you didn’t turn up for hours and hours, and I got even more scared. But we found you, safe and mostly intact.” They added a slight chuckle at the end of the crackling sentence, “You’re here now….” Their voice trailed off, but Erik had known what they were going to say.

“I-I- don’t remember anything. Why are you here? You deserve better than someone who can’t remember you.” He heard the pattering become angrier; less like soft pattering and becoming more aggressive and miserable.

“I can’t give you who I used to be.” He vocalized in a gentle nudge. They both knew it, Dr. Mah was smart but Erik was wading through fog so thick he couldn’t see his own fingertips much less his

Talvi was silent for a long while after Erik’s words, he could hear their soft breaths rising and falling as both of them laid still. When they finally spoke once more, “Let me tell you a story. About three years ago, when we first started dating I got really sick. Like hospitalization sickness.”

“I was in a coma for about a week in the beginning of the sickness but after that I was just sitting in bed. For about three months you sat right next to me, slept on a little cot that my dad brought in and just waited there for me to feel better.” Talvi spoke with a smile on their lips, eyes held on their fingers as they played with them.

They twisted and turned the band aid on their finger. Erik was instead focused on their breathy words and their proximity. So close he could feel their soft inhales and exhales on his skin.

“It’s not like we talked much, I was too weak and you were too tired but you just stayed with me.”

Continuing on, “You were there for me Erik, I’ll be there for you. No matter how long it takes to get your memory back and even if you don’t get it back, I’ll still be here.” Like dragonflies buzzed over them, slight cobalt moonlight illuminated Talvi as they kept eye contact with him. Warm cerulean bloomed in their eyes.

Breaking the eye contact, Erik smiled up at the ceiling. After a hefty exhale, his voice was so hushed , “I must’ve been one lucky man.”

“Thank you.” He mused, still feeling like his lungs were half empty.

“I’m not doing anything you wouldn’t do. You might not remember who you were before now but you’re still the same, good, caring man that I've always known. Just continue doing that and I think you’ll be okay.” Erik closed his eyes as Talvi spoke with a mellow tone, like hot cocoa it was hard to not feel at ease near them. The thought drew shimmering and running tears down his cheeks.

Perhaps it was just the warmth beneath the blankets or the Back to back with Talvi as the sounds of pattering rain, like soft taps against the window lured him off to sleep.