After doing some research into ECT and finding testimonials of people who have had it, I kind of got cold feet. There's no guarantee that the treatment will help my depression, but there is also the risk of short-term memory loss and other cognitive disabilities (short and long term). The doctor I talked to about it told me that my memory would come back over time and that the cognitive issues shouldn't be permanent however, no guarantees. I didn't find that too reassuring. Some people said in their testimonials that they'd rather deal with the depression than the cognitive problems they incurred, while was a little terrifying for me. And while they say 80% of patient's are fine, the chance at becoming part of that outlying 20% seems a little risky compared to the POTENTIAL reward. I'm not sure what is worse, brain damage or depression... but at least depression I've lived with for my whole life and am familiar with it. The possibility of inducing a cognitive disability is a little scary to me, but ECT is still on the table. Just not knowing if it will even help paired with the potential side effects makes it really scary to consider. Choices. Decisions. Suffice it to say, I'm still looking into other treatments where the risk/trade-offs are a little more appealing.