This chapter contains a PTSD flashback.

It really wasn’t surprising when I went back up to my temporary bedroom to see Cloud sitting on the bed. What was surprising was his clothing. He wore the beautiful dress and leggings I had first seen him in. The silver charms sparkled in the dim light that came from the window.

“What are you doing?” I sighed, sitting with him.

“Well, I figured I might as well show up in my god outfit,” he shrugged, turning to face me. “I have my statement prepared and am ready to face the court.”

“Cloud,” I firmly said, “do you know where Anna is?”

“What does it matter where she is?” He tilted his head, eyes curious.

“Cloud,” I sighed, getting annoyed, “what did you do?”

“Nothing,” he was obviously lying. I just stared until he sighed and gave in. “I may have… taught her a lesson. And, by that, I mean I left her tied up in the old train station and intimidated her by circling and growling in my wolf form.”

“Cloud,” I hissed through my teeth.

“I was gonna kill her, or at least scar her here and there,” he shrugged, “but I thought I would leave that up to you. You’re the one she wronged, after all.”

“One, I am not killing anybody, not again,” I angrily whispered, trembling. “Two, all you gods are fucked up. First the incest-y, cheating, vengeful Greeks, then the dick-made-of-gold Egyptians, and now you? Kidnapping? Who are you, Hades?”

“For the record,” Cloud calmly said, “Hades is one of the only decent gods who actually loves his wife. He’s not the scary guy that so many try to make him out to be. Well, not entirely, anyway. Yeah, he’s a bit… odd sometimes, but he generally means well. Besides, Persephone can be much scarier than him.”

I stared at his dorky, awkward, shy smile for a bit, then let out a partly annoyed, partly angered groan. I leaned over, putting my head in my hands. He shuffled closer until our hips were touching, then laid his arm along my back. His other arm wrapped around me, holding me tight.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I thought this would make you happy. You’ve been hurt, and I thought justice would help you begin to heal.”

“You mean revenge,” I mumbled.

Cloud hesitated, unsure of what to say.

“Mm, get off me,” I tried to move away.

His grip around me loosened but didn’t leave. “You’ve been alone your entire life. You’ve been abused and neglected, especially emotionally. Come ‘ere.” He pulled me down to the mattress, laying me on his chest. My half-assed attempts to get away were futile. I didn’t even know if I wanted to get away at this point. Cloud tucked my head into his shoulder, running his fingers through my tangled hair.

“Please let me go,” I whispered.

“Not yet,” he gently refused, pulling me up a bit more, although his grip did loosen. I could probably just roll away if I really wanted to. “I would… greatly appreciate you staying here with me. Just for a bit.”

“Why?” I mumbled, curling up tight. I hated to admit it, but part of me didn’t want to leave the safety and warmth of his arms.

“Because… I think…. I think you need to learn how much I care, for lack of better words,” Cloud nuzzled my head, gently kissing my hair and running his fingers through it. “You’ve felt nothing but loneliness and neglect and pain all your life. I don’t want to tell you how you should feel, but I do think you want to get better.”

“How do you know?” I spitefully mumbled.

“I’m a god, Raine,” Cloud softly said. “We can sense large amounts of big emotions. And, when I focus on you, all I sense is fear and shame and hate… directed towards yourself. And, if I focus on your old hometown a few miles south, I sense regret and envy. Someone there wants you back.”

A shiver ran down my spine. Maybe Eli missed me? I hadn’t seen him for probably… a year? As much as I wanted to believe that, I knew it was really the men I had sold myself to. They wanted me back.

All I felt was pain.

My nails tore at the sheets.

My throat was sore from my screaming.

Tears soaked my cheeks.

His grip was harsh on my waist.

The cold blade was so close to piercing my skin.

All I could do was lay there and try to stay still.

“Shh, shh, it’s okay, Raine, it’s okay, I’m here,” Cloud clung to me tightly, nuzzling my head and rubbing my back and arms. “It’s okay. I got you. You’re safe. Everything is okay, Raine. You’re safe here.”

“I-I’m okay,” I managed to choke out, now painfully aware of the tears.

“Oh, Raine,” Cloud’s grip tightened. “It’s okay to not be okay. You’re traumatized and scared and confused. You’ve been through a lot, even just in the past few weeks. You’ve learned about our world faster than I would’ve liked, on top of your trauma. It must be terribly overwhelming. And you’ve barely scratched the surface!”

I could only shakily nod against his chest. Cloud held me tight, crowning my head with gentle kisses and nuzzles. I curled up, half on top of him, half next to him, with my head between his chest and shoulder. His skin was warm, despite being sickly pale. His arms were soft yet strong around me. He gently wiped the tears from my face.

“Thank you,” I mumbled.

“For what?” Cloud softly asked.

“For being here. It…. It feels nice.”

“Always,” he nodded, kissing my hair.

“Please leave Anna alone,” I breathed. “I’m not angry at her. Well, I am angry, but I just… don’t wanna do anything. Let her own group deal with her.”

“Okay. Anything else?”

We were interrupted with a cry, “Amelia! Amelia!”

Alpha Rose called back, “What’s wrong, Cedar? Amber! What happened?!”

I sat up, rubbing my eyes, listening for the answer. Cloud also sat up, a worried look on his face. I asked, “What? Can you tell what’s wrong?”

His expression slowly turned to fear.

I grabbed his shoulders, beginning to panic, “Cloud, tell me!”

He managed to force himself to look at me, not bothering to hide the fear in his blue eyes, “Wolfsbane. Amber has been shot with wolfsbane.”