Jackson and I met at a rush event that Tommy had forced me to come to. It was at some weird run down pizza joint called Peter’s Pizzeria. How they managed to fit 30 brothers and 20 potential pledges into a small restaurant in the middle of a large city is beyond my mental capabilities, but somehow it worked out. I was squeezed into a spot at a small bench between two large brothers who looked like the muscle versions of tweedle dee and tweedle dum. 

Jackson sat across from me in a similar state of being. We were both quiet as mice the entire night, sipping on our soda pops and eating our New York style slices as the brothers talked at us about how great the fraternity is and how much we would enjoy our experience. 

To be honest, it was a nightmare, but at the time I was just a quiet little mousy boy new to college and a big city so I kept my mouth shut. I couldn’t wait for the night to be over so I could just go back to my apartment and sleep. Jackson and I kept looking over at each other, a similar thought very evident by the look on his face.

After the event, I said my goodbyes and left alone. Tommy still had to stay to discuss some things with the brothers, which was better for me. I was walking down the street minding my business when I suddenly felt a tap on my solder.

“Hey! My name is Jackson! I was sitting across from you at the table. I just wanted to introduce myself!”

“Oh hey… My name is Wil. Nice to meet you,” I responded shortly, thinking that he would say goodbye and walk off. Instead Jackson started walking with me towards my apartment.

“Man those events can be rough right? I mean I was fine, but you looked like a mouse trapped between two boulders.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at the analogy.

“Right? I could barely breathe because they were so large.”

“So, why are you trying to join XXN?” 

“My roommate, Tommy, is one of the brothers. He kind of forced me to come. You?”

“Oh Tommy is cool! So… don’t tell anyone but I am kind of a legacy.”

“A legacy?”

“Yup, my dad was a XXN and my mother was a XXM. So, it would be kind of weird not to join.”

“Ah, you’re a nepotism baby.”

Jackson gave me a weird look and I thought I had let my anxious rambling affect the conversation. I was about to apologize before Jackson bursted out laughing.

“OMG, I knew everyone was thinking it but I haven’t met anybody who had the guts to call me out on it yet. You’re hilarious dude.”

“Yep, that’s me, hilarious dude.”

“We got this man! Stick with me and you're sure to get in. It will be us vs the frat boys!”

That night we just walked around the city and got to know each other. It was also that night that I started falling in love with Jackson Choi and ever since then it was truly us versus the frat boys as both of us made it into the pledge class that semester. 

We did everything together. We studied together. We sat together at our pledge meetings. We ate together. We slept together (of course in the no homo way as the frat boys like to put it). 

***

“Seriously, why do they even want us to find half this crap? I mean a pink flamingo, a shark, and an alien?” I asked, annoyed at the current situation I was in. 

As part of the pledge class, we were split into teams to participate in a fraternity scavenger hunt. Luckily, I was in a team with Jackson but I still found the whole idea a complete waste of time. We had two days to find a list of twenty items. Even worse, it was all a giant puzzle and we had to figure out how all of the items were connected.

We had taken Jackson’s car to drive out of the city to see if we could track down a vintage bird cage from a thrift store. I don’t know why the brothers wanted a vintage bird cage, but the more questions I asked the less I actually wanted to know.

“Come on now. Jason and Carlos already found the boxing gloves, the golden boxers, the light saber, and the disco ball. Todd also found the kitchen knife. We are already a fourth of the way done.”

“I mean how are we even supposed to find an alien?”

Jackson just laughed at me and shook his head.

“They obviously mean a toy of some kind. Come on Wil, we got this.”

“I know… I know, I am just nervous. Also, How the hell are all of these things even remotely connected?”

“They are all related to 70’s movies duh.”

I just looked at him like he was crazy.

“Oh my god Wil! Rocky! Jaws! Star Wars! THE GODFATHER? Nothing ringing a bell?”

“Okay I get those but what about the flamingo and the underwear?” 

“Rocky Horror and Pink Flamingos? Seriously Wil you have to get out more! I’m straight and even I know those gay classics.”

At the mention of being straight, it felt like a thousand nails were being driven into my cold little gay heart.

Six hours later and my group finally made it back to the frat house with all of our items in tow. We had gotten there early, so we were just chilling in the dining area. I still hadn’t gotten used to being in the fraternity house with all of the brothers, but surprisingly Jackson did. He was a social butterfly and took every chance he could get to talk to anyone in the frat.

As soon as we had gotten back to the frat Jackson barely spoke to me and instead reserved his attention to the other pledges in our group. They pretty much treated me like I didn’t exist, which honestly was alright with me. As they were all huddled around a single table, I was sitting alone at a different table reading some random novel on my phone.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Why are you sitting here by yourself?”

I looked up and noticed that Tommy had come into the dining area and was now standing over me with a worried look on his face.

“Nothing is wrong, we found everything on the list. 70’s movies right?”

“That’s not what I meant Wil. Why are you just sitting here alone? You should be interacting with your fellow pledgemates.”

I just groaned in response, putting my phone away and walking over to the group and sitting down at one of the empty spaces.

“Hey guys.”

“Hey Wil,” they all said in unison, except for Jackson who refused to make eye contact with me. I stayed silent as they began to talk to each other again. Probably something about girls, but I didn’t really care because I was too busy dealing with this huge lump that started to form in my throat. Jackson acted completely normal when we were together, but when we were in groups it felt like it started to ignore me.

It was then that I slowly started to realize two things as more time went on. The first was that Jackson was way more into the fraternity that I had originally thought. The second was that the more and more time passed, the less time Jackson spent with me. At first I thought it was just a coincidence but I soon found out that it was completely and totally on purpose.

***

I was at the library cafe one night studying for an exam. The cafe was located directly next to the entrance of the library, so I could see pretty much everyone who came in and out but it was hidden enough that nobody really noticed me. I had just randomly looked up when I saw Jackson walk in and go straight towards the stacks.

I was nearing finals so this was the first time that I had seen him for a couple of weeks, so I excitedly got up and tried to follow him. I suddenly stopped and hid behind a bookcase when I saw him talking with one of the brothers from XXN. In fact, it was the president at the time. I knew I shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but it was already too late, especially after I heard my name. 

“Jackson, I think you will make a great president next year! Your father already contacted me with your intent for running, but I have some concerns.You need to stop hanging out with Wil. He is only bringing you down.”

“I know, Peter. You already told me this once. I can’t just stop talking to him though.”

“Yeah, yeah. You’re almost a brother now though and you need to start getting in good with the other brothers so that you can make exec board. You have the connections to be president, but you need the support and you're not going to get that by being friends with that nerd.”

My heart nearly stopped as I quickly ran back to the cafe and gathered my stuff. The tears were already falling from my eyes and my glasses were fogging up. As I quickly set out to leave the library, I bumped into somebody.

“Hey Wil are you alright?” 

I was Jackson.

“Yeah fine… I just ummm… I just need to go.”

I didn’t let him respond as I hurried past him and quickly bolted out of the library doors. Ever since then I never contacted Jackson again unless it pertained to fraternity matters. He also never reached out to me either. Jackson and I were not on the same team any more and I was alone to battle the dreaded frat boys.

It sucked, but I still loved him. I continued to pledge the frat and was inducted in part because of him. Tommy did most of the legwork in that department though, as he was the driving force behind me crossing over from pledge to brother. It hurt, but Jackson was still my rock. He was still my soulmate.