In the week that followed their day out on the town, Ever had found themselves falling into a comfortable routine. They would get up long before Tesla, make their downstairs, where they would share a cup of tea with Julia. They would enjoy the quiet company in the silence of the early morning before heading back upstairs to get dressed. After getting dressed, they would do their share of chores before breakfast and, after the dishes had been done, they would take to wandering the town exploring every nook and cranny in search of a job. It turns out getting transported to another world wasn’t enough to escape the crushing weight of capitalism. Although most places either weren’t hiring or weren’t willing to hire someone with no skills in that trade.
As the list of places in Angel Falls dwindled, Ever was reminded of Cogsworth’s and the barrels of cogs and gears that had filled the shop. The wall of clocks that had lined one side of the store and the wall of prosthetics lined another. The more rejections that Ever got, the more they thought that the place they were destined to work was an airship ride away.
Ever passed a shop catching their reflection, letting out a sigh at the shoulder-length hair that was pulled into a loose ponytail. Ever had been putting off cutting their hair for the last week and every time they saw their reflection they felt more and more put off by it. It wasn’t that they didn’t want to cut it, they did want to very much so. It was more that it felt like a major wholly unchangeable decision. They could change their clothes and put on a binder easily but their hair was different.
Sure, it grew back but Ever knew from experience how painfully slow the process could be. It was also that, as much as they wanted to look less like a girl, the idea of cutting their hair made this all seem all the more real and that scared Ever. The idea that they could finally be themselves was terrifying but Ever wasn’t about to let themselves be controlled by fear.
Not anymore.
Upon arriving back at the boarding house after their daily walkabout Ever grabbed the shears from the kitchen they made their way into the bathroom. They closed the door behind them and walked over to the mirror placing the shears on the edge of the sink.
Ever pulled their hair from its ponytail, they gripped the edge of the sink and glared at their reflection. “New life, new Ever.” Taking a deep breath, they picked up the shears slipping the finger of their prosthetic hand through the handles. They awkwardly snipped the shears a few times to get the feel of using them. Looking back into the mirror they gripped a lock of their hair, squeezing their eyes shut as they cut the lock of hair free of their head. Ever hesitantly opened their eyes one at a time looking at the now off-kilter visage staring back at them. They looked down at the fistful of hair opening their hand and letting it fall to the ground. Ever took another deep breath before grabbing another fistful of hair and repeating the process.
Ever soon found an easy rhythm in watching the locks of hair drop to the floor as they cut them free. They avoided looking up knowing that it was a mess and did not want to lose the courage that they had finally managed to muster.
The door opened and Tesla called out. “I’m gonna help. Jus’ lemme use the toilet first.” The door closed and Ever paused standing as still as they possibly could, hoping that maybe Tesla was part T-rex and wouldn’t see them if they didn’t move. Of course, their hopes were quickly dashed. “What’re ya doin’?”
Ever looked up at her from under what remained of their hair. “Cutting my hair.”
“Do ya…” Tesla spoke tentatively, cocking an eyebrow at them. “…need some help?”
Ever shook their head causing small strands of hair to fall free of their head. “No.” They didn’t trust anyone with sharp objects this close to their neck.
“Are ya sure? You might wanna look in the mirror.” Tesla gestured to the mirror and Ever reluctantly looked up to see the mess they had made of their hair. Just like that the courage that had taken them a week to muster was shattered. The front was much shorter than the back and there were strands that were still shoulder-length. Some strands stopped at their ears while others stopped at their chin.
“Can I change my answer?” Ever gave an uneasy laugh as they turned to look at Tesla who smiled at the worried drifter moving further into the bathroom taking the shears from them.
“Sure. Sit on the toilet backward.” They complied and Tesla ran a hand through their hair. “How short do ya want it?”
“Short.” Ever said as they stared down at the copper toilet. “As short as you can go.” Ever listened as the shears began snipping strands off as Tesla ran her fingers through their hair. A silence fell over them punctuated by the sound of snipping scissors cutting hair.
“You looked pretty before.” Tesla said, breaking the silence.
Ever tilted their head slightly to the left. “Hmm?”
“Don’t move.” Tesla pushed their head back into place. “I thought you looked good with long hair. Why cut it?”
Ever felt her cut a piece of hair close to their scalp as they thought about how to explain this. “It’s not about looking good. It’s about feeling good.”
Tesla stopped cutting and muttered. “Is that why ya wear that thing on yer chest?” Ever imagined Tesla was pointing at her chest as she spoke.
Ever nodded slightly as Tesla ran her hands through their hair. “It’s not that I don’t want to look pretty or handsome or nice. It’s that I want to feel at home in my body.”
The rhythmic snipping began again as Tesla spoke. “I guess that makes sense.” A silence fell over them as Tesla continued to clip and cut their hair until she stopped setting the shears on the commode. “Why don’ you take a look an’ tell me what ya think?”
Ever stood up causing all the hair that had accumulated on their shoulders to the ground. They looked in the mirror to see a different person from who had been staring at them an hour earlier. Their copper hair was cut short to their head, coming to a stop just above their ears, and was messy with strands sticking up every which way. They ran a hand through it, straightening it out somewhat and couldn’t help but smile.
“Do ya want me ta take more off? Or are you happy with how it is?” Tesla asked and Ever turned to look at her. She was holding the shears with her hands on her hips waiting for a response.
Ever brushed the tips of their fingers against the tips of their hair. “It’s perfect.”
Tesla puffed up her chest out and jutted her chin out in pride. “Glad I could help.” She turned, placing her hand on the doorknob before adding. “And I think short hair suits ya.”
The smile that adorned Ever’s face got even wider and they were convinced that nothing could ruin this for them. That nothing could bring them down from this emotional high.
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