[Mei’s POV:Back At The Hospital, Hours Later]

“I’m sorry,” starts the doctor. “But…after the testing. It seems you have stage 4 breast cancer.”

Not giving any kind of reaction to the doctor’s news. I stare outside, noticing that the day is more than half gone. Realizing that, I think, 'Looks like I couldn’t even pick Nami up from school either.’

“I know—“ the doctor hesitantly continues. “This may come as a bit of a shock.”

I have another separate thought to myself. ‘I’m not entirely sure how to think or feel, right now.’ 

“If you’d like, Mrs. Takahashi, I can come back when your husband has returned? Then, I can discu—,”

“No!” I snap, finally looking at her. Seeing as I overreacted, I relax from being tense. “I—I’m sorry. It’s just…a lot for me to take in. But I want to be the one to tell my husband what’s going on with me. So you don’t have to have all the burden on your shoulders. Thank you for all you’ve done so far, Doctor. Really.”

The doctor takes a moment to assess what I said. Looking at me with sad eyes, she says, “I understand. Do you…have any questions for me?”

Keeping a calm composure, I ask, “How long do I have?”

[Honjo’s POV]

The school day has finally come to an end as I walk hand in hand with Nami to the hospital. I haven’t been back to the hospital with Mei all day. I would’ve stayed, of course. But when Mei woke up she was adamant about me being here for Nami, both in getting her to school on time and being there to pick her up. Plus, I had to let everyone know that the bar will be closed tonight due to a family emergency. 

The doctor didn’t call the house all day, so that must be a good sign. ‘Maybe Mei just had low blood sugar, or something like that?’ I conclude to myself. Still…with Mei not home all day, I didn’t feel like myself. 

“Daddy?” Taking me out of my thoughts, I glance down at Nami. She gives me a worried expression just like how Mei used to give when I was deep in my mind about something. “Are you okay? We’re almost to the hospital to see mommy right?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. We’ll see mommy soon.”

‘Right. I need to snap out of it.’ I declare to myself. ‘It’s not good if even Nami can tell if something is bothering me.’

After that thought, we pass by a flower cart and I see purple pansies. Pansies are one of the many flowers that symbolize life, just like Mei’s name.

“Nami. How about we get mommy some flowers?” I say, delaying us from walking.

Nami’s eyes light up like a light bulb, telling me it’s a good idea. “Yes! Can I pick them out?”

“We can both pick out a bouquet.” I say, with laughter in my voice. 

‘Yeah. Everything will be fine.’ I convince myself, picking up the freshly bloomed pansies. 

—

Now at the hospital, we head straight to Mei's room. 

“Mommy!” Yells Nami, excitedly running to jump onto Mei’s bed. Hugging each other, Nami continues, “I’m here now, mommy! How are you doing?”

“I’m great! But let’s not talk about me. How was school? Did you make it to class on time this morning? I know you must’ve been scared that we weren’t home to wake you.”

Nami looks at me for approval to tell Mei what happened this morning. I give her a smile and a slight nod. A smile also appearing on Nami’s face she begins to tell Mei the story.

After listening to Nami, Mei cups our daughters cheek and says, “Wow. You did everything on your own. And even made yourself breakfast.”

Mei’s trying to hide it with her motherly smile, but I can tell something is troubling her. Her voice sounded a little shaky, just now. Like she’s trying to hold back tears. 

“Yep! Aren’t you happy?!”

Gently placing a strand of Nami’s hair behind her ear, Mei responds, “I’m so happy and proud of you. You’re my big girl after all.” 

Mei stares intently at Nami, as she gently pokes her nose. One can tell that even though she’s looking at Nami, Mei’s still lost in her own world. 

Hearing a knock at the door, the doctor lets herself in. “Oh good. Mr. Takahashi is here. I would like to talk with both of you whenever you’re ready.”

“Yes.” Mei starts. “If you could, doctor? May you take Nami to the children’s playroom? Just so she can play with the other kids in the meantime.”

“Of course! Nami is it?” She asks our daughter, in a shrill tone one would use to talk to a dog, or a puppy. 

Nami didn’t make eye contact and leans back into Mei to distance herself from the doctor. “Manami. Only mommy and daddy can call me Nami.”

The doctor glances between me and Mei. We both smile at her to give her the go ahead to continue. “I’m sorry about that. Manami. That’s a very pretty name. My name is Doctor Rio.” Nami still doesn’t show any sign of warming up to the doctor. “You know Manami. Your parents have some boring grown up stuff to talk about. And I’m sure you don’t want to be bored. The playroom has a lot of fun things to do there, so you won’t be bored.” 

Nami’s face still sour, she says, “But I just got here. When can mommy come home?”

“Soon.” Mei intervenes to calm Nami. “The doctors just need me and daddy to sign some papers then we can go.”

“Together?” She asks.

“Yes. Together. Now smile for me?” Nami slowly returns a half hearted smile to her face. “I don’t know. That smile doesn’t seem very genuine. What do you think Honjo?”

“Nope.” I add,  walking up to the side of Mei’s hospital bed. “I think she can do better than that too.”

“Agreed. A lot better.” Nami starts to giggle, then smiles excessively, showing off her cute slightly gapped teeth. Mei rests her forehead onto Nami’s and softly says, “Now that…is a smile.”

Also bringing a smile to Doctor Rio’s face, she watches us with solace and says, “We can get some snacks on the way too, Nami. How does that sound?”

Our daughter looks at both of us for approval. Mei nods her head and I smile, letting her know it’s okay. “Okay. Bye, mommy.” Giving one another one last hug. Nami slides off the edge of the bed and follows the doctor out the room.

Finally alone with Mei, she slides over so I can sit next to her in the hospital bed. I hold her close to me and get a whiff of her scent, that I’ve missed all day. “You were right.” I say, breaking the silence. “She’s growing up way too fast.”

“Not fast enough…as it would seem.” Mei adds, in a distant melancholic voice. 

I look at the top of her head that I was just resting my cheek on and think, ‘What does she mean by that?’

Just as I’m about to question her comment, she beats me in speaking and says, “Honjo. I have stage 4 breast cancer. The doctor says I only have 6 more months to live. How about that, right? And just this morning, we were talking about how our Nami is growing up so fast. But listening to everything that she was able to do on her own this morning, makes me realize that I’m going to miss out on the most important part of her life. Teenage years for a girl is crucial. She’s going to need the both of us the most during that time.This was not a part of the plan, Honjo! We were supposed to get old together!” 

The more Mei talks, the more emotional she gets. Crying into my shoulder, I lift my hand and start to caress her hair. My mind is completely blank, for the first time since our marriage, and I’m not sure if anything I say is going to help.

Moving away from my shoulder so she can look at me, Mei starts to talk in a whiny voice. “Why aren’t you saying anything?” 

‘But still,’ I ponder to myself. ‘Mei needs me right now, more than ever.’ I blankly stare at her, trying to muster the courage to speak. ‘Say something, Honjo. Anything!’

“I’m sorry.” I start in a gentle tone pulling her close to me. “I hear you. I know this isn’t what we wanted, or what we expected. However you want to go about this, I'll be right here by your side. As well as Nami. We’ll be here every step of the way. I love you Mei.”

‘What am I saying?’ I think separately to myself. ‘Is that really the best I can come up with? I can even tell I sounded so monotone.’

“Honjo?” Mei calls me. 

“Yes?”

“Do you remember when we first met? I asked you what your other dream was, and you told me you couldn’t tell me because it didn’t happen yet, at the time?”

“Yeah.”

“Did it ever come true?”

“Mei.” Surprised by Mei’s words, I softly push her off me by her shoulders to stare her in the eyes. “You and Nami are the other dream. I always wanted to settle down and start a family, at some point. And you’ve given me that. Have you really not known that this whole time? I thought it was obvious, after all these years.”

Tears filling her eyes, a smile starts to form on Mei’s lips. “In a way…I think I have always known.” 

I wipe away Mei’s tears as she puts her hands through the unbutton part of my shirt and gently runs her fingers along my chest, like she always does. ‘This is one thing about her, out of the many things that I’m going to miss about her,’ I think sadly.

 “I called it,” Mei adds.

“Called what?” I ask curiously.

“After we met, I went home and told my parents that you were too good to be true. I can’t believe how right I was.” I can hear the pain in her voice, but it didn’t match the love I see in her teary eyes. “I love you, Honjo Takahashi. Thank you…for such an amazing life.”