Ethan walked into school with a spring in his step. Less than twenty-four hours ago he had one of the most amazing conversations with Chris. Ethan was now optimistic and excited by the idea that he and Chris would be speaking more at school as well.

A part of him wanted to locate Chris the moment he stepped into the building. Things that he thought to be important before paled in comparison to seeing Chris smile. It took every sensible bone in Ethan’s body to go to Aiden’s locker instead of Chris's. Ethan hadn’t taken the time to text Aiden everything that happened. So, as far as Aiden knew, Ethan didn’t have anywhere else to be. 

Like any other normal day, Aiden was at his locker, organizing his books. Ethan’s steps sped up as he thought about telling Aiden everything that transpired. So much has happened between Ethan and Chris since Chris first showed up at school, and Ethan hasn’t told his best friend any of it. A large grin spread on Ethan’s face. Finally, he would be able to open up about it. 

“Aiden!”

Aiden’s head shot up when he heard Ethan’s yell. The slight surprise on his face morphed into a pleasant smile, happy to see his best friend. In a matter of seconds Ethan was sending in front of Aiden and pulled him into a brief hug.

“Hey, Ethan.” Aiden replied with a grin. “What’s going on?”

At that simple question, Ethan’s mind went back to all of the recents incidents that happened between him and Chris. Just the reminder of the emotions that had rocked through Ethan being alone with Chris last night brought a flush to Ethan’s cheeks. This really was the best opportunity to tell Aiden. 

“Umm . . . ” Ethan began, scratching at the back of his neck awkwardly. He chuckled softly to himself at how nervous he was acting. “Well actually-”

“Guys!” 

Ethan sighed out in frustration at being interrupted. In fact, he would have mentally complained more about it if he wasn’t then harassed. Ethan let out a loud groan when Meaghan ran into his back, pulling him into a sudden hug. Although it was clearly an affectionate action, Ethan felt as if he had been hit by two hundred pounds and he could barely keep himself upright.

“Now you know how I felt.” Aiden laughed while Ethan groaned from the impact. Ethan could understand why Aiden made the comment. Meaghan usually threw herself onto Aiden and Ethan would simply laugh. Now the roles were reversed, unfortunately for Ethan.

“It feels like two hundred pounds just slammed into my back.” Ethan complained, repeating the thought he’d had in his head. Meaghan released Ethan and gave him a bit of space, not before she pushed his shoulder. Aiden laughed again when Ethan hissed and rubbed at the spot.

“Like I was saying before I got so rudely interrupted,” Ethan began, pointedly staring at Meaghan. Meaghan only seemed a little bashful but otherwise ignored his comment. “I kind of, um, found out something.”

“Really?” Meaghan asked, a curious look on her face. “What?” 

Ethan had been planning on telling them this already, but he suddenly got nervous about it. 

“I think I have a crush on someone.”

Ethan knew he had a crush on someone, but he felt more comfortable acting as if he wasn’t completely smitten. Yet, even that toned down version of the truth had Meaghan squealing and Aiden grinning in excitement.

“On who?” Aiden asked, always the type of guy who wanted to get to the meat and potatoes of a topic. Ethan nibbled at his bottom lip, a slow grin growing on his face.

“Chris.”

And the squeals intensified. Ethan was suddenly wrapped up in Aiden and Meaghan’s arms as they celebrated their realized ship. It didn’t matter to them that Chris's feelings were still up in the air, having Ethan admit to liking Chris was enough for now.

“Oh my goodness, tell us everything.” Aiden said as he pulled away from Ethan. “I want to know all the details.”

Ethan laughed, feeling bashful at all of the attention. His initial plan had been to give all of the details, but now he considered if he should. It might be pointless, but Ethan’s time with Chris has been so special to him. And that day after a pool where it felt like he and Chris were speaking their own language had been especially incredible. Ethan kind of wanted to keep that to himself. 

“We talked a couple of times since he got here so I was already crushing on him a little, but during the trip it was like I saw him in a new light.” Meaghan and Aiden could see the warm look in Ethan’s eyes as he spoke. He was clearly remembering how he felt when spending time with Chris during the trip. Ethan hesitated for a moment. 

Should he tell them about how Chris was ignoring him? Chris had never told him the exact reason why he’d done it and Ethan feared that they would look at Chris in a negative light. He decided to keep that to himself as well.

“And on the way there and back we had some amazing conversations.” Ethan continued, recalling those blissful hours alone. “He’s a great listener and super funny to talk to.”

“Oh, that’s so sweet!” Meaghan exclaimed, her eyes becoming bright. “I love, love. You and Aiden better get your gay boyfriends.”

Aiden and Ethan looked at each other at the same time. They wore identical apprehensive looks at Meaghan’s hopeful statement. Ethan wasn’t sure why Aiden seemed unsure, but Ethan had accepted that his crush would remain unrequited. That tiny, not-so-tiny detail would certainly put a wrench in Meaghan’s dreams.

Meaghan noticed their expressions but chose to ignore them. Meaghan knew that Aiden’s concerns weren’t valid and she hoped that the same would be true for Ethan and Chris. All three of them silently decided that they would just move past this. None of them wanted to argue and it was pretty disheartening for the boys to remind themselves of all the reasons why they couldn’t be with the guys they cared about.

Half an hour later, Ethan was seated in his first period with Ms. Jade. He tried to appear casual, sitting down and staring at nothing in particular, but he missed the mark by a long shot. He couldn’t stop bouncing his freaking left knee and the barely contained grin on his face was far too obvious. He was extremely excited to see Chris. 

Ethan and Chris had been getting more friendly before the trip, but it was still rare that they spoke. Ethan hoped that would change, starting with conversations during first period. Ethan could see it now, him and Chris talking, laughing, and just chatting it up. It would be amazing.

It was with that thought in mind that Ethan saw Chris. He had just walked in with one of his girl friends—Ethan swore her name started with a B—walking beside him. Ethan sat up in alert, an eager expression on his face. Was Chris going to walk over to him or would he call Ethan over? 

Chris caught Ethan’s eyes and set him one casual nod.

Ethan froze in his seat and simply watched as Chris went over to his friends. He was still, waiting for the moment when Chris would get up and come over to him. But, the bell rang, then Ms. Jade began speaking and Ethan realized that Chris never planned to. Chris was already with his friends, he didn’t need any more.

As Ethan went through the rest of his day, he berated himself for hoping for so much. He had assumed that after speaking with Chris so much, he would be considered one of his friends. Now, Ethan realized he had expected too much. 

—————

“So x in the expression is . . . 14?” Ethan muttered softly, unsure of his answer. He looked over the question again, and noticed that he’d made a mistake. “No, no, it would be 48. No, 25?”

Ethan groaned, his hands moving swiftly and slamming the textbook shut. He had been working on his math homework for over an hour now and it had only been getting more frustrating the longer he tried. He was about to flip to the back where he suspected the answers to be but stopped when he noticed the notification on his home screen. 

It was merely coincidence that he happened to look at his phone then. He hadn’t picked it up since he started his work and his notification sound was off. Yet, his eyes had drifted and now he was picking up the device curiously. He just had a feeling and he didn’t know what it was about.

Ethan opened up his messages to see what it was, only to yelp and drop his phone. No one had startled him, and there hadn’t been a shock delivered through the phone. It was the name on the screen that had taken him aback. Chris's name had been there. He was the one who texted Ethan. 

Ethan picked up his phone again, peering at the device through his hands. After a couple of seconds of this, when Ethan couldn’t navigate his phone properly, he sighed, dropping his hand from his face.

“This is ridiculous, Ethan,” Ethan told himself, patting his face several times. “Just look at his text.”

Ethan opened the chat and stared at the singular word.

Chris

Hey

That was it. Hey. Ethan thought it was terribly frustrating to see such a short message. Ethan got no gage into what Chris was thinking or feeling with such a vague message. Regardless, Chris was texting him for the first time and Ethan wanted to enjoy it. He decided to give Chris a taste of his own medicine.

Ethan

Hi

Ethan didn’t even add an emoji to his hi. He wondered if Chris was as confused over Ethan’s response as Ethan had been about Chris's. Ethan saw those three little dots show up seconds before Chris responded.

Chris

How have you been?

How have I been? Ethan wondered with a humorless chuckle. I’ve been complaining that you don’t care about me for the entire day, actually.

Ethan decided not to tell Chris any of this. He didn’t want Chris to think that he was a loner and telling him about how upset he was today wouldn’t help his case. But, he did want Chris to know that he was still open to them talking more.

Ethan

Ive been good

been listening to some ybn cordae actually

Chris

really???

thats sick!

I knew youd like him

Ethan giggled softly to himself at Chris's response. On the drive back the previous day, Chris had raved about how good ybn cordae was. Ethan wasn’t a huge rap fan but because he did have songs like The Box and Fancy by Drake in his playlist, he thought that he might as well give him a listen. And, it was Chris who’d asked him. Ethan may have bent the truth just slightly because he had listened to ybn cordae a couple of hours ago, but that was a tiny detail. 

Seeing Chris's obvious excitement, Ethan forgot all about his plan to be calculated in his responses. Ethan and Chris texted for the next three hours. Ethan finished his homework, ate, and did a dozen other things but continued to come back to his phone to talk to Chris. 

Ethan may not be Chris's boyfriend or one of his friends, but he knew that at the very least, he could make Chris laugh. For now, that would have to be enough.