It had been two months of chaperoned luncheons, afternoon teas, ice cream rendezvous, and late strolls through the gardens of Hereford. I had enjoyed my time with Elijah immensely, and the more time we spent together the stronger my feelings for him grew. I had no idea what it was about him that appealed to the once icy core where my heart sits, and as I sat under my golly tree trying to draw his features, my breath caught in my throat. 

Maybe it was his beautiful curly sandy blonde hair, his ocean blue eyes, or those dimples that aligned perfectly with his face whenever he smiled at me. Or, perhaps it was his deep voice that seemed to sooth me when we talked about everything yet nothing, his ability to make me laugh when I was upset at the Viscountess and her never ending meddling, or the comfort I feel in his presence even in the quiet of our time at my, ney, our golly tree.

We lock eyes and he smiles at me so sweetly that my heart beat flows from my chest to my toes. He sat up from his position on the ground in front of me and sat up on his elbow. We said nothing and just stared at each other. I do not know when the Duke rose from laying in the grass, but suddenly he was seated right in front of me. We gravitated closer to each other. Almost as if our DNA held opposite ends of magnetic poles. Another smile graced his lips, causing my own smile to break free.

"Are you done with my portrait, Miss Devereux?" He put his hand under my chin pulling me closer to him.

"Not quite. There seems to be something distracting me." My hands find his in the grass, and we move closer.

"I wonder what could be distracting such a lovely lady as yourself." Our noses touched, and I could fill his breath on my lips.

"Perhaps it is a certain Duke I have recently been introduced to." He laughs and our lips touch slightly.

"Perhaps?" Our lips touch and my mouth moves against his as he utters the word. 

In an instant our lips move against each other in a slow passionate kiss. Passion that I did not know I possessed. His mouth devoured mine and my lips fought to show him what I could not deduce to him. That my heart yearned for him the second he left my sight, and my body craved him in the late hours of the night. Our kiss grew more ravenous as the seconds passed. His tongue grazed my lips pleading for entrance, and I accepted the taste of him eagerly. The contact of his tongue on mine stole the air from my lungs and I clung to his mouth. 

Muffled sounds of euphoria escaped my lips and Elijah devoured each of them as they sprang from my throat. His hands caressed my body and my hands gravitated towards his gorgeous hair, pulling each other in closer. I couldn't breath and if it meant I had to part from him, this kiss, this moment then I didn't not want to. His lips left mine and made a road map kisses along my face. He kissed my forehead, my cheeks, my chin, and my ears. Stopping slightly to nibble my ears and earning another round of delighted cries from my lips. He moved on to my neck, kissing and biting with just the right amount of pressure. 

Taking his time as if we had all the time in the world. He ventured further down my body, kissing my exposed chest and the tops of my breasts that were taunting him from my emerald green dress. My breath hitched and he continued his trail of kisses on my exposed skin. I ran my fingers through his hair pulling him in closer. Then....

The sounds of my brother's hootering echoed towards us. We sprang free from each other, fighting to breathe in air. Just as they reach us Elijah lay calmly in his previous spot seemingly posing for his portrait with all evidence on my lips on his gone. Gathering My pencil and pad from the ground I attempted to continue drawing his likeness pretending I was not in his embrace just seconds ago. They joined us under our golly tree, and continued with their conversation and chortling. Frustrated they broke us from our canoodling, I blew out a breath. When I had gained their attention, I feigned a yawn.

"Are you growing weary of the Duke's company already Beanie? I dare say I'm surprised, for I thought he would be more entertaining." Samuel jeered.

"I do believe our dear friend has his work cut out for him. Our sister is no ordinary lady, and bores easily." Silas chimed in.

"Or perhaps our sister is too smart to fall for Hamilton's charm. She is far brighter than his other companions he's pursued before her. They practically dropped their skirts...." Simon began but he clamped his mouth shut when he remembered my presence.

Everyone froze and my eyes met Elijah's. I tore my eyes from his glance and searched each of their faces. I tried my best to hold a carefree facial expression. My heart sank and my stomach churned. I blinked away the feeling. Perhaps I had eaten something foul for dinner that evening.

 Selim cleared his throat. "Do not fret Beanie. It is only a small matter of business. You are the most agreeable of the matches the Duchess has arranged for Hamilton. In fact, you are the only match Hamilton made with his mother." Selim rushes out.

Sebastian sighs. "You must know the Duchess only has Hammi's best interest at heart. Mother and Father made it aware that you are unsure about marriage. The arrangement is agreeable for both of you." 

Their words were lost on me. I could only wonder if what encountered between the Duke and I, also transpired between the other ladies he was courting. They were all watching me to gauge my reaction, but I did not know how I felt on the matter myself. So I put on my warmest smile and yawn again. 

"You were all wrong. I am simply tired from the long days events." I gather my drawing materials and before I can stand on my feet Elijah is holding his hand out to help me up from my spot. The churning in my stomach grows, and I stand without his help. "I shall think I will retire to my rooms. Good night."

A hurt look flashes across his face and disappears just as quickly. "Might I walk you back to the estate? If you should like the company." 

His eyes hold hope, but I smile in response. "I have enjoyed your company thus far, your grace. I could not possibly take up anymore of your time." I turn and begin to walk quickly towards Hereford manor.

"Sabine, please... Just a moment." Against my mind urging my legs to walk, my heart convinces me to pause.

"If you insist, your grace, you may accompany me." He is by my side in a second and we walk silently towards the manor.

Just when we are out of earshot from my brothers, he speaks. "I'm sorry, but I thought it better not to tell you about the other ladies. It is just a formality, but I have invited them to the estate for the ball."

There goes my heart again, this time falling to my feet. "Do you...kiss all of them? Us?"

He stops walking, and does not speak. I continue to walk and leave him by the garden entrance, willing myself to keep walking until I reach my rooms. I hear him walking behind me again, and when we reach the entrance he grabs my hand turning me to face him. "I have kissed them yes, but not in the way I kiss you. It is all proper kisses on the hand and such."

I study his face and he avoids my gaze. I pull myself free from his hold. It was a lie. "I was indifferent to the knowledge of your other marriage prospects because I believed you felt something for me, until you just lied to me about your intimate encounters with them. Just when I began to feel something for you." I turn away and begin my trek up the entrance stairs. 

"I only lied to spare your feelings Sabine.” He states matter of factly.

I stop and turn on him. "Please, I do not need you to spare my feelings, and I doubt it is meaningless." I approached him enraged.

“I do not wish to hurt you over something that is meaningless because I think… I think I love you." he blurts out.

I scoff, but my heart skips a beat at the word love. “You think…how? How could you think you love me when you have kissed others as you have kissed me.” Tears well up in my eyes, but I blink them away.

"With you it is different. I feel different with you, but with others it was mere physical attraction." He pleads softly.

I scoff. "So you have no physical attraction for me, but you have it for all of the others?!" 

He runs his fingers through his hair as he paces in a circle growing frustrated. "No! I- Of course I am attracted to you physically. It was just easier- You do not understand." he sighs. "Sabine, I want more with you. Not just the physical things. Please be rational."

"Rational? How can you know what you want with me versus the others? There must be so many women vying for the Duke of Hamilton's wealth and title! You can not possibly be able to separate your many conquests." I fold my arms like a child out of anger.

"Are you curious to know how many women I have courted? Is that it?" He moves towards me and I move back.

"Of course not." I huff and turn towards the entrance to my home.

"Then pray tell me, what is it that you want me to say right now!?" He growls as he lightly grasps my arm pulling me back.

"I do not know! What the mighty Duke of Hamilton wants to say is for you to decide. I will tell you that I do not take kindly to being played about. It is a lot for me to be open about my feelings. You may think you love me, but I am sure I…” I stop myself and take a breath. “I have been considering marriage between us, and I was prepared to…to accept you if you should have asked me for my hand. And now I can not help but think that it was all for naught." He steps closer, pulling me into his embrace. His eyes bore into mine.

"It was not. I have not seen any of those other ladies in nearly a month. I have not laid my lips upon another lady, aside from you, since I began our courtship. Sabine, you are not opening up alone, and I apologize if my actions made you feel that way. Do not think you are alone in the consideration of marriage. I have told you how I feel, and I meant it." 

He pulls me into a kiss of something other than that of passionate woes. It felt familiar and different. We broke free gasping for air, and I was in a daze.

"I must go and see to matters at Hamilton estate. I have many things to prepare for the guests attending the Hamilton ball. I do not wish to leave, but I must for now. Goodnight Sabine." He brushes a soft kiss on my forehead.

"Goodnight, your grace. I shall see you at your estate tomorrow."

He reluctantly turns and leaves, and I return to my room, and undress quickly. My heart continues to rise and drop. I was unsure how I felt, but I knew one thing, I love him more than I care to admit. To know what I thought was special between us was shared evenly with others, made me sick to the stomach, and now there was a chance I would see these other marriage prospects at Hamilton castle. I sigh deeply as I turn over what my brothers said, and the lie the Duke told me just now. I try to decipher if he slipped another lie in our parting words, but I can not find any. I sit up in my four-post bed and write in my secret book until my eyes close and I succumb to the dark comfort of sleep.