Again
They were there in front of him again. Together.
What were the chances that he would come across them at 2AM on a weeknight in the light of the nearby empty convenience store?
It wasn’t as though he hadn’t known they were going to meet. Si Woo had texted him earlier that day, notifying him that he had plans to meet with the group. But he hadn’t specified where. So then what coincidence drove them that he would come upon them as he was heading home from his own gathering and in a street that was not near either of their homes nor was a street that was part of their normal path?
Ye Jun shifted slightly on his feet. He knew that he should just leave. He had no plans on interrupting them nor joining them. He had said that he would help Si Woo but from where he stood, it looked as though the sunbae was doing well without his assistance.
That was all the more reason that he should leave them be.
But he seemed unable to move.
“You really are incredible,” he heard Si Woo say with a laugh. “Don’t look at me with a face full of disgust. It’ll just make me find you more adorable. It takes a lot of guts to do what you do and that also makes you cool.”
“What guts?” Jong In grumbled as he stood. “Get up. We’ve been here too long.”
Si Woo tsked. “Always trying to get rid of me. You know, you remind me of someone. He always tried to get rid of me too, at least in the beginning. And then well then he wouldn’t let go.” His words seemed to slur just slightly, “So I ran from him like a damned coward. Ha.”
Ye Jun watched for a long moment, for some reason his eyes seemed glued to the scene before him. There was a strange contemplative expression on the sunbae’s face that struck him and an equal one mirrored in Jong In. He could tell, even from the distance from which he stood, that a form of understanding flowed between them.
Ye Jun had never seen Jong In give someone such undivided attention, at least, to someone who wasn’t him.
“Ha,” he scoffed under his breath. This was ridiculous. Why was he suddenly feeling so annoyed?
Beep. Beep. BEEP! Loud honking suddenly erupted from the darkness and Ye Jun watched as someone who had obviously lost control of his moped was rushing directly to where Si Woo and Jong In sat.
“Jong In!” he shouted, dropping his bag and rushing forward blindly. But he was too late for by the time his feet touched the sidewalk on which they sat, the blue plastic chairs and table were scattered about them.
Thankfully though, Jong In and Si Woo had somehow avoided the collision. The pair were on the ground, several feet away from the impact point, unscathed from the look of things, both breathing heavily with Jong In’s arms wrapped protectively around the sunbae.
Ye Jun’s feet suddenly froze in place and his heartbeat began to increase as an unfamiliar and ugly emotion took over him. He gazed at them for a moment longer, watching as Jong In turned toward the older man and said something in a tone too low for Ye Jun to hear.
He then turned away and left, escaping the scene and unwanted emotion it wrought within him.
~
Three days had passed but the image of that night’s scene did not leave him. Ye Jun wondered why it was that every time he closed his eyes, he could see only Jong In’s face and the beautifully sad expression of that sunbae.
And why did his heart not stop its rapid beating when he recalled those memories?
At first he tried to ignore his thoughts but that proved nearly impossible. So he deliberated and eventually Ye Jun’s mind honed in on the expression Si Woo had worn. He had noted before that Si Woo was the first man he had ever considered beautiful and he wondered if that was the reason why he was possibly reacting the way that he was.
And what exactly was it that he was feeling? It was so unfamiliar and terrible. Because of it, he had wanted to rip the two apart, being unable to stand seeing them so close together.
Jong In had somehow pulled Si Woo out of the way that night. Thankfully no one had gotten hurt and the chaos had masked Ye Jun’s presence, which he was glad for as he wasn’t sure how he would have been able to face either of them with these foreign feelings washing over him at that time.
Ye Jun closed his eyes, irritated.
“Hey, Ye Jun,” came a voice from above him. He looked up. A classmate whose face he vaguely remembered and whose name he could not recall at all looked back at him with a dazzling smile. She was pretty, exactly his type - medium height, shoulder length brown hair, confident, and sexy.
She took the seat next to him.
Other students had begun to pour into the lecture hall.
She dropped her bag on the table and smiled at him. “How are you?” she asked, her voice laced with sympathy.
He looked at her quizzically.
She laughed suddenly. “Wow, I guess it is true. You really do embody that name, don’t you?”
“I’m… sorry?” he asked, entirely lost now.
She grinned again. “‘Ice Prince’. You’re completely unaffected by that breakup, huh? Poor Jiwon. She was sure that she would be the one to crack you. Though her methods were underhanded and unoriginal.”
Ye Jun stared at her for a moment. Though he had met her a few times, he didn’t think that they were close enough for her to run her mouth so much. But he wasn’t surprised, some people seemed to think that he treated dating like a game.
However, it did surprise him how quickly word seemed to have spread. He and Jiwon had broken up just a few weeks ago. They had begun dating only a few days after that uncomfortable encounter with Jong In the year before. She had been one of Ye Jun’s longest running girlfriends. He had believed he had treated her well, he had walked her back to her apartment after classes, had lunch and dates with her regularly, and they had even gone on a short trip together. She had been one of the few who didn’t seem to feel the need to test him or so he had believed.
Ye Jun had known that something had to be going on when Jiwon suddenly started taking longer to respond to his calls or messages or when she canceled a few of their dates to go drinking with friends. He had given her space as he found clinginess to be an unattractive quality. This behavior had gone on for several weeks and started to escalate only a few weeks ago but Ye Jun hadn’t bothered to question or confront her about it. And apparently that had been what caused her to snap.
It was a common affair really, at least to him. They had gone out to eat with some of their mutual friends and upon dropping her off at her apartment, she had told him that she had been seeing another guy in the past few weeks and that she might have developed feelings for him. Ye Jun had stayed quiet, allowing her to talk, already having guessed that that might have been the case. In the end, he had simply suggested that they break up.
The sunbae, who had been known for her charming and cool personality, broke down then, asking if he had even loved her. Ye Jun couldn’t respond, he didn’t want to hurt her further. Despite knowing that he was the victim of infidelity, he wasn’t all that phased, he wasn’t hurt.
He had wanted to keep the details of their breakup quiet, knowing that Jiwon would be more affected than he but somehow the details had leaked. The lives of others was almost like an interesting tv show to people and he found that quite tiresome.
He had gone home that night, extremely drained. He had laid in bed with his phone in hand, which had been blowing up with messages from Jiwon. He ignored those. At that point, it had become his policy to have a clean break when breaking up with someone. And while he didn’t quite feel sad over the breakup, he had felt like talking to someone.
He had felt like talking to Jong In.
But he hadn’t. Instead he had placed his phone on his nightstand and tried to go to sleep, telling himself over and over again that it was the best for them.
Even before he had begun dating Jiwon, Jong In’s behavior had been bothering him a bit. Shortly after starting university, it felt as though Jong In had been trying to monopolize him. And while he didn’t particularly hate it since he enjoyed spending time with him, it felt a bit tiring. They were college students, freshmans. It was a time to meet new people, play, see the world and Jong In was only a small part of Ye Jun’s world.
And that was why he had told him that he needed space. But he hadn’t been certain just how long that would take. He was single now and he wanted to hang out with his friends, he wanted to see Jong In.
But he wouldn’t, not until there was a resolution to Jong In’s feelings. And he knew that meant having him be interested in and dating someone else.
And he himself would continue to date others as well.
It wasn’t as though he had purposely upset Jiwon or his previous girlfriends. It was simply that they had wanted a reaction from him that he could not give. He had even, in the past, tried to fake his jealousy but he was so wholly unfamiliar with the emotion that his attempt had seemed almost cartoonish and obviously fake. That girlfriend had stopped him, saying that he was making light of her feelings. Since then, he simply responded the only way he knew how, with indifference and a touch of acquiescence.
He had accepted, a long time ago, that this was just who he was. No matter whom he dated, they would eventually come to doubt his feelings and would eventually leave him. Just like Jiwon sunbae and the countless others before her and countless others after her, just like the woman who now stood before him.
“So what do you say?” she asked, moving an inch closer just enough for the side of her notably sized chest to touch his arm.
He peered at her face once more. She really was his type. Well, he supposed with a small smile, he didn’t actually hate it.
“I’ll pick you up at 7 tonight.”
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