Chapter 5

Nicole

Mouth salty with cum from a man I hardly knew, I walked out his home and down the front yard in the dark toward Dad’s car parked on the side of the Redwood slums. His car hummed lightly over the fall wind.

“Go good?” he asked through the open window.

“Yes,” I whispered.

“Did you get what I needed?”

After blowing out an unsteady breath, I reached into my bra–trying hard not to wince at the bruises on my chest from the man’s harsh grip on me–and pulled out a small note. I handed Dad the piece of paper and shrugged my shoulders forward. “Here.”

“Good girl.”

I shivered in disgust at the nickname that most girls found sexy. But I couldn’t.

At least, not from him.

Across the street, João from Poison sat on his porch steps and watched us. I shielded my face with my bangs and hoped that he didn’t say anything, because I feared that I’d burst into tears in front of Dad. And I couldn’t do that.

“Get in, Nikki. You have another appointment.”

“Dad,” I whispered from outside of the car. “Please. I need to study.”

Not that I could care about school… I wanted to, but I didn’t have the energy or time.

“We’re going to see Doctor Aldridge, then going home.”

“Okay,” I whispered, peering over at João again who now smoked with Landon.

Once I slipped into the car, Dad placed a hand on my knee. I stared out my passenger window and watched the houses fly by as he drove down the road, manicured fingers digging into my palms. I fished my tongue across my teeth, wanting the salty taste out of my mouth.

“Any news on Yui?”

“I’m partners with Akio on a science project,” I said.

“Oh, yeah?” he hummed. “How’s that going?”

“Fine,” I whispered.

When he stopped at a light, he peered over at me. “It best be going better than fine.”

“I don’t have any information yet,” I said quietly. “It’s only been a day.”

He dug his fingers into my thigh. “It used to take you a couple hours to get what I needed.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I want something by the end of the week.”

“Okay.”

“I’m being serious, Nicole. No more second chances.”

“Or what?” I said before I could stop. I immediately smacked my lips together. “Sorry.”

Dad slammed on the breaks in the middle of the road and seized me by the throat. “Or what?” he repeated. “Or fucking what? You know what will happen to you if you don’t do exactly as I ask, Nicole.”

“I-I’m sorry,” I whispered, attempting to peel his fingers off me so I could breathe. “I’m sorry.”

He ripped Hannah’s gold necklace off my neck. “Don’t forget about your sister.”

After pulling his hand away, he shoved the gold necklace into his pocket. My lips trembled as I stared through the windshield ahead of me, finally having–what I considered–proof that he had something to do with her death.

“I’ll have something for you by the end of the week,” I whispered, pulling out my phone.

As we pulled into the doctor’s office parking lot, I scrolled to Akio’s contact. Still in shock.

Me: Wanna work on the project tomorrow night after cheer?

Me: Your house?

“Get out,” Dad ordered.

I followed him out of the car and into the office. “Can I have my necklace back?”

“No.”

So I snapped my mouth shut and glanced down at my messages with Akio. He typed and typed and typed and didn’t send anything. We walked into a large office and sat across from what looked like a sweet woman with big brown eyes.

“What can I do for you today?” Doctor Aldridge asked.

Dad began diving into everything that he wanted me to get done without my consent while I prayed that Akio would send me a message, so I’d have an excuse not to listen to the horrible things that Dad desired.

Akio: Okay.

Me: We don’t have to…

Akio: No, no, I want you to come over.

Akio: My parents won’t be home, if you’re okay with being alone.

Me: That’s totally fine :) I’d prefer that anyway.

“We can schedule that for a couple weeks. Sound good?” Doctor Aldridge said.

“The sooner the better,” Dad said, flashing her a smirk.

“Alright, is there anything else you’d like done?” she asked Dad.

Of course she wouldn’t ask the woman that would actually be having the procedure. I didn’t have any say in my body, my life, or even my future. Why would I? All I was was Dad’s toy that he could do whatever the hell he wanted.

“Leave, Nicole.”

With tears in my eyes, I grabbed my purse and shuffled out of the doctor’s office before he could force me to stay, before they could ask me more questions, before they could decide my entire life for me.

Once I slipped into the passenger's seat of Dad’s car, I burst out into tears. My mascara ran down my cheeks, but I couldn’t care anymore. Dad didn’t have any more work for me to do tonight, and it was too dark for anyone to truly see.

It had always been too dark for people to see my pain.

To see how much I fucking hurt.

I slammed my fist into the dashboard repeatedly and screamed. “Someone help me!”